Dear Clementine

Today's episode is from the single friend in a group of loved up couples. They're keen to know how they tell their friends that they're keen to bother with them solo, not just with their partners.

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

For more great Nova Podcasts head to novapodcasts.com.au 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today our bestie needs a little help working through the mixed feelings of gratitude for being pregnant but guilt over the disappointment of the baby's gender.

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

For more great Nova Podcasts head to novapodcasts.com.au 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A relationship ending on good terms is a wonderful thing, but can staying friends with an ex be counter-productive?

Today Clementine answers:

• Last year I entered my first serious (and queer) relationship at 30 years old. Prior to that I was figuring out my sexuality and experimenting with a lot of situationships. We remained friends post-breakup. Basically, we do all the same things we did before except platonically, but lately I am starting to feel like it is holding me back. I'd like to start dating again but it just feels pointless: why go have dinner with someone new when I could have dinner with someone I actually like to spend time with? I'd be lying if I said I didn't still have feelings for my old partner. My question is - is staying friends with my ex healthy or is it holding me back?

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We all have those words that we're working on removing from our vocabulary. Today's question is from a listener keen to know whether 'guys' should be one of them.

Here is the full question that Clementine answers:

• As an Australian who lives in Berlin, I have come face to face with my use of the word 'guys'. It's become an important topic among women in my city. I have consciously been trying to avoid using it and it is easy in text, but since it's been a part of my vocabulary all my life, sometimes it slips out while I'm speaking. My question for you is, where do you stand on the word and what is the future of its use in Australia?

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

There's a cliche that female friendships are always competitive & toxic but that's just not true. Clem explains why to this listener.

Today Clementine answers:
- I have moved overseas and realised I'm wary when coming into new female friendships. After a long-term housemate and a woman I've had a decade-long friendship with regularly "pulled me down a peg", I can't shake feelings of inadequacy. I also grew up in a household where both parents did this as one of their multiple means of control. After years of therapy I am able to reconcile being raised by narcissists, but I'm finding it extremely hard to let go when it comes to these women. How can I portray to potential new female friendships that there's no need to engage in any form of competition? I'm desperate to reduce the risk of this happening again. Do you have any strategies when handling these situations? 

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

For more great Nova Podcasts head to novapodcasts.com.au 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today, a question from a woman who has supported her husband in every single aspect of his life only to find out he's been having an emotional affair.

Here is the full question:
- I’ve been married for almost 10 years (married at 18) and have really been struggling for at least the last five - particularly with trying to get my husband to put in 50% effort when it comes to our household labour. We don’t even have kids but we did get married young. I have been having this fight for years and not gotten anywhere but now it’s at the point where there really isn’t any excuse because I’m earning considerably more than him and still doing 99% of the domestic effort. Well, it came to a head last night when I confronted him about messages I found of him with another woman complaining about how hard done by he is in our relationship etc, incredibly inappropriate intimate personal messages about his wife of almost ten years to a woman he barely knows. Anyway, I didn’t know what else to do other than message you. I’m terrified of what is next, of being alone for the first time since I was 13, of a failed marriage at a young age, and having to go through divorce. Of not knowing who I am. I think I just need some words of support and confirmation that I am doing the right thing, that I’m not overreacting. I don’t have a large support network, so I needed to tell someone who would understand.

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

For more great Nova Podcasts head to novapodcasts.com.au 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

If you've ever felt like making friends is impossible once you're no longer a teenager, you're going to want to listen to this one.

This time, Clementine answers:

• When I was younger I had an extremely easy time connecting with all people. I had a really large friend group and loved chatting and getting into deeper conversations that would facilitate a deep connection and good friendships. As I’ve gotten older, I have noticed that most people have views that are problematic and I don’t want to make the effort. Or when I find a rare person that might be on the same page and who I want to establish a friendship with, I get extremely socially anxious. I only have 3 semi-solid friendships in my life. How do you establish meaningful connections in your late 30's and should I be giving people more grace knowing that, living in a capitalist patriarchy, we’re socially conditioned to have problematic views?

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

For more great Nova Podcasts head to novapodcasts.com.au 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This time, Clementine gives some advice on a relationship that's become tricky to navigate.

Here's the question:

• I've been in a relationship with another woman for nearly ten years. Lately I expressed my honest feelings about the relationship to her and said that I don't really feel the way I once did and that I'm not happy. I have even tried to end the relationship twice but this has not worked out. My partner has told me she doesn't think I want to end the relationship and that she feels that the reason for this is because we are finally looking to move in together. I know I'm no longer the person I was in university and although she has done nothing wrong, I just feel unhappy and trapped in my life, people are constantly telling us we are perfect for each other and it makes me wonder if the issue really is my anxiety. I don't know how to proceed further as I feel I'm stuck whichever way I turn. Do you have any advice for navigating the situation?

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

For more great Nova Podcasts head to novapodcasts.com.au 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today Clementine unpicks a familiar conundrum - a partner who already doesn't take on their share of the mental load, but wants to now add kids to the mix.

• My boyfriend is a lovely person and we have a respectful and affectionate relationship. He does a decent amount of work around the house. My real problem though is I seem to be stuck in a sort of 'management' role in terms of deciding what we will eat, how we will organise our time, and what needs to be done around the home. My partner has problems with anxiety and suspected ADHD so planning and organisation come easier to me than him. But, this dynamic makes me frustrated and resentful towards him, as it feels inappropriate to have to organise another adult's life like this. I am particularly fearful of having a kid, which he is very keen on but I can foresee the burden of decision-making and planning falling much more on me than him. Do you have any advice?

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

For more great Nova Podcasts head to novapodcasts.com.au 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

In this episode, Clementine unpacks a question around how a misogynistic grandfather relates to his grandchildren.

• My question relates to my 72 year old dad who is suffering from Alzheimer's disease and is now living in residential care. While there would be no point to hold him to account due to his cognitive decline, it's hard to reconcile within myself the blatant preference to male family members that he displays. On my weekly visit with my daughter and son, his excitement to see my son is palpable - while my daughter gets a lukewarm response. During our visit he will often repetitively ask about my brother who rarely visits and didn't provide him any support in the last (hard) 5 years. My daughter notices all this - how do I it to explain it all to her? Do I also have a responsibility to make sure my son knows that he isn't necessarily loved more by his grandfather, its just a product of the patriarchy?

If you have a question for Clementine, send an email to [email protected] 

CREDITS 
Executive Producer: Edwina Stott 
Audio Production: Adrian Walton 
Managing Producer: Elle Beattie 

For more great Nova Podcasts head to novapodcasts.com.au 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.