We Need To Talk with Dr. Darcy Sterling

Forgiveness Is A Choice


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Years ago, I was gutted by a falling out with one of my siblings. It quickly became clear that we were on the verge of estrangement, and that impending loss brought me to my knees —I had just recovered from PTSD and was terrified of getting sucked into the black hole of trauma that I’d just come through. 

Frantic for help, I found myself Googling a solution, and up came the term Forgiveness Therapy. 

To be clear: I was not feeling forgiving. But I was feeling desperate. I did not want to revisit the darkness I’d just emerged from. 

A book on forgiveness had recently been published by a professor named Robert Enright. In it he posits that forgiveness isn’t about cutting the other person slack. It’s a life raft for people who feel wronged. Enright’s theory had been peer-reviewed the gold standard in the field of psychology — so, despite my apprehension, I committed to following his program. 


Today, my journey through forgiveness comes full circle in my conversation with the theorist himself, Dr. Robert Enright. 

If you struggle with anger or are someone who holds grudges and you want to explore a solution, please listen to this episode. 

In it, you’ll learn:

  • Why it makes sense if the thought of forgiving someone who wronged you makes you cringe.
  • The consequences of not forgiving.
  • How choosing to forgive puts you in control of your feelings.
  • How Enright’s program helped me to personally bypass a relapse of PTSD.

AND… The beauty of this process is that there’s NO obligation to reconcile with the person who wronged you.

Xxoo Darcy

Akhtar, S., & Barlow, J. (2018). Forgiveness Therapy for the Promotion of Mental Well-Being: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis. Trauma, Violence, & Abuse, 19(1), 107-122. https://doi.org/10.1177/1524838016637079

Freedman, S., & Zarifkar, T. (2016). The psychology of interpersonal forgiveness and guidelines for forgiveness therapy: What therapists need to know to help their clients forgive. Spirituality in Clinical Practice, 3(1), 45–58. https://doi.org/10.1037/scp0000087

Reed, G. L., & Enright, R. D. (2006). The effects of forgiveness therapy on depression, anxiety, and posttraumatic stress for women after spousal emotional abuse. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 74(5), 920–929. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-006X.74.5.920

For More Information on Dr. Robert Enright:

International Forgiveness Institute

Ask Dr. Forgiveness

Forgiveness is a Choice: A Step-by-Step Process for Resolving Anger and Restoring Hope

#ForgivenessHeals #Forgiveness #SelfForgiveness #ForgivenessIsFreedom #ForgivenessTherapy #ForgivenessIsKey #LetItGo #LettingGoOfThePast #LettingGoOfFear #WeNeedToTalkWithDrDarcy #CouplesCounseling #CouplesTherapy #DrDarcySterling #DoctorDarcySterling #DrDarcy #DrRobert Enright

Instagram:@drdarcysterling Facebook:Dr.Darcy SterlingTik Tok:@doctordarcysterling  Twitter:@DrDarcySterling  Threads:@drdarcysterling 

YouTube:@DarcySterling   Watch this episode here on YouTube. 

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We Need To Talk with Dr. Darcy SterlingBy Darcy Sterling

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