The Best of You

Episode 100: I Shouldn’t Feel Betrayed By Someone I Trust—How to Grieve, Breathe, & Receive in the Wake of Broken Trust with Steve Carter


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Have you ever felt betrayed by someone you thought you could trust?

It's a deeply painful experience that can leave you questioning not only the betrayer but also your own judgment. Trust, once broken, seems almost impossible to rebuild.

My guest today, Steve Carter, experienced a series of profound betrayals at a pivotal moment in his life. In 2018, amidst misconduct allegations against Bill Hybels, founder of Willow Creek Community Church, Steve made the difficult decision to step down from his role as a newly minted lead pastor—a position he once considered his dream job. Shortly thereafter, he faced yet another personal betrayal by his own parents.

Reeling from the loss of his job, his dream, and his trust in those closest to him, Steve entered a desert season guided by three words he sensed God gave to him: Grieve. Breathe. Receive. Steve's journey through loss is so powerful, so honest, and so deeply healing. Please do not miss this conversation!

Here’s what we cover:

  • 2 essential ingredients for trust (12:40)
  • Why grief is the antidote to cynicism (22:28)
  • Confronting our attraction to patterns of narcissism (28:08)
  • The anger high vs. the peace of forgiveness (36:25)
  • How he hangs on to his love for the church (34:03)
  • Purchase Grieve, Breathe, Receive by Steve Carter here.

    Find a full transcript and list of resources from this episode here.

    Related Episodes:

    Episode 97: I Shouldn't Feel This Anxious—Insights on Trauma & Healing with Monique Koven

    Episode 98: I Shouldn’t Feel Alone in My Grief—Why Your Grief Matters & the #1 Most Important Support For Those Who Are Grieving with J.S. Park

    Episode 99: I Shouldn’t Feel Like My Spirit is Broken—Exploring a Broken Spirit & the Dark Night of the Soul with Christopher Cook


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    • Music by Andy Luiten

      Sound editing by Kelly Kramarik

      While Dr. Cook is a counselor, the content of this podcast and any of the products provided by Dr. Cook are not specific counseling advice nor are they a substitute for individual counseling. The content and products provided on this podcast are for informational purposes only.

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