Dads And Daddies

Judson reports back on the insanity taking place at work and on trying a new experience during a hookup.  Brian reflects on the passing of his family’s pet. GayVN award-winning porn actor and adult model Joel Someone then joins them in Brian’s basement. Together, the three talk about Joel’s career and how it was born from his need to get out of his native New Mexico, his path from escort to porn star, losing his virginity to a woman on camera, his parents’ discovery of his line of work, and his relationships with his “porn son” (and former Dads and Daddies guest) Jonah Wheeler and his boyfriend King Dwarf. Joel sticks around to help Judson and Brian respond to a “Go Ask Your Dad” question from a listener in his early 30s who has never felt affection from a man and is on the verge of giving up on the gay community and finding love.

Find Joel Someone on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/joel_someone/

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Comparing their week on the apps, Judson laments an aborted mission, and Brian comes up against ageism. Brian shares a glowing review for the Broadway play, “John Proctor is the Villain.” The two then welcome to the podcast Nathan H. Lents, author of The Sexual Evolution: How 500 million years of sex, gender, and mating shape modern relationships. Together, they discuss the difference between sexual and social monogamy, the egalitarian and sex-positive lifestyle of the lesser studied bonobo chimpanzees, how humans look to the animal kingdom to claim justifications (that aren’t there) for their conservative beliefs, how the recent diversity in gender expression is a natural part of evolution, and so much more. Nathan then joins Judson and Brian in responding to a Go Ask Your Dad question from a listener who wants to show more affection to his boyfriend, but doesn’t know how, having been raised in a household where very little affection was shown.

Find Nathan online at linktr.ee/nathanlents

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It’s Dads and Daddies’ 50th Episode! To celebrate, Judson and Brian dedicate this week’s episode to the listeners by responding to FIVE Go Ask Your Dad questions! Ranging from a listener struggling with a toxic friends-with-benefits situation to one who wants help being verbal in bed, to another who wants to ensure his partner’s first hookup outside of their relationship goes off without a hitch, to one who’s having trouble balancing the difference between his sense of adventure versus his husband’s, to a listener looking for guidance on making a hookup happen by cruising IRL, this episode’s questions open up all kinds of conversations about the lives and times of adult gay men in the here and now! But first, Judson tells Brian about his experience recording an episode of Sniffies’ podcast, Cruising Confessions, and Brian talks about his challenges understanding the expectations of a hookup where he is nothing more than the recipient of oral sex.

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Judson shares a moment of pride felt as a Daddy for a Son. Brian reflects on four weeks without sex outside of his marriage. The two discuss feedback from a listener who feels that they prescribe open relationships as being right for everyone and doesn’t agree. They then begin preparations for summer by going deep into the anxiety brought on by vacationing in gay destinations. They explore the reasons we choose to vacation in gay destinations and how those reasons can be at odds, why they feel the pros outweigh the cons, and how they each deal with issues of body image, self-esteem, drug and alcohol prevalence, FOMO and peer pressure. To close, Judson and Brian respond to a series of questions from a listener who is moving to New York and is curious about the dating scene for someone in his 40s, building community and navigating the city sober.

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Judson tells Brian about his first week back at work, which wasn’t without its shocking moments. The two then recount their double date at the new Broadway musical they both loved, Just In Time, starring Jonathan Groff as Bobby Darin and co-authored by previous Dads and Daddies guest Isaac Oliver. Judson and Brian then welcome Sex & Intimacy Coach, Surrogate Partner, and Sacred Intimate Court Vox to the podcast. Court shares how he helps people develop and grow their comfort around touch, eroticism and sexuality and provides his unique insights on body autonomy, the limitations of the apps, the similarities between parents and doms, and so much more.  He then helps Judson and Brian respond to a question from a listener who wants to give his younger partner the freedom to explore sex with others but fears it could mean losing him.

Find Court at TheBodyVox.com, on Instagram at @thebodyvox, or check out his Linktree for all other ways to connect at linktr.ee/CourtVox

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Judson comes to the end of his sabbatical and reflects on everything it has brought him, including a significant amount of sex over the past week. Brian recounts the night he took his family to Kylie Minogue’s first-ever concert at Madison Square Garden. The two are then joined by Carson McCalley and Jack Dodge, hosts of the YouTube series and podcast “Dweeb Wars,” and contestants on the currently-airing 37th Season of “The Amazing Race.” Carson and Jack go deep into their friendship that goes back over a decade, sharing its origins, how they nurture and protect it, how they view each other as ‘platonic soulmates,’ how they balance it with their long-term romantic relationships, and how they came to building an online community together through their show, “Dweeb Wars.” They also reveal secrets of competing in “The Amazing Race” - including their ingenious preparation tactic - and answer questions from two special guest interviewers, Brian’s 9 and 6-year-old daughters. Carson and Jack stick around to help Judson and Brian respond to a Go Ask Your Dad question from a listener struggling with how much he compares himself to his friends and what he sees on social media.

Check out Carson and Jack on Season 37 of The Amazing Race on CBS and Paramount+, and on their own series, Dweeb Wars, at https://www.youtube.com/@DweebWars.

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Judson and Brian return to The Cockpit downstairs at Daniel Nardicio’s Redeye NY for their second live show! Having just reunited with Judson after three weeks apart, Brian regales him with stories he’s been waiting to share about his daughter hearing him and his husband having sex, his struggles using AI to help navigate a Grindr conversation, and having “the talk” with his kids. Judson responds by sharing the memory of finding his parents’ sex tape as a child. The two then welcome Leo Wyatt and Jordan Holland of JXXL to the podcast. Leo and Jordan talk about how they encourage exploration, practice, and play through the private and public parties they throw, what sets their parties apart, how they define openness for themselves, their use of condoms, and what their Daddy Issues are. They then help Judson and Brian answer a series of Go Ask Your Dad questions submitted by the live audience, ranging from what kind of lube all four recommend to how to become more comfortable as a bottom. With a special appearance by returning guest Guy Woof!

JXXL online: JXXL.live/events

JXXL on Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/jxxlcommunity

JXXL on Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/jxxlcommunity.bsky.social

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Judson and Brian are reunited after Judson returns from three weeks of globetrotting with his husband. He recounts highlights of his restorative trip to Sri Lanka, plus a sexy 36-hour layover in Istanbul. Brian happily reports on his recent stress reduction, having survived a dreaded business trip and having come to the annual end of his seasonal blues. They share some listener feedback about inaccurate medical information discussed in an episode from a few weeks prior.  The two then welcome to the podcast Adam MacLean, founder of PostShame.org, host of the podcast “Find Your Light,” and trained sacred intimate.  Adam takes Judson and Brian through his consulting work, helping people reclaim online content others may try to use against them, and his sacred intimate work assisting people to find comfort in their bodies. All three address this week’s Go Ask Your Dad question, which comes from a listener who’s concerned his libido does not match those of his friends and feels pressure to be having more sex than he is.

Show notes:

Find Adam MacLean at PostShame.org and listen to his podcast, Find Your Light

Judson recommends Rachel Kushner’s novel, Creation Lake

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Recorded last September, Judson and Brian share some unusual propositions they’ve each received on the apps before delving into a discussion of the lost art of cruising. They delineate the steps to proper cruising, reminisce about cruising successes and fails they’ve experienced over the years, and make a case for bringing cruising back in the current landscape of hookup apps. They end with a Go Ask Your Dad question from a listener struggling with feelings of jealousy of his friends who he believes are more attractive than he is and are having sex with each other.

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Recorded last May, Judson and Brian share the details of their travel over Memorial Day Weekend ‘24 - Judson to Austin for a weekend of naked yoga, where he performed a stand-up set and met his spirit animal, and Brian to London for a celebration of his tenth wedding anniversary, where he and his husband saw a number of shows and enjoyed a playdate together with a ‘certified werewolf.’ Judson then interviews Brian about his path to fatherhood, from the origins of Brian’s desires to be a father, to his search for the right person to start a family with, to the before, during and after of the surrogacy journeys that brought them their two daughters. Staying on theme, they end with a Go Ask Your Dad question from a divorced dad whose 8 year-old daughter is not reacting well to any affection he’s shown by his new boyfriend.

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