What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• We are often disappointed when the people we are dating don’t meet our expectations, but we have to surrender to the process and realize we are not entitled to have them follow our unwritten rules.
• Lisa sees many parallels with the 12 Step Program and the dating process.
• What does it mean to surrender to the process?  Knowing that we can’t control every aspect or outcome, incompatibility does not equal failure, and resistance is counterintuitive.
• Trusting the process can be scary, but there is no other way to gain wisdom and experience without going through it.
• We can’t let the voice of insecurity or pride write our stories; our attitude and our reactions can change the entire outcome.
• It’s important to remember the dating process is a journey.  Have you thought about why you are dating?
• Our best version of ourselves will attract the best people; acting with authenticity and genuinely from the heart is the only approach.
• Every single person can benefit from the perspective of a third party mentor or coach to help them grow.
• Investing in dating will pay out in dividends in so many facets of life from adding years to your lifespan, increasing your income level, and more.

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Mentioned:

Serenity Prayer

Watch Lisa’s Presentation

Quotes

• “The opposite of surrender is not to let go of control.  It’s to let go of resistance.” 
• “Surrendering to the process does not mean giving up.” 
• “What surrender means in a spiritual sense is that you stop fighting the process and you start to flow with it.”
• “As you surrender to the process, the beauty of this is you’re letting this process teach you.”
• “The dating process is actually a journey.” 
• “Every date is a stepping stone to love.”
• “You’re not finding the right man, you're becoming the woman that you need to be to attract the man you’ve been dreaming of.” 
• “There’s nothing in our lives that will give us the return on investment that dating will.”
• “We don’t have control over when, where, or how this happens.  All we can do is keep opening our hearts and be ready.”

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• Benjamin came up with the phrase “guardian of the soul’ when co-writing Handbook for the Heart, which Lisa coincidentally read before meeting Benjamin!
• When you are the guardian of someone’s soul, you love them through their whole journey, even if that means you don’t always end up together. You give them nourishment, encouragement, and support.
• Lisa and Benjamin share how they each feel loved and nurtured in a way that their soul calls for.
• A Guardian of Your Soul relationship is expansive, not constricting.
• Are you thinking about how You could be the guardian of someone’s soul? That is where your focus should be, and not just getting one of your own.
• When looking for a coach, find someone who has what you want and is living that life authentically.

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Lisa Shield | YouTube | Facebook | Instagram | Book a Call With Lisa

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Mentioned:

Handbook for the Heart 

Quotes

• “You set the example for what it means to be a man and in every sense of the word.” - Lisa
• “We would not be the people we are today without each other and without the type of relationship that we fostered and nourished.” - Benjamin
• “Everything about who I am is because of how you have loved and nurtured all the best parts of me in this relationship.” - Lisa

“Everything we do is for each other. Everything. This is the most sacred gift we've been given in this lifetime.” - Lisa

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• Tara describes her breakthrough call with Lisa and what made her ultimately commit to the course.
• Tara had never had a serious relationship before and was wondering if she would be alone forever. The pandemic gave her a break to pause and ponder why she was choosing to stay single.
• What did Roy first think of Tara’s profile (written by Benjamin!), and how did it draw him in? 
• Tara and Roy talk about their relationship dynamic and how they communicate with one another. 
• What are some of the old dating patterns Tara worked through while on her journey with Roy?

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Mentioned:

 OkCupid 

Quotes

• “She really is like my best friend and my companion. I'm never too busy because she's my priority.” - Roy
• “Don't keep secrets. Just be honest with each other.” - Tara 
• “People need each other and we're designed to be with people. It's real, and you can find it too.” - Tara 
• “A real man wants a real woman who knows how to make him feel like a man.” - Lisa 
• This is a two-way street. A man needs to get his needs met just as much as we need to get our needs met, they may be different, but you have to know how to give him the things that he really needs.” - Lisa 
• “To me, she's perfect.” - Roy 
• “I'm going to make her happy. She's on my side.” - Roy 
• “It is the best investment I've ever made in my life.” - Tara

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• What are ways our anger pushes men away and turns them cold and distant? 
• What are better ways to show you are disappointed and let down? 
• When a man is scared of getting in trouble or being shamed, he will either do something out of obligation, or he just won’t do it. 
• What causes good men to seek comfort in an external relationship, and what does it have to do with anger? 
• Managing your anger does not mean suppressing it, pushing it away, or denying your feelings. It’s not the anger itself, it’s how we express that anger.
• How do most women use anger as the main emotion?
• Women don’t often even realize how harsh they are being, and how it can come out in the most subtle ways through a call or text. 
• How does biology set men and women up to react differently to anger? 

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Lisa Shield | YouTube | Facebook | Instagram | Book a Call With Lisa

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Mentioned:

John Gottman 

Quotes

• “Guys don't like conflict, especially if it's directed towards them.” - Benjamin
• “Everything starts with a breath, just a breath. And sometimes, it's hard to remember to do that the most basic thing - to take a breath.” - Benjamin
• “Real men really want to make women happy.” - Benjamin 
• “Anger creates separation.”  - Lisa

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• What exactly are bioidentical hormones? 
• Dr. Prudence shares examples of clients who got back their life (and libido!) from getting their hormones checked and taking action. 
• Dr. Prudence sees women whose hormones start changing, as early as their mid-30s.
• What are some symptoms of perimenopause and menopause? 
• Dr. Prudence describes how birth control affects our hormones. 
• Lisa talks about her decision to take bioidentical hormones and how they have helped her out in almost every department. 
• Getting our hormones in balance is the key to embracing our feminine energy. 
• Dr. Prudence walks us through what the typical process looks like when a patient comes to see her.
• Getting your hormones checked and partnering with a hormone specialist is a form of self-care. 

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Mentioned:

The Hall Center 

Radiance Again and Forever 

Estrogen Matters

Quotes

• “Menopause is not just a loss of ovarian hormones, but a loss of all hormones.” - Dr. Prudence 
• “Subtle hormone changes or deficiencies can affect every aspect of our life.” - Dr. Prudence 
• “I’m 60 years old and I look and feel better at 60 than I did at 45 or 50!” - Lisa 
• “It’s not just the mind and the emotions. It’s really the wisdom of the bodies. The sway, the movement, the waves that come from feminine wealth.” - Dr. Prudence

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• Why would Lisa do away with the therapeutic model of dating? 
• What does it mean to take 100% personal responsibility in your relationship? 
• Taking personal responsibility does NOT mean enduring any type of abuse. 
• Lisa and Benjamin talk about the ways they “process” without the long and draining hours of actual processing in their relationship, and how it makes things feel lighter, adding to their level of connection rather than adding blame or shame. 
• What is the first step to taking personal responsibility? 
• Most people’s actions are usually about them, rather than about us. How can we take responsibility for ourselves by having empathy for others? 
• Taking 100% responsibility means just that! Not 80%, 50%, or anything in between.
• Lisa and Benjamin walk us through what it looks like to be nonreactive to what comes our way and instead observe how we feel and diffuse the situation. 
• Sometimes it takes just ONE person to change the entire dynamic of a relationship.
• Even in what seems like an impossible relationship, it may not take much to turn it around once people start to feel heard and seen. 

Continue On Your Journey

Lisa Shield | YouTube | Facebook | Instagram | Book a Call With Lisa

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Mentioned:

don Miguel Ruiz 

The Mastery of Love 

How To Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It 

Quotes

• “If we can see underneath those levels of irritation and bad behavior and see an innocence of what people are really asking for, that helps to keep us in the present moment and really see our partner.” - Benjamin
• “So instead of being the victim, we can be in charge of our thoughts, feelings, actions, words, and our relationship.” - Benjamin 
• “Blaming and complaining aren’t clean forms of communication.” - Benjamin 
• “Even in what seems like an impossible relationship, it may not take much to turn it around.” - Benjamin

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• We want to be optimistic and tell ourselves that we are growth-minded, but if we don’t have the right tools, we will keep needing to learn the same lessons over and over. 
• Putting in work is great, but it has to be the right kind of work that gets the results you are looking for.
• What happens when you’re stuck in a loop, thinking that whatever guy you’re with now, is the best one for you? 
• What is “toxic positivity”? And what are some signs that you are positive in a way that’s actually hindering your chance at finding love? 
• How can you really get to know a great guy that fosters a relationship of vulnerability and trust? 

Continue On Your Journey

Lisa Shield | YouTube | Facebook | Instagram | Book a Call With Lisa

Email the podcast at: [email protected]

Mentioned:

Toxic Positivity 

The Power Of Now 

Don Miguel 

Quotes

• “We don’t make radical changes in our life without taking those parts of our life seriously.” 
• “There is no latest guy or greatest guy that is going to turn out to be the right one without you doing the right work.” 
• “We want to be optimistic and tell ourselves that we are growth-minded and that every relationship is a learning experience, but if you don’t have the right tools, you’re going to keep having the same learning experiences.” 
• “Both my career and my personal life have been leading me to master the art of loving and being loved.”

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• How do we maintain our autonomy in a relationship? 
• What does it look like to lose yourself and your identity in a relationship, and how do hormones and anxiety play a role? 
• Lisa and Benjamin describe a few typical scenarios that occur when the intimate bond starts prematurely. 
• Once we become sexually or chemically bonded, we can start to lose ourselves. 
• In a relationship where you guard each other's souls, you are able to surrender completely. 
• A good coach can help you identify what you have to offer that a man can’t get anywhere else. Working with Lisa and Benjamin, their clients learn to mirror a man’s masculinity back to him, which in turn makes her irresistible. 
• Why are people afraid to ask for the space they need? 

Continue On Your Journey

Lisa Shield | YouTube | Facebook | Instagram | Book a Call With Lisa

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Mentioned:

Carl Rogers

Lynn Andrews 

Attached. 

Quotes: 

• “A man is attracted to a woman because a woman is his teacher.” - Benjamin
• “A woman can offer a man things that a man can’t get from anywhere.” - Benjamin
• “If a woman is in her femininity then a man can be in his masculinity.” - Benjamin 
• “You want to start to allow your reactivity to come up, and then you want to start doing some self-processing work.” - Lisa 
• “Confidence is sexy, and it is super attractive to be in control not of the other person, but of your own reactivity and emotions.” - Lisa

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• What are some of the top excuses women give for not finding the right man? 
• How do you know if YOU are emotionally and spiritually ready to call in The Guardian of YOUR Soul? 
• We get back what we put out. Lisa talks about how to shine your light from the inside out and become a woman that attracts quality men. 
• Why it may be time to throw that long list of things your dream man will have, or at least alter it.
• Lisa talks about her experience where she didn’t feel fully connected to the men she was dating, and will give you the blueprint to how she changed it and became a man magnet.

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Lisa Shield | YouTube | Facebook | Instagram | Book a Call With Lisa

Email the podcast at: [email protected]

Mentioned:

Ted Talk Fashion Model Insecurity 

Quotes

• “We have an idea of what we are striving for, but we are not emotionally or energetically ready to have that relationship.” 
• “What we are putting out is what we are attracting to us.” 
• “I can TRULY be myself.” 
• “You can look at the woman you want to be, and design that.”

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What You’ll Hear In This Episode:

• When we look at most relationships, we don’t see the kind of love that TV and the movies have told us we deserve. 
• How does the fantasy of love leave people disappointed, when in actuality it’s the deep connection and friendship that is really what should be sought after? 
• Working with Lisa and Benjamin can help you get out of the fantasy world and into the right steps that you need to attract the Guardian of Your Soul. 
• Disney movies and romantic comedies show couples declaring their undying love together, but not what love looks like 15 or 20 days, or even years, down the road! 
• Real love offers you a space to be all of yourself. You don’t have to put up walls or pretenses and both of you bring your full selves to the relationship. 

Continue On Your Journey

Lisa Shield | YouTube | Facebook | Instagram | Book a Call With Lisa

Email the podcast at: [email protected]

Mentioned:

Quotes

• “Most of us never really learn how to go on a date and connect with a man consciously.” 
• “If you really want to get love right now in this day and age, it requires something more than just luck or karma.” 
•  “The reality is that you are the common denominator in your love life.” 
• “You don't hear about this in the movies, you don't see this kind of love,   devotion, this kind of openness. In Hollywood and Disney, we have princes with glass slippers and fairy tales, but not this.”

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Email the podcast at: [email protected]