mind you

Ep 102: Comparison - How to do it Differently


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Comparison is something we all do — often without even realising it. Whether it’s about looks, parenting, achievements, or lifestyle, we constantly measure ourselves against others. But comparison doesn’t just steal our joy; it can fuel shame, perfectionism, and even take us off track from living in alignment with our own values.

In this episode, I unpack:

  • Why comparison is such a natural human instinct (hello, social comparison theory and evolutionary survival).

  • The link between comparison and our unbearable feelings — those emotions we most want to avoid.

  • How meaning-making turns innocent observations into painful self-criticism.

  • Practical ways to rewire your brain so comparison becomes a tool for growth, kindness, and clarity.

  • Real-life stories of learning from others rather than spiralling into “not enough.”

  • The hidden costs of comparison — to your identity, relationships, mental health, and spiritual life.

  • Why imperfection and authenticity are actually your biggest strengths.

If you’ve ever resonated with the phrase “comparison is the thief of joy” but wondered how to actually stop do it differently, this conversation is for you.

🎧 Listen in, and discover how to turn comparison around for good — into an opportunity to learn, clarify your values, and treat yourself with gentleness.

💬 Want to go deeper? After this episode, check out:

  • Overcoming Perfectionism (one of the most downloaded episodes)

  • The Self-Esteem Episode

  • Unbearable Feelings

Let’s make comparison kinder — and find more joy in being who you really are.

Follow me on Instagram ⁠@charlottethecounsellor⁠ or visit ⁠charlottecummings.nz⁠ for free resources.

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mind youBy Charlotte Cummings

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