Welcome to Elevator Systems! This episode explores all of the complexities of when families combine in stepfamily relationships and how Bowen family systems theory can be a resource. Kathleen Cotter Cauley is back on the elevator, sharing her thoughts and experiences with Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White.

Kathleen Cotter Cauley is a licensed marriage and family therapist and has a private practice in both Virginia and Florida. She’s a faculty member of the Bowen Center and was involved in founding the Florida Family Research Network. Her thinking on triangles has been published in the book “Triangles: Bowen Family Systems Perspectives” by Peter Titelman. Kathleen has been married for almost 40 years, is a stepmom, a stepdaughter, and a grandma. 

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Stepfamilies provide a unique opportunity to apply Bowen family systems theory to the complex dynamics
• Managing anxiety and working on self-differentiation are important in navigating stepfamily challenges
• Understanding the roles and expectations for each member of a stepfamily can help in managing transition and integration processes
• The importance of curiosity about each family member's perspective and experience
• The useful framework of the family diagram and family history 
• Examples include: personal experience and Hollywood examples including the movie “Stepmom”, the classic “wicked stepmother", and “The Brady Bunch”

For anyone who is connected to a blended family. This episode offers a unique perspective and framework to think through and manage the complex dynamics of stepfamily life. 

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 
• Monica McGoldrick & Betty Carter: The Family Life Cycle
• Roberta Gilbert, “On Stepparenting” Family Systems Forum, Winter 2009, Vol 10 No4

• Dr. Daniel Papero: Developing A Systems Model for Family Assessment
• Kathleen Smith: The Cycle of Overfunctioning and Distance
• Family Matters: Navigating the Blended Family Maze
• Peter Titelman, Ed: Triangles: Bowen Family Systems Theory Perspectives

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Marriage #Remarriage #Divorce #Death #Widow #BlendedFamily #Stepfamily #Stepparent #Stepchild #FamilyChallenges #Challenges #Complexity #StepfamilyLife #TherapyPodcast #Anxiety #MentalHealth #Relationships #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! Today’s episode discusses divorce from a Bowen family systems theory perspective. Dr. Carrie Collier is back thinking alongside hosts Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White.

Dr. Carrie Collier is a researcher, lecturer and family therapist specializing in Bowen family systems theory. She earned her PhD in Counsellor Education and has over 25 years of study and practice as a Licensed Professional Counsellor. She is on the faculty of The Bowen Center where she serves on the Board of Directors and was Director for two years. She published and validated a Family Unit Functioning Questionnaire used by therapists and researchers to gather information about families. Her most recent research on the language of nature in Murray Bowen's archival papers can be found in The Australian and New Zealand Journal of Family Therapy.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• The usefulness of knowing family history and family patterns of functioning in marriage and divorce and how divorce can intensify patterns.

• Understanding one's role in the family and how divorce can be an opportunity for personal growth and redefining relationships within the family system.
• How the intensity of emotional fusion in a marriage can mirror the intensity of separation during divorce.
• The resource of a coach or therapist for individuals to think through their functioning in the family.
• Family leaders who maintain open communication, clear thinking and connections with both parties in a divorce can positively influence the broader family system.
  

This episode is recommended for people and professionals who are navigating divorce.

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 
• Dr. Murray Bowen: Family Therapy in Clinical Practice
• Monica McGoldrick & Betty Carter: The Family Life Cycle
• Roberta Gilbert: Extraordinary Relationships
• Edward Beal: “Child-Focused Divorce” in Clinical Applications of Bowen Family Systems Theory (Ed. Peter Titelman)
• Family Matters: Divorce and Adult Children
• Dr. Carrie Collier: The Language of Nature in Murray Bowen’s Writings

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Marriage #Remarriage #Divorce #BlendedFamily #Stepfamily #Partner #Conflict #Mediation #Separation #FamilyChallenges #Challenges #Complexity #TherapyPodcast #Anxiety #Intensity #Patterns #MentalHealth #Relationships #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk

Welcome to Elevator Systems! In this episode we are looking at a Bowen family systems theory perspective on relationships with kids with challenges. Joining hosts Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White is fellow Living Systems colleague Devana Weiss who brings personal and professional experience to this topic.

Devana Weiss is a licensed counsellor in private practise, a clinical supervisor, and a faculty member with Living Systems. She has been studying and practicing Bowen family systems theory for almost 20 years. She is married and a mother to three children, one of whom has developmental disabilities. She has lived experience navigating the medical and school systems and enjoys assisting parents and caregivers who face similar challenges. 

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• The impact that worry has on a child with challenges and their relationships
• The importance of recognizing what is within one’s control as a parent and responding with steadiness, clear thinking and guiding principles during tough times
• The pattern of over and under-functioning and how Bowen theory is useful for assessing facts and needs and what kind of help is helpful
• The role of siblings and the whole family system in managing challenge
• Examples include: an analogy from a garden, the movie CODA, dinner time struggles, and how parents and professionals can manage their own anxiety

For any professional, family member, or friend in relationship with a child with a challenge, this episode offers a unique perspective on what it means to be a resource. 

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 

• Catherine M. Rakow: Making Sense of Human Life
• Dr. Michael E. Kerr: Bowen Theory’s Secrets (epilogue chapter)
• Parent Hope Project specific episodes:

• Being a Lighthouse
• How the Worry Cycle Plays Out in Schools
  Special Needs Children

• Co-Regulation or Self-Regulation in Parenting
  

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Parenting #Parents #Children #Kids #KidswithChallenges #SpecialNeeds #Disability #Help #Inclusion #Challenges #Resources #Helpfulness #Worry #CODAmovie #TherapyPodcast #Neurotypical #Neurodivergent #Anxiety #MentalHealth #Relationships #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! Today Lauren Errington joins hosts Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White as we think about parenting from a Bowen family systems perspective.

Lauren Errington is the Executive Director of the Family Systems Institute in Sydney, Australia. She is also a Mental Health Social Worker and Clinical Family Therapist and Supervisor at the Family Systems Practice. She has written articles on the application of Bowen of theory in family therapy for multiple journals including co-authoring a soon to be published article for the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy. Lauren is married and a parent of three school-aged children.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• A parent’s effort to manage their own reactivity and provide kids developmental space
• Differentiation of self, balancing individuality and togetherness, in parenting
• Getting clear on one’s own parenting beliefs and values amid the many perspectives and pressures in parenting today
• How viewing the family as a system can help parents manage challenges by understanding multi-generational patterns
• The importance of humour and flexibility for parents to step back and see situations from a different perspective
• Examples: the humorous side of emotion coaching, the movie Parenthood, parenting in other species, and thinking through “taking off the training wheels” at different stages 

This episode is for parents, anyone who works with parents, and anyone who has parents! 

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 
• Parent Hope Project podcast and resources
• Dr Jenny Brown: Confident Parenting
• Roberta Gilbert: Extraordinary Relationships
• Australian and New Zealand Journal of Family Therapy (Vol 45, Issue 2), Special Issue: Bowen Family Systems Theory
• White, Errington and Ruggier, “Promoting Parent Agency Across the World through the Parent Hope Project: The Difference Bowen Family Systems Theory Makes”, Journal of Marital and Family Therapy - in revision. 

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Parenting #Parents #Parenthood #Children #Kids #ChildDevelopment #Development #Help #Resources #Helpfulness #Individuality #TherapyPodcast #Anxiety #MentalHealth #Relationships #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! This episode looks at Bowen family systems theory and marriage. Joining Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White is Phil Klever who has spent over two decades doing research on married couples.

Phil Klever has applied Bowen theory in his clinical practice and his personal life over most of his adult life. He has tested Bowen theory hypotheses in his longitudinal family research study. He is a member of Dr. Daniel Papero's postgraduate research seminar, the Bowen theory Journal Club, and the Bowen Center's Research Committee.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Observing fusion in marriage and the balance of being both a separate and connected person is central in maintaining maturity in marriage
• The influence of the multi-generational family on marriage 
• Thinking through relationship patterns: conflict, distance, triangles, and over and under-functioning
• Keeping a broad perspective of influences on marriage
• Examples: the classic approach/avoid pattern, a personal example of meeting the in-laws, and “The Story of Us”.

Couples and counsellors alike will gain insights to how Bowen theory can inform one’s understanding of the marriage relationship.

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 
• Dr. Ronald Richardson: Family Ties that Bind
• Dr. Jenny Brown: Growing Yourself Up
• Peg Donley interview 
• Donley, M (2016) “Bonding and Babies: The Evolution of Biparental Care and The Primary Triangle”, Family Systems, 12,1.
• Phil Klever Research:

Chapters:

• 1998. “Marital Fusion and Differentiation.” In Titelman (Ed.) Clinical Applications of Bowen Family Systems Theory
• 2003. “Marital Functioning and Multigenerational Fusion and Cutoff.” In Titelman (Ed.), Emotional Cutoff
• 2008. “Triangles in Marriage.” In Titelman (Ed.), Triangles: Bowen Family Systems Theory Perspectives
• 2014. “Applying Differentiation of Self in One’s Family.” In Titelman (Ed.), Differentiation of Self
• 2020. “The Primary Triangle and Variation in Family Functioning.” In Keller and Noone (Ed.), Handbook of Bowen Family Systems Theory and Research Methods
• 2020. “The Multigenerational Transmission of Family Unit Functioning.” In Keller and Noone (Ed.), Handbook of Bowen Family Systems Theory and Research Methods

Articles:

• 2018. “Goal Effectiveness and Family Functioning.” The American Journal of Family Therapy 46: 195-212
• 2021. “Divergent Spouse Functioning.” Family Systems 14: 103-130.
• 2023. “Similarity in Spouse Functioning.” Family Systems 17.2: 139-165
• 2025. “Child Focus and the Family Unit: A Comparison of Families with Lower and Higher Child Symptomology.” Family Systems 19, 2: 105-133.

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more here

Key Topics:#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Marriage #Couples #MarriageDynamics #FamilyofOrigin #FamilyHistory #MultiGenerational #TheStoryofUsMovie #TherapyPodcast #MentalHealth #Relationships #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! Today we are riding the elevator at our places of work. Jake Morrill joins hosts Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White to look at the many ways a Bowen family systems lens can be useful in the everyday, big and small situations and challenges of work life.

Jake Morrill is the founder of Generation to Generation Leadership Coaching, which works with family businesses, congregations, and nonprofits. A longtime student of Bowen Theory, he’s on the faculty of the Bowen Center for the Study of the Family, where he’s one of the teachers of the course, “Differentiation at Work.” 

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Differentiation of self at work and the usefulness of a "this is me, who are you?” posture
• Over and under-functioning and finding balance in your role in work dynamics 
• Professionalism vs. pseudo self and leading with personal integrity in the midst of external pressures
• The importance of one-to-one communication and open, curious conversations
• Defining work roles while considering personal values and family commitments
• Real life examples from middle management, consulting in challenging situations, and finding a work/life balance

For anyone at any level in the work world. This episode will offer insight into how work systems function and how to manage you! 

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 

• Dr. Murray Bowen: Family Therapy in Clinical Practice 
• Jake Morrill: The Boundaries Workbook
• Leslie Ann Fox & Katherine Gratwick-Baker: Leading a Business in Anxious Times
• Kathleen Smith: Everything Isn’t Terrible
• The Anxious Achiever podcast: How Family Dynamics Play Out at Work
• The Anxious Achiever podcast: Is People Pleasing Hurting Your Career?
• Ruth Riley Sagar and Kathleen Klaus Wiseman, Ed: Understanding Organizations

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:
#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Work #Leadership #Management #Career #Boundaries #Balance #Triangles #Professional #TherapyPodcast #MentalHealth #Relationships #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! Therapist Joe Berger joins Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White to think about how Bowen family systems theory is useful in the dating world. 

Joe Berger is a therapist who works with individuals, couples, and families and previously worked for several years in community mental health. He received a Masters in Social Work from the University of Vermont in 2012, and has completed two years of postgraduate training at the Bowen Center in Washington. He is currently a faculty member at the Vermont Center for Family Studies.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• A Bowen theory approach to dating emphasizes focusing on oneself rather than the other person
• Being clear about one's goals and guidelines in dating helps maintain authenticity and self-awareness
• The influence of societal and familial expectations on dating behaviours and relationship choices
• Keeping a sense of fun and curiosity is important in the dating process, alongside serious considerations
• Examples shared from personal experience, clinical cases, and the entertainment world
  

Counsellors, parents, and anyone navigating the dating world will find useful ideas for further thinking in this episode.

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 

• Dr. Jenny Brown: Growing Yourself Up
• Dr Ronald Richardson: Jane Austen’s Guide to Good Relationships
• Dr Kathleen Smith: Everything Isn’t Terrible
• Avrum Nadigel: Learning to Commit
• Avrum Nadigel: It Takes More than Love
• Esther Perel: Mating in Captivity 

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:
#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Dating #Couples #AuthenticDating #RelationshipInsights #RelationshipGoals #Single #Love #Marriage #BeingLiked #Monogamy #Polyamory #Divorce #TherapyPodcast #MentalHealth #Relationships #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! In this episode we delve into the complexities of adolescence through the lens of Bowen family systems theory. Join hosts Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White with guest Avrum Nadigel as they explore how understanding family dynamics can illuminate the challenges and opportunities of the teenage years. 

Avrum Nadigel has been a marriage and family therapist for 25 years and has completed postgraduate training in Bowen family systems theory. He is the author of three book: “Learning to Commit”, “It Takes More than Love” and “Where Would you Like to Start: A Master Therapist on Beginning Psychotherapy with Families”. Avrum has co-produced two podcasts: “Pop Parenting” and “The Love Examined Playlist”.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Bowen family systems theory’s unique perspective on adolescence: thinking about a teenager within the broader context of the family
• How multi-generational processes and family history impact adolescent behavior and development
• The concept of differentiation and how teens strive to form their own identities while balancing family expectation and outside influence
• The significant role parents play in their adolescent's development
• Practical advice for supporting growth, individuality and connection for the family

• Examples include: every John Hughes movie, music, sports, peer pressure, and summer camp

This episode is for professionals, parents, teens or anyone navigating this pivotal stage of life. Tune in to discover how systems thinking is useful in adolescence.

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 

• Family Matters, Surviving the Teen Years
• Avrum Nadigel: Learning to Commit
• Avrum Nadigel: It Takes More than Love
• Avrum Nadigel: Where Would you Like to Start: A Master Therapist on Beginning Psychotherapy with Families
• Dr. Ron Richardson: Family Ties that Bind
• Dr. Daniel J. Siegel: Brainstorm
• Dr. Kathleen Smith: True to You by

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Adolescence #Adolescents #Teens #Teenager #Growth #Development #PeerPressure #Expectations #JohnHughes #TheBreakfastClub #TherapyPodcast #MentalHealth #Relationships #DifferentiationOfSelf #Differentiation #BowenTheory #ElevatorSystems #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! In Season 3 Episode 3 Kathleen Cotter Cauley joins Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White on the elevator to look at the role of pets in relationships — from cats and dogs to triangles and anxiety!

Kathleen Cotter Cauley is a licensed marriage and family therapist and has a private practice in both Virginia and Florida. She’s a faculty member of the Bowen Center and was involved in founding the Florida Family Research Network. She has worked with guide dogs for over 30 years.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Viewing pets as active participants in the emotional field
• How animals reflect family anxiety and calm
• The concept of reciprocity in human-animal relationships
• The four patterns of reactivity (conflict, distance, projection, triangles) observed in pets
• How pet entries and exits impact family dynamics
• Examples from guide dogs, breeders, and meet our own pets!

Whether you're new to Bowen Theory or a long-time learner, this episode offers surprising, insightful ways to observe functioning through your pets, watch anxiety move, and deepen your understanding of family systems.

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 

• Alan Entin: Pets in the Family
• Dr. Murray Bowen: Family Therapy in Clinical Practice 
• Dr. Michael Kerr: “Family Systems Theory and Therapy” in A. Gurman & D. Kniskern (Eds.), Handbook of family therapy. 

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment about what you’ve noticed in your own pet relationships.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:
#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #PetsAndPeople #EmotionalSystems #AnxietyInFamilies #Reciprocity #Triangles #PetTherapy #DifferentiationOfSelf #GuideDogs #CatsAndDogs #EmotionalRegulation #TherapyPodcast #MentalHealth #EmotionalMaturity #Differentiation #Relationships #BowenTheory #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #TherapyPodcast #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.

Welcome to Elevator Systems! In Season 3 Episode 2 hosts Dixie Vandersluys and Katie White are joined by special guest Dr. Guillermo Cancio-Bello to talk about the many aspects and facets of friendship from a Bowen family systems perspective.

Dr. Guillermo Cancio-Bello is an Assistant Professor of Counseling at Barry University and integrates Bowen theory into his clinical, academic, research, and organizational work. His teaching and scholarship focus on systems thinking, leadership development, and the personal and professional growth of counsellors-in-training. Guillermo currently serves as President of the Florida Association of Marriage and Family Counseling (FAMFC) and is also a board member of the Florida Family Research Network, which works to advance the science of human behavior based on the natural systems theory of the family developed by Murray Bowen.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode:

• Differentiation (staying connected and separate) in friendship
• The role of sibling position in friend selection
• Fusion, triangles, and anxiety
• How family of origin impacts adult relationships
• Bowen theory insights on digital vs. in-person connections
• Examples from the biblical friendship of David & Jonathan to sending memes! 

For counsellors or anyone interested in understanding relationships better, this discussion will get you curious about how you show up in your friendships.

Terms you don’t understand? We have episodes on all 8 concepts of Bowen theory and other ideas in Elevator Systems Seasons 1 & 2.

Recommended Resources:

• The Murray Bowen Archives Project 

• The Relationships We Live In podcast: https://rss.com/podcasts/episode-1-the-relationships-we-live-in/
• The Anxious Overachiever newsletter
• Dr Ronald Richardson: Jane Austen’s Guide to Good Relationships
• Dr Kathleen Smith: Everything Isn’t Terrible
• Dr Roberta Gilbert: Extraordinary Relationships
• Dr. Robin Dunbar’s loneliness research

New podcast episodes released every Tuesday this season—stay tuned as we explore relationships across the lifespan! 

Subscribe on YouTube, Spotify, or Apple Podcasts so you don’t miss a weekly release.

Don’t forget to like, subscribe, and comment about how systems thinking is useful in your own friendships.

Living Systems Counselling and Training provides educational material for those interested in learning more about Bowen family systems theory: https://livingsystems.ca

Living Systems Hybrid Conference: October 17–18, 2025

Conference theme: Aging—Individual Challenge or Family Opportunity?

Learn more: https://livingsystems.ca/education/conferences/fall-2025-conference-on-aging/

Key Topics:
#BowenFamilySystems #LivingSystems #MurrayBowen #Therapy #SystemsThinking #Family #Friendship #TherapyPodcast #MentalHealth #EmotionalMaturity #Differentiation #Relationships #BowenTheory #FamilySystemsTheory #ElevatorSystemsPodcast #TherapyPodcast #LifeSpan #MurrayBowenArchives #TMBAP #TheMurrayBowenArchivesProject

DISCLAIMER: This podcast is general information about Bowen family systems theory and is not considered the practice of counselling or therapy.  The information presented are the views of the people who say them. Any information used from this podcast is used at your own risk.