Welcome back to Don't Cut Your Own Bangs — the podcast that makes big feelings feel less scary and approaching them feel possible. Today I'm joined by someone who embodies ease and joy and wants to help you do the same - La Shell Wooten, and this conversation is one you're going to feel in the best way.

We dive into the messy middle — that "What the hell am I doing?" space we all land in sometimes — and explore how to stop ditching yourself when life gets overwhelming. Instead, we talk about how your emotions can become your emotional GPS system guiding you forward — toward ease, possibility, and joy that doesn't require heroic effort or a personality makeover.

• Why the messy middle is unavoidable (and often surprisingly useful)

• The difference between self-abandonment and self-trust

• Seeing emotions as information, not something to fear

• How to find "the next right thing" without forcing it

• The power of choosing joy — even when life is uncertain

• "Your emotions aren't obstacles — they're messengers."

• "You don't have to overhaul your life to invite joy in."

• "Sometimes clarity whispers before it ever shouts."

This episode is warm, funny, and deeply grounding — the perfect companion for your walk, your car ride, or your "I need a moment" moment.

💛 If this episode resonated, please rate, review, and subscribe. Your support helps this community grow — and it truly means the world.

https://liinks.co/lashell.wooten

Podcast on Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/0VFZulonTvaa2HIPyJa4Tq?si=JyAzazfISPWyg6I11hAylg Podcast on Apple https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dont-cut-your-own-bangs/id1427579922 Watch on YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@DontCutYourOwnBangs

The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal Wrestling a Walrus: https://danielleireland.com/wrestling-a-walrus Substack: https://danielleireland.substack.com/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@dontcutyourownbangspod

This week on Don't Cut Your Own Bangs, I welcome back one of the most impactful guests in the show's history — Marianne Talkovski, emotional wellbeing strategist, acupuncturist, Chinese medicine practitioner, author, coach, and the creator of The Wellbeing Code.

Marianne has been one of the most trusted practitioners in my personal healing journey, and in this conversation she breaks down the deep connection between our emotions, our physical body, and how burnout and anxiety take root when we ignore what we feel.

Through her lens of Chinese medicine, emotional intelligence, and nervous-system regulation, Marianne helps us understand:

• Why regulating your nervous system is the first step to healing burnout

• How emotional suppression shows up in the body as symptoms, stagnation, and stress

• What the five Chinese elements reveal about your personality type and emotional patterns

• How to know the difference between striving from fear vs striving from wisdom

• Why travel, adventure, and stepping outside your "operating life" can spark profound clarity

• The four-part Wellbeing Code: Regulate, Rewire, Resync, Radiate

• Why belonging to yourself is the foundation for belonging anywhere else

One of my favorite quotes from the episode: "You can't outthink your emotions. Regulation has to happen before transformation."

Whether you're recovering from burnout, craving emotional clarity, or learning how to trust yourself again — this episode will gently guide you back home.

Website: https://mariannewellbeing.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marianne_talkovski Marianne's Books: https://mariannewellbeing.com/books

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DontCutYourOwnBangs Website: https://danielleireland.com The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/danielleireland.LCSW Listen on Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/dont-cut-your-own-bangs/id1372599664 Listen on Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/2b7Ybj9RbM3c3Lh56N3D2G

Please rate, review, and subscribe — it helps the show reach more people who need this work. And as always, thank you for being here. You belong here.

Welcome back to Don't Cut Your Own Bangs — the podcast that makes big feelings feel less scary and approaching them feel possible.

In this week's episode, I sit down with Jessica Fein, author, storyteller, and self-described reluctant grief expert. Jessica's story is both heartbreaking and life-affirming. After losing her two sisters and her teenage daughter, Dalia, she discovered that the greatest act of love we can offer is to say the name and share the story.

Together, we explore how grief transforms us, how to stay connected to the people we've lost, and how storytelling can bring light to even the darkest seasons of life. This episode is an invitation to soften your heart toward your own pain and let love — not fear — lead the way.

1. Saying their name is sacred. It honors both memory and love.

2. Grief and joy can coexist. Healing isn't about "getting over it" — it's about learning to live alongside it.

3. Creativity helps us find joy again. Making something — a story, a meal, a moment — reconnects us to life.

4. Connection begins with honesty. You don't have to fix someone's pain to be present for it.

📖 Breathtaking: A Memoir of Family, Dreams, and Broken Genes → https://jessicafeinwrites.com/breathtaking

🎙 I Don't Know How You Do It → https://jessicafeinwrites.com/podcast

✍️ The Writer Salon → https://writers-salon.mn.co/

💌 Jessica's Survival Kit → https://jessicafeinwrites.com/resources

📘 The Treasured Journal: danielleireland.com/journal

🐧 Wrestling a Walrus: https://danielleireland.com/wrestling-a-walrus

🌐 danielleireland.com 📸 Instagram 📺 YouTube

If this conversation resonates, share it with someone who might need it today. Because love doesn't end when life does — and sometimes, the bravest thing we can do is say the name and tell the story.

Welcome to Don't Cut Your Own Bangs — the podcast that makes big feelings feel less scary and approaching them feel possible.

I'm Danielle Ireland, LCSW, and today's episode is your Stress Reset: Holiday Boundaries and Presence — your one-stop, low-stress recap of my five-part series Put Down the Panic: A Kinder Guide to Stress.

Think of this episode like a cozy audio love note — equal parts humor, heart, and a gentle nudge to slow down before the chaos of the season pulls you under.

I'm walking you through: - Why exhaustion isn't laziness (it's a signal, not a flaw). - What burnout really looks like — and how to catch it before it pulls you under. - The power of saying "no" kindly (and why that's a gift to everyone). - How to turn down the volume on stress when life gets too loud. - And why your body's signals are the wisest holiday planner you have.

Together we'll laugh, breathe deeper, and hopefully feel seen — because no, you're not the only one who's almost cried during family photos or used caffeine as a coping mechanism.

🎁 Resources Mentioned in the Episode: • The Treasured Journal — 7-part guided journal + meditations for self-reflection • Wrestling a Walrus — a children's book for little people with big feelings • Free Meditation Bundle — 3 calming tracks to ground you when things feel too heavy

If this episode helped you breathe a little easier, share it with a friend who's "powering through." And remember — the magic of the holidays isn't something you create; it's something you allow yourself to feel.

Connect with me: 📺 YouTube: @DontCutYourOwnBangs 🌐 Website: danielleireland.com 📸 Instagram: @DontCutYourOwnBangs

Welcome (back!) to Don't Cut Your Own Bangs — the podcast that makes big feelings feel less scary and approaching them feel possible. I'm Danielle Ireland, LCSW, and in this episode, I'm joined by Dr. Kate Lund — psychologist, TEDx speaker, and author of Step Away: A Modern Guide for Overwhelmed Parents to Reclaim Strength and Connection.

If you've been feeling burnt out, stretched thin, or overwhelmed by life, this conversation will help you find calm in the chaos. Dr. Kate shares her story — from growing up with a rare medical condition to parenting twins — and how those experiences shaped her understanding of resilience, context, and compassion. Together, we explore what it really takes to bounce back, not by pushing harder, but by slowing down and reconnecting with what matters most.

✨ In this episode, you'll learn:

• A 5-minute relaxation technique to instantly reduce overwhelm

• Why intentional living beats perfectionism when you're stretched thin

• How to build emotional resilience and model calm for your family

• Small daily habits that create space, peace, and perspective

Favorite Quotes:

• "Intentionality is the antidote to overwhelm."

• "Context is your lane — drive that road well."

• "Start the day modulated, not already maxed."

Because you deserve calm, clarity, and connection — without having to earn it.

🎧 Listen & Subscribe: Spotify | Apple Podcasts | YouTube

Learn more about Dr. Kate's work: Step Away: A Modern Guide for Overwhelmed Parents to Reclaim Strength and Connection The Optimized Mind Podcast by Dr. Kate Lund www.katelundspeaks.com

🌿 Connect with Danielle: 📺 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@DontCutYourOwnBangs 🌐 Website: https://danielleireland.com/ 📖 The Treasured Journal: https://danielleireland.com/journal 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/danielleireland_lcsw

Children's Book: https://danielleireland.com/wrestling-a-walrus

Subscribe for more gentle, therapy-informed conversations on stress, burnout recovery, and emotional wellness. 👉 Subscribe here: https://www.youtube.com/@DontCutYourOwnBangs and join the Don't Cut Your Own Bangs community — because you deserve calm without having to earn it.

The holiday season is here, and with it comes an avalanche of invitations, requests, and expectations. Parties, bake sales, family gatherings, end-of-year deadlines—it's the season of "yes." And before I know it, my energy tank starts flashing empty.

In this final episode of Put Down the Panic: A Kinder Guide to Stress, I wanted to end on one of the most important themes of the entire series: boundaries—and how to say no kindly, clearly, and without guilt.

If the word no gets caught in your throat or you find yourself agreeing to things you never actually wanted to do, you're not alone. I've been there too. Saying no can feel like disappointing people or breaking some invisible rule about being "nice." But I've learned that boundaries aren't about rejection—they're about clarity. They're not a way of shutting people out; they're a way of keeping myself grounded and connected.

In this episode, I share why it's so hard to say no, what our early attachment patterns have to do with it, and how we can begin to change that story. Many of us—especially women —were conditioned to be accommodating, pleasing, and available. But constantly saying yes doesn't make us generous; it makes us exhausted.

I'll walk you through a few of my favorite tools and gentle language swaps to make "no" feel a little lighter, including:

• "Thank you for thinking of me, but I can't commit right now."

• "I don't have the capacity, but here's another option."

• "No, thank you." (Yes, that's a full sentence!)

I also talk about one of my favorite practices: treating boundaries as an act of self-partnership. I imagine my past and future self as teammates. The version of me from three days ago who blocked out time on the calendar, made lunch plans at home, or said no to something that would've drained me—she was taking care of me. And the me right now? I'm doing the same for the future version who'll thank me later.

Boundaries aren't punishment; they're protection. And when I honor my energy first, I can show up more fully for the things and people that truly matter.

If you've ever felt the pressure to do it all, to say yes to every request, or to overexplain your "no," I hope this episode feels like permission to breathe again. Saying no with kindness and calm is one of the most loving things we can do—for ourselves and for everyone around us.

Resources Mentioned: – The Treasure Journal: A 7-part guided journal and meditation series to help you reset before burnout sets in. – Wrestling a Walrus: For Little People with Big Feelings: A playful tool for helping kids (and grown-ups) name and navigate big emotions with compassion.

• FREE mediation download

Connect with Danielle:

• Watch the show on YouTube

• Instagram

If this conversation helps you take one deep breath or say one kinder no, share it with a friend who might need the same reminder. Because you deserve calm—without having to earn it.

"If Plan A is meaningful enough, there should not be a Plan B and a Plan C."

Martha Hoover joins me for a wide-ranging, candid convo on vision, hospitality, change, and unapologetically starting your "second rodeo." We talk about building something distinctive, even if the world isn't ready for it, parenting and businesses growing up like "twins," learning to say "no", and why perfection is a trap. Martha shares stories—from sexism at the bank to learning stick shift in one afternoon—that show how courage, clarity, and follow-through beat "shoulda-coulda-woulda" every time.

In this episode, we cover:

• Hospitality is its own "superpower": making people feel truly welcomed in your sacred spaces

• Creating what you wanted—and trusting others want it, too

• Change as the only constant (and how to lean into it)

• Energy budgeting: non-negotiables, boundaries, and saying no without guilt

• Parenting, business, and growth on parallel timelines

• Ageism, relevance, and launching a "Second Rodeo" in your 70s

• Failing with joy, learning publicly, and persisting without a Plan B

3 Key Takeaways

1. Define and defend your non-negotiables. Write them down, communicate them, and hold them—because expectations go both ways.

2. Change isn't the enemy—resistance is. Treat pivots as progress: if something doesn't work, you've learned… and you can change again.

3. Commit to Plan A. When the goal matters, ditch the escape hatches. Commitment calms the noise and focuses your energy.

Links & Mentions

• Martha Hoover on Instagram
• Martha's MSH Collective: helping women thrive in life and business
• A Longer Table (Formerly known as the Patachou Foundation)

• The Mother Load by Sarah Hoover (audiobook recommended)

• "Learning How to Surf" short film (Hurley) — a blueprint for learning anything

Connect with Danielle:

• Watch the show on YouTube

• Instagram

• The Treasured Journal

• Wrestling a Walrus

If this episode made you braver about your next chapter, share it with a friend and subscribe, so you don't miss the next conversation.

Stress symptoms you've been brushing off aren't flaws—they're messages. In this Don't Cut Your Own Bangs mini-series - Put Down the Panic: A Kinder Guide to Stress, therapist Danielle Ireland, walks through the quiet ways stress shows up (jaw clenching, gut flutters, broken sleep) and how a few gentle shifts can keep those whispers from turning into burnout—perfect timing as the holidays approach.

Here's the heart of it: your body is a messenger, not a problem. "The way your body is responding to stress is not failure—it is information." You also can't outrun stress—"Suppressed stress doesn't vanish." High thresholds only delay the crash. The good news? Tiny things work. A one-minute body-scan, a short walk or stretch, and a slow, deep breath can reset more than you think when you do them consistently.

Want ideas you can try today? Do a quick head-to-toe scan to notice tension, add a few minutes of gentle movement, and breathe slowly—simple box breathing (4-4-4-4) if that helps. These aren't grand gestures; they're steady, doable practices that add up.

Resources • The Treasured Journal (7-part guided journal + meditations) • Wrestling a Walrus For Little People with Big Feelings

• Watch the show on YouTube

• follow on Instagram

Stick around to the end for a reminder you'll want on repeat—and subscribe so you don't miss the final episode of this mini-series (there's a special audio-only gift inside). If this helped, a quick like, subscribe, and review helps more people find calm.

00:00 Why small signals matter

02:20 Common stress signs

08:50 Why we minimize

12:20 Hustle

In this week's episode of Don't Cut Your Own Bangs, I sit down with the radiant and insightful Angie Arkin — an internationally known intuitive healer and psychic channel whose work has guided clients around the world.

Angie and I talk about what it means to trust your intuition, how to distinguish between the critical inner voice and the deeper truth inside of you, and why healing often begins by simply asking, "What do I need right now?"

Whether you're brand-new to the world of energy work or already well on your way in your spiritual practice, this conversation offers gentle entry points, grounded wisdom, and plenty of heart. Plus, Angie shares a don't cut your own bangs moment you won't forget — complete with dolphins and a near-miss with a shark! 🐬🦈

1. Intuition is a muscle.

"Our intuition is literally always talking to us, but it's like a radio station we may or may not be used to tuning into."

Like any muscle, the more you practice listening to your intuition, the stronger and clearer it becomes.

2. The truth feels good — even when it's hard.

"The truth always feels peaceful in the body. If it feels heavy, critical, or defensive, that's not the truth."

A big aha may also come with an "oh no, now I have to face this," but the body recognizes truth as relief and clarity.

3. Healing begins with self-trust.

"I never want to know more about someone than they want to know about themselves. My role is to help them walk through the door they're already willing to open."

Real empowerment happens when you learn to trust your own knowing — not outsource it entirely to someone else.

Connect with Angie:

https://angiearkin.com/

RATE, REVIEW, SUBSCRIBE TO "DON'T CUT YOUR OWN BANGS"

Like your favorite recipe or song, the best things in life are shared. When you rate, review, and subscribe to this podcast, your engagement helps me connect with other listeners just like you. Plus, subscriptions just make life easier for everybody. It's one less thing for you to think about and you can easily keep up to date on everything that's new. So, please rate, review, and subscribe today.

DANIELLE IRELAND, LCSW

I greatly appreciate your support and engagement as part of the Don't Cut Your Own Bangs community. Feel free to reach out with questions, comments, or anything you'd like to share. You can connect with me at any of the links below.

Connect with Danielle:

• Watch the show on YouTube

• Instagram

• The Treasured Journal

• Wrestling a Walrus

Burnout doesn't just wear you out physically—it scrambles your thoughts, blurs your focus, and leaves you feeling lost in life. Even on days when "nothing big" happened, you can still feel completely drained, overstimulated, and like you're drowning emotionally.

In this solo episode of Don't Cut Your Own Bangs, I share a personal story of navigating one of those days when the noise of burnout got way too loud—and the small but powerful shifts that helped me reclaim clarity and calm.

This conversation is part of my Put Down the Panic: A Kinder Guide to Stress mini-series, created to help you lower the volume on burnout, quiet the noise, and make space to hear your own voice again.

1. Overstimulation fuels burnout more than we realize. "It's so easy for overstimulation to fuel the burnout we're trying to avoid."

Our brains weren't built for nonstop notifications, interruptions, and mental multitasking. Recognizing overstimulation is the first step toward recovery.

2. Tiny resets create big clarity. "One little notch down in the volume makes it that much easier for you to hear yourself—the truth of your own experience."

Even a one-minute pause or a few minutes of "sensory white space" without screens can help you reset and reconnect.

3. Rest and repair are not weaknesses. "The break I gave myself didn't reinvigorate me—it repaired me. And that was exactly what I needed."

Repair days protect you from deeper burnout. They're just as valuable as days when you feel fully energized.

• The Treasure Journal – a 7-part guided journal and meditation series → The Treasured Journal

• Wrestling a Walrus: For Little People with Big Feelings – my children's book to help kids (and adults) navigate emotions → Wrestling a Walrus

  • Watch the show on YouTube

  • Instagram

If you've been feeling lost in life or thinking, "I feel like I'm drowning emotionally," I hope this episode offers you a breath of fresh air and a gentle reminder: you don't have to earn your peace—it's waiting for you in the pause.

Don't forget to subscribe to Don't Cut Your Own Bangs wherever you listen to podcasts, and share this episode with someone who might need a moment of calm today.