For the first half of my marriage, I tried to get my wife to be like me.

I always thought I was right. I liked to be in charge and make all of the decisions. I made her think she had to get approval from me to do anything.

It was the same way at work. I pushed people around and told them what to do. However, whenever someone told me what to do, I was emotionally affected.

Eventually, I realized that my attitude was creating the same problem at work as it was at home. People didn’t like or trust me. I had to learn to let people be themselves.

If you’re someone who’s afraid of being judged, always criticizing others, and living in a tumultuous environment, reflect. Honestly consider if you are the problem—because you probably are.

As soon as you understand and get honest about what’s happening, you can start to figure out how to fix it.

For me, that meant going to leadership seminars. It meant telling people the outcome I needed and then stepping back. It meant ensuring that the people around me knew I trusted them. It meant learning to let go and, as a result, coming home less stressed.

Listen to this episode for more instruction on changing your culture, both at home and at work. You may just find a transformation.