Two Plus Two: The Swinger Podcast for Couples

Ep 49: The Lifestyle Flake Factor: Ghosting, Excuses, and Awkward Truths


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In this week’s episode, hosts Zack, Josie, Brad, and Brittany dive into one of the most universally frustrating parts of the lifestyle: communication… or the lack of it. From last-minute confirmations that never come to couples who keep others dangling “just in case,” the crew unpacks the subtle (and not-so-subtle) ways poor communication can waste time, strain friendships, and complicate connections.

They explore why it feels so disrespectful when couples make plans but go silent when it’s time to confirm, and how annoying it is when someone breaks a commitment and then disappears—only to ask you to suggest a new time and never respond. The hosts also share their collective experience with a notoriously flaky couple whose repeated excuses have become a running theme in their local community.

The conversation moves into whether people owe each other explanations when interest fades, or whether being honest only invites unnecessary drama. They also examine the sting of being ghosted by close friends, and the gray area where “ghosting” isn’t so clear—especially in a dynamic with multiple people, mismatched levels of interest, or partners who aren’t on the same page.

Ultimately, the group acknowledges what everyone secretly knows: the lifestyle is awkward, interest is complicated, and communication between couples is hard. But understanding how these behaviors affect others—and recognizing the subjectivity of what counts as ghosting—can make navigating it all just a little easier.


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(00:00:00) The sizzle fizzle

(00:02:23) The times when we’ve flaked or ghosted

(00:04:02) Communication is great….then crickets!

(00:05:55) Ranting about coordinating with people who are traveling

(00:14:00) Speculating on why people may flake or ghost

(00:16:34) Letting people know you’re not interested so they don’t wonder

(00:17:42) A local couple with a reputation for expressing interest and not following through

(00:22:24) The local lifestyle scene

(00:26:38) Another rant about a gh  osting scenario

(00:29:12) Being honest about your true interest

(00:31:00) Texting etiquette

(00:34:26) When too much time passes between responses

(00:38:00) Challenges in identifying and connecting with couples online

(00:40:25) How honest should you be when breaking plans?

(00:43:18) When friends ghost you

(00:48:28) Ghosting is subjective and may not always be a bad thing

(00:51:58) Be kind, honest, direct, respectful and don’t string people along


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Two Plus Two: The Swinger Podcast for CouplesBy Zack, Josie, Brad, Brittany

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