In this episode, Gemini from the PDA Society is joined by Linda Murphy, author of The Declarative Language Handbook and The Co-Regulation Handbook, to explore how declarative language can support PDA children and young people.

Linda explains the difference between declarative and imperative language, and why shifting from telling and directing to wondering and noticing can reduce anxiety and defensiveness. The conversation explores how questions, commands and corrections can inadvertently increase demand sensitivity, particularly for children with a PDA profile.

Gemini and Linda discuss how declarative language creates space for autonomy, supports problem-solving, and strengthens connection. Rather than giving instructions, declarative statements share observations, feelings or information, allowing the child to process and respond without feeling controlled.

Part 1 focuses on understanding the principles behind declarative language, how it supports co-regulation, and why small shifts in communication can have a powerful impact in both home and school settings.

Key Themes

• The difference between declarative and imperative language
• How direct instructions can increase anxiety for PDA children
• Supporting autonomy and problem-solving through communication
• The link between declarative language and co-regulation
• Reducing demand while maintaining connection
• Using language to create safety rather than compliance

Deep Diver Subscriber Episode

For those who would like to go further, Part 2, an exclusive “Deep Diver” subscriber episode, is available through our Training Hub.
You can access it here: https://training.pdasociety.org.uk/pda-podcasts/

Disclaimer

The views and opinions expressed by guest speakers in this podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of the PDA Society. While we aim to provide balanced and inclusive discussions, individual experiences and perspectives may vary. The PDA Society is committed to using language and terminology that reflects the preferences of PDA and autistic people, but sometimes our guests may use language and terminology which differs. Appearance on our podcast is not an endorsement of an individual, and not all of our guests will align with our position on the issues discussed.

Further sources of support and information

• PDA Society Training Hub: https://training.pdasociety.org.uk/pda-podcasts/
• PDA Society Website: https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/
• PDA Society Training: https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/support-and-training/training/
• PDA Society Support Service: https://www.pdasociety.org.uk/support-and-training/support/

Guest links:

Linda’s website: https://www.declarativelanguage.com/