Emotional intelligence includes understanding that emotions can be primary or secondary. Recognizing this will help you to be less emotionally reactive in your relationships. Many in dysfunctional, toxic relationships struggle with identifying what causes their emotional reactivity, especially when past triggers contribute and intensify the responses. 

The more you understand about your emotions, the easier it will be to make sense of them. It is crucial that you can trace the links between other people's actions and your emotions.  This includes identifying why you are upset and what feelings come first and second. This will also increase your awareness of what is going on in the other person's feelings and reactions.

Watch this video to increase your emotional intelligence.    

Karla Downing's passion is to see individuals, marriages, and families set free from dysfunction, scriptural misunderstanding, and emotional pain personally and relationally. Her Christian relationship advice includes messages, books, and classes that provide practical solutions grounded in biblical truths, bringing balance and clarity to life and relationship issues. She also desires to equip ministry leaders and counselors to reach out more effectively to those struggling with difficult relationships, including abuse.

Watch this video on YouTube: https://youtu.be/Z2NJCg3otYc