Curious Leadership with Dominic Monkhouse

E304 | Deescalating Conflicts: The Power of Effective Communication with David Dye & Karin Hurt


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Summary

One of Dominic's favourite recordings yet! The conversation with Karin Hurt and David Dye explores the topic of workplace conflict and the importance of having productive conversations. They discuss the fear and discomfort associated with conflict, the need for connection, clarity, curiosity, and commitment in resolving conflicts, and the power of using specific phrases to initiate and navigate these conversations. The conversation emphasises the positive aspects of conflict and the potential for growth and innovation that can result from addressing conflicts effectively. In this conversation, David Dye and Karin Hurt discuss the importance of de-escalating conflicts in the workplace and providing strategies for effective communication. They emphasise the power of phrases like 'tell me more' and 'I'm curious' to break the cycle of conflict and create a safe space for dialogue. They also highlight the significance of acknowledging emotions and using check-ins for understanding to ensure that everyone feels heard. The conversation explores the benefits of teams that handle conflict well, such as fostering innovation and creating a united front. David and Karin share personal anecdotes and recommend books like 'Tribes' by Seth Godin and '4000 Weeks' by Oliver Burkeman.

Keywords

workplace conflict, productive conversations, connection, clarity, curiosity, commitment, phrases, conflict resolution, workplace communication, deescalating conflicts, effective dialogue, acknowledging emotions, understanding, team dynamics, innovation, collaboration, leadership

Takeaways

  • Conflict is not inherently negative; it is a difference of perspective that can lead to innovation and problem-solving.
  • Having productive conversations about conflicts requires connection, clarity, curiosity, and commitment.
  • Initiating conversations about conflicts can be uncomfortable, but it is necessary for growth and improvement.
  • Using powerful phrases, such as 'Tell me more' and 'What would a successful outcome do for you?', can facilitate productive conversations about conflicts.
  • Conflict resolution requires understanding and addressing all parties' underlying needs and motivations. Use phrases like 'tell me more' and 'I'm curious' to deescalate conflicts and create a safe space for dialogue.
  • Acknowledge emotions and use check-ins for understanding to ensure that everyone feels heard.
  • Teams that handle conflict well foster innovation and have a united front.
  • Effective communication and collaboration are essential for successful conflict resolution.
  • Recommended books: 'Tribes' by Seth Godin and '4000 Weeks' by Oliver Burkeman.

Chapters

(02:59) The Need for Productive Conflict Conversations

(09:04) Connection and Clarity in Conflict Resolution

(13:38) Curiosity and Commitment in Addressing Conflict

(16:24) Using Powerful Phrases to Navigate Conflict Conversations

(24:04) Deescalating Conflicts: The Power of Effective Communication

(27:27) Creating a Safe Space for Dialogue: Strategies for Conflict Resolution

(29:29) The Benefits of Teams that Handle Conflict Well

(31:47) Innovation and Collaboration: The Role of Conflict in Driving Change

(36:37) War Stories: Examples of Conflict Resolution

(42:18) The Importance of Psychological Safety and Challenging the Status Quo

(46:38) Unpopular Opinions and Worst Business Advice

Mentioned in this episode:

Get Mind Your F**king Business

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