Don't Cut Your Own Bangs

Juanita and I are excited to be back with the next episode in our miniseries, Riding the Waves. The logical first question, “where should I start,” has prompted a lot of discussion around finding confidence in the uncertainty of big feelings and big situations. Here are some of the topics we address::

Starting Messy: It’s okay if your beginning feels imperfect—give yourself permission to start anyway.

Getting Stuck: Negative self-talk and the fear of how things might turn out can stop us before we take even the first step.

Plans vs. Uncertainty: We often collapse “how is it going to go?” with “how is it going to turn out?” They’re not the same. Learn to separate them.

Navigating with a Map or a Compass: Some people need a detailed plan or map, while others are comfortable just knowing which way is north.   

Art and Science of New Beginnings: Where do intuition and logic meet? Balancing creativity with practicality can help us step into the unknown with more confidence.

Handling Misalignment: It’s normal for reality to differ from your vision or dream. What matters is learning from past experiences and trusting that you can handle whatever comes your way.

The “Why” and “The Plan”: Understanding your “why” clarifies the right next step. Gaining clarity can help build self-esteem and self-awareness, even in uncertain times.

Holding Plans Lightly: A light touch avoids rigid thinking and attachment to things you can’t control.

This was such a fun conversation! Tune in next week as we continue to explore the paradox of holding on and letting go, and how to ride the emotional waves that come with new beginnings. 

VISIT DANIELLE’S WEBSITE 

If you’d like more content like this and you want to stay in the know, hop on over to my website (https://danielleireland.com/) and hit subscribe. You will always be up to date on the latest learning material, my blog, and other meaningful content. Just click on the website so that you never miss out.  

JUANITA MOLANO PARRA, MBA, PCC

Juanita is an engineer and MBA turned certified life and leadership coach. Originally from Colombia, she worked in multinational corporate finance and later started her own coaching business—training new coaches and partnering with organizations to transform culture and leadership from within. Her business, Jump Coaching, helps leaders live authentically, lead with purpose, and turn their dreams into reality. Juanita lives in Indianapolis with her husband, their daughter, and two cats.  

Jump Coaching - www.jumpcoaching.co

Jump Start newsletter - https://www.jumpcoaching.co/newsletter

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/juanitamp/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jumpcoaching.co/

Email - [email protected]

Phone - 317.969.7363

DANIELLE IRELAND, LCSW

Thank you for your support and engagement as part of the Don't Cut Your Own Bangs community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website - https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal - https://danielleireland.com/journal

Substack - https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog - https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

Hello! I’m excited to be back with the 16th season of the Don't Cut Your Own Bangs podcast! This season—all season—I am joined by Juanita Molano Parra, an experienced life and leadership coach. Together, we are going to examine ways to navigate big feelings, big situations, and big questions. More specifically, we’ll consider what becomes possible and available when we hold big ideas lightly. Our conversations will focus on looking for ways to make the harder, more challenging times in life feel more approachable, less confusing and scary.

In each episode we’ll name a topic, explore why it is hard to deal with, and call out the things that get in the way of clarity. We’ll share real-life experiences, including many of our own. Instead of offering hard and fast solutions, we will discuss practices, habits, and ideas for you to explore. In other words, we won’t be making the emotional waves smaller, but we will provide ways for you to feel more confident stepping into the water and seeing where the ride takes you.

RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE TO “DON’T CUT YOUR OWN BANGS”

Like your favorite recipe or song, the best things in life are shared. When you rate, review, and subscribe to this podcast, your engagement helps me connect with other listeners just like you. Plus, subscriptions just make life easier for everybody. It's one less thing for you to think about and you can easily stay up to date on everything that’s new. So, please rate, review, and subscribe today. 

JUANITA MOLANO PARRA, MBA, PCC

Juanita is an engineer and MBA turned certified life and leadership coach. Originally from Colombia, she worked in multinational corporate finance and later started her own coaching business—training new coaches and partnering with organizations to transform culture and leadership from within. Her business, Jump Coaching, helps leaders live authentically, lead with purpose, and turn their dreams into reality. Juanita lives in Indianapolis with her husband, their daughter, and two cats.  

Jump Coaching - www.jumpcoaching.co

Jump Start newsletter - https://www.jumpcoaching.co/newsletter

LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/juanitamp/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/jumpcoaching.co/

Email - [email protected]

Phone - 317.969.7363

DANIELLE IRELAND, LCSW

Thank you for your support and engagement as part of the Don't Cut Your Own Bangs community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website - https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal - https://danielleireland.com/journal

Substack - https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog - https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube - https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

Please note: This episode includes a discussion of pregnancy and miscarriage.  

Our series on “The Right Kind of Hard” would not be complete without an examination of radical acceptance. It's probably the hardest to do, which makes it the rightest of the hardest to do. Ultimately, I think, the degree of difficulty makes radical acceptance most worthy of our energy and exploration.  

How does radical acceptance apply to everything that we've explored so far? Why is it hard? Why do we avoid it? What does it really mean? 

When we’re faced with a new reality that we don't like — a reality that hurts — we often try to negotiate with that reality. We focus on what was or what we think should have been, or we create a future that is not based in reality.  

Our other option is to recognize that our new reality is the right kind of hard. Only after we allow ourselves to sit with the discomfort can we accept it and perhaps even embrace it because only then can we see that we have choices. 

As always, thank you so much for listening. I hope you’ve found value in this series on “The Right Kind of Hard.” I'll be back with new episodes in July after taking a short break. In the meantime, give yourself a therapeutic experience: feed the birds, tell jokes, make bad art, be silly. Let yourself play.

RESOURCES 

Listener’s Favorite (ep. 35): You Are Not Alone. A Miscarriage Solocast 

https://dontcutyourownbangs.libsyn.com/listeners-favorite-ep-35-you-are-not-alone-a-miscarriage-solocast 

FOLLOW DANIELLE ON SUBSTACK

I’m now on Substack and I’d love for you to check it out. Substack is its own platform that is teeming with my favorite thought leaders, writers, and authors—incredible people out in the world who are asking interesting questions and exploring interesting answers. I'm throwing my hat in the ring and putting engaging content out there, too. So, click the link (https://danielleireland.substack.com/) to subscribe. You’ll stay up to date and never miss out on the best new material. 

CONNECT WITH DANIELLE 

I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website: https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal

Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

Pursuing a goal. Chasing a dream. Improving your life. You're working hard to achieve something, but how do you know if you're making progress or even if you’re on the right track? My goal is to help you answer these questions with our series, “The Right Kind of Hard.”  

This exploration hinges on a specific quote. (I think I heard it from Wayne Dyer.) Here it is: “When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” It’s a smart take on perspective. Let's use it to view unconditional love from a different angle.  

People often refer to unconditional love as the pinnacle, the ultimate love. But think about your relationships. Do healthy relationships rely on structure, rules, and boundaries? If so, what does that tell us about unconditional love? Can unconditional love co-exist with conditions? What conditions help you thrive?

I invite you to join me in re-thinking one of our most cherished assumptions as we continue to pursue the right kind of hard.  

As always, thank you for listening. 

RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE

I strongly believe that the best things in life are shared. And one of the best ways for you and I to share is for you to rate, review, and subscribe to this podcast. Your feedback tells me what you like and what you want more of. It helps make the podcast easier for others to find me and helps me create a podcast that’s better for you. Plus, subscriptions just make life easier for everybody. It's one less thing for you to think about and you can easily keep up to date on everything new. So, please rate, review, and subscribe today. 

CONNECT WITH DANIELLE 

I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website: https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal

NEW! Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

Our series on “the right kind of hard” has made clear the need to actively take breaks. When I'm in the middle of processing something—whether I’m cooking up a new idea or trying to keep an idea alive or trying to push something over the finish line—I want to honor the process and let things rest when needed. Taking a pause actually can be the most effective way to move forward. 

So I'm taking a moment to pause and reflect and use a more consistent and deliberate way of checking in with myself. Perhaps you need a pause, too. If so, here are a few questions to consider. Think about them. Jot them down. Maybe even turn them into a journal exercise.

1 - How much time have I spent on (or avoiding) this thing? 

2 - Have I defined what progress looks and feels like?  

3 - Do I have or need an accountability buddy?  

4 - How am I feeling before, during, and after? 

5 - What do I really, really want?  

Balancing creativity and ambition with periods of pause can help us maintain focus and momentum without becoming overwhelmed. So, if you want to reignite your creative spark or simply find a healthier pace in life, join me as we explore the transformative power of taking a break, a concept far more beneficial than mere rest. 

Thanks for listening!

THE TREASURED JOURNAL - https://danielleireland.com/journal

I believe in the power of journaling to achieve the clarity needed for personal growth. It’s just that simple. The questions, prompts, and sentence stems in The Treasured Journal will help guide you as you examine the important themes in your life. Learn more about this specially designed journal and its companion, the Meditation Series, at https://danielleireland.com/journal.

CONNECT WITH DANIELLE 

I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website: https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal

NEW! Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

This season we are exploring “the right kind of hard,” which is all about identifying and doing the most relevant and useful work for personal and professional growth. So, I am thrilled to sit down with my dear friend, Lindsay Boccardo, who is perfectly suited for this topic.  

As someone who makes her living developing leaders and teams and great work environments, Lindsay is acutely familiar with key questions around motivation, mindset, and self-awareness—many of the same questions we’re tackling here this season. 

Lindsay is both engaged and engaging, fun, and a wealth of knowledge. She shares stories and insights that draw on her expertise as a coach, speaker, and trainer. One of the things I love most about Lindsay is her ability to distill complex ideas into a simple, actionable framework for growth. So, get ready for some tangible takeaways that you can apply to your own journey.  

I also want to encourage you to visit Lindsay’s website. She has some exciting new offerings like "The Band" and "Dynamite Delivery," both of which are focused on advancing careers through emotional intelligence and developing communication skills.  

Let me know what you think about this discussion and your own experiences with “the right kind of hard.” And, as always, thanks for listening! 

CONNECT WITH LINDSAY BOCCARDO

Website - https://www.lindsayboccardo.com/

The Band - https://www.practicewithlindsay.com/

Dynamite Delivery with Lindsay Boccardo - https://micdropworkshop.com/product/dynamite-delivery-with-lindsay-boccardo/

SUBSCRIBE TO MY WEBSITE 

If you’d like more content like this and you want to stay in the know, hop on over to my website (https://danielleireland.com/) and hit subscribe. There you will always be up to date on the latest learning material, my blog, and other content. Just click on the website so that you never miss out.  

CONNECT WITH ME 

I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website: https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal

NEW! Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

I hope you have a teacher in your life who means as much to you as Dr. Michael O’Hara means to me. He is a wonderful mentor and a lovely person. If you’re wondering why I gush over him in my introduction, you will understand as our discussion unfolds. 

Michael and I can easily pick up where we left off even when we haven’t seen each other in a while. That’s how we begin this interview, but trust me, our talk of the theatre dovetails perfectly into “The Right Kind of Hard.” 

We explore so many key concepts—from the importance of fundamentals to manufacturing accountability, and seemingly everything in between. I hope you find this as inspirational and eye-opening as I did. 

I’m so pleased to introduce you to my friend, Dr. Michael O’Hara. Thank you for listening.

“As long as I have want, I have reason for living. Satisfaction is death.” –George Bernard Shaw

__________________________

THE MUNCIE CIVIC THEATRE The Muncie Civic Theatre proudly presents “Fiddler on the Roof.” Get tickets at the link below to catch one of the final performances of this beloved musical!

Thursday, April 25 - Sunday, April 28 https://munciecivic.org/

THE ANONYMOUS ENSEMBLE https://anonymousensemble.org/

ELIZABETH GILBERT Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear https://www.amazon.com/Big-Magic-Creative-Living-Beyond/dp/1594634726

SIMON SINEK Start with Why https://simonsinek.com/books/start-with-why/

THE TREASURED JOURNAL - https://danielleireland.com/journal I believe in the power of journaling to achieve the clarity needed for personal growth. It’s just that simple. When you start journaling, it’s not essential that you use The Treasured Journal—a plain sheet of paper will do. But, the questions, prompts, and sentence stems in the journal will help guide you as you examine the important themes in your life. Learn more about this specially designed journal and its companion Meditation Series at https://danielleireland.com/journal.

CONNECT WITH ME  I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website: https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal

NEW! Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

In a recent substack, I wrote about “Falling, Farting & Misspelled Words.” Why? Well, because our fears and insecurities are not unique to us. We are all special, but our hangups are not. It’s an important topic, but kind of a funny one, too!

We tend to think that our pain is too deep and personal to share. We think others simply won't understand or can’t know how we feel. So, we bury our pain. We mask it, self-medicate, go shopping—anything to avoid it. But, in doing so, we also avoid the hard thing that could get us back on track.  

This episode expands on my substack essay and even includes a quick and creative visual exercise for looking fear in the face. It’s part of our special series, “The Right Kind of Hard.” It's about understanding that we will not be cast out into The Great Void if we fall or fart or misspell a word. 

Sharing our fears, insecurities, and pain—and really facing them—is healing and transformative. That’s what the right kind of hard is all about.

Thank you for listening! 

I’M ON SUBSTACK

I’m now on Substack and I’d love for you to check it out. Substack is its own platform that is teeming with my favorite thought leaders, writers, and authors—incredible people out in the world who are asking interesting questions and exploring interesting answers. I'm throwing my hat in the ring and putting engaging content out there, too. So, click the link (https://danielleireland.substack.com/) to subscribe. You’ll stay up to date and never miss out on the best new material. 

CONNECT WITH ME 

I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website: https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal

Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

Have you ever found yourself in a situation where you're avoiding a topic or a task? You feel an uncomfortable twist in your gut or maybe you notice it in someone else, like when they're fidgeting or avoiding eye contact at the start of a conversation. 

Trust me, we've all been there. And often, we're not quite sure if we're avoiding the thing because we're just not ready to face it or if we're actually preparing ourselves for the challenge ahead.  

The good news is there’s a way to make the discomfort work for you. But first, you need to understand the distinction between the right kind of hard and the wrong kind. The right kind of hard acknowledges the discomfort. It helps you inch your way into it even if you're not sure what is on the other side. It's about being real with yourself, even when it's tough. 

On the flip side, the wrong kind of hard is all about pretending. Toxic positivity, delusional thinking—basically telling yourself (and others) a story to avoid the real conversation. The wrong kind leads to unnecessary suffering.

In this miniseries on “The Right Kind of Hard,” we will learn how to identify the right kind from the wrong kind and how to get plugged into useful work so that we can move along a path that helps us grow. 

I’m so glad you’re here as part of the “Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Thank you for listening!

SUBSCRIBE TO MY WEBSITE 

If you’d like more content like this and you want to stay in the know, hop on over to my website (https://danielleireland.com/) and hit subscribe. There you will always be up to date on the latest learning material, my blog, and other content. Just click on the website so that you never miss out.  

THE TREASURED JOURNAL - https://danielleireland.com/journal

I believe in the power of journaling to achieve the clarity needed for personal growth. It’s just that simple. When you start journaling, it’s not essential that you use The Treasured Journal—a plain sheet of paper will do. But, the questions, prompts, and sentence stems in the journal will help guide you as you examine the important themes in your life. Learn more about this specially designed journal and its companion, the Meditation Series, at https://danielleireland.com/journal.

CONNECT WITH ME 

I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website: https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal

NEW! Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured

Welcome back to a brand new season of “Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs!” 

Diving back into podcasting after a bit of a hiatus—actually, diving back into anything after a hiatus—can prompt procrastination and cold feet, especially when life has dramatically changed in the meantime. Have you experienced that, too?

Late last year my husband and I had a second child—a baby boy—and his older sister is now a “threenager!” So, as I sit down in front of the microphone again, well, there is a lot going on. Some moments are hard, but it's a beautiful kind of chaos with unexpected turns and occasions of pure joy. 

Through it all, I’m seeing a theme emerge and many of my clients are experiencing something similar. We’re willing to do the hard work to improve ourselves, our parenting, our relationships, and our careers. But, are we investing in “the right kind of hard?” Is the work serving us and helping us be the best we can be? How do we know if we’re on the right path?

We will focus on this universal theme in a series of new episodes that include personal stories, engaging guests, practical exercises, journal prompts, and more. So, if you’re feeling stuck or looking for direction, tune into the series and we’ll figure it out together. 

I’m eager to get going on this new season of “Don’t Cut Your Own Bangs” and I’m thrilled that you’re along for the ride. Thank you for listening!

NEW! I’M ON SUBSTACK

I’m now on Substack and I’d love for you to check it out. Substack is its own platform that is teeming with my favorite thought leaders, writers, and authors—incredible people who are asking interesting questions and exploring interesting answers. I'm throwing my hat in the ring and putting engaging content out there, too. So, click the link (https://danielleireland.substack.com/) to subscribe. You’ll stay up to date and never miss out on the best new material. 

CONNECT WITH ME 

I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the “Don't Cut Your Own Bangs” community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Website: https://danielleireland.com/

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal

NEW! Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Blog: https://danielleireland.com/blog/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW

Podcast on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@danielleireland8218/featured