Goblet Of Wine: A Drunken British Harry Potter Podcast

WE'VE RELEASED MERCH! That's right, we FINALLY did it, we finally got our arses in gear and created some merch. You can check it out at the link below, you can shop by design and then pick what product you'd like the design to appear on. We hope you like it!

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It's time for an episode we've both eagerly anticipated - Goblet of Fire - THE FILM! We're chatting about the worst film in the entire Harry Potter series, the rampant sexism, Hermione being annoying AF, and the COMPLETE lack of plot. I honestly can't list the things we hate about this film. Just listen.

The fanfiction Hannah was talking about at the end is called Dumbledore's Army and the Year Of Darkness. It's not been deleted off FF.net but I've tracked down this apparently illustrated pdf on goodreads which I can't vough for but from a quick glance looks the same (a content warning - the fic is relatively graphic in terms of violence - https://www.goodreads.com/ebooks/download/10207687-dumbledore-s-army-and-the-year-of-darkness) 

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We finished another book?! Who'd have thunk it!! Not bad for a dumb bitch who can't read and...Hannah. Tune in for this episode where we're chatting chapters 36 & 37 of Goblet of Fire and announcing the results of the house cup. We also chat about Fawkes the Phoenix, the government and capitalism, and beanie babies. So grab a glass and listen along, and most importantly, GET EXCITED FOR SEASON 5!!!

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So we *do* love a ramble but we really may have outdone ourselves this episode, so buckle up for FIFTEEN MINUTES of us talking about *literally* anything other than the chapters we’re supposed to be discussing this episode...but that’s okay because you guys love us for the drunken rambling...right? Right?! Okay whatever. We’re chatting about chapter 35 (that’s right it’s a rare one chapter episode) of goblet of FIRE and whether Voldemort thinks he’s evil, why Sting from the police is a serial killer, and also explaining why neither of us like Lord of the Rings.

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Welcome bacckkkk! In today's episode we're discussing chapters 33 and 34 of Goblet of Fire, aka, VOLDEMORT'S BACK! We're discussing how the fuck Voldemort got his wand, the biggest fuckup yet in the books, and what Bertha went through.  

Rape trigger warning- 23:00-26:50

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Welcome back to EPISODE 50!! How did we do this 50 times?! Why! How did no one stop us? It’s a mystery. Anyway, we’re back and chatting chapters 31 and 32 of goblet of fire. We’re talking daddy and mummy issues, portkey logic, and Voldemort’s dick. We also introduce a new podcast rule!

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WELCOME BACK TO GOBLET OF SWEAT! No, we haven’t changed the name of the podcast, but goblet of sweat is a pretty accurate way to describe the experience of recording a podcast in 36 British heat in a tiny room with closed windows and doors and no AC. In today’s episode we’re drinking a drink based on what we think Bellatrix would drink at the request of our amazing Patreon Samuel. Which turned out to be super damn appropriate as it’s the first chapters with Bellatrix in! We’re chatting Harry actually being logical for once, Dumbledore’s sex memories, and Crouch being trans. Enjoy!

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It’s time for another episode with everyone’s FAVOURITE guest - Neil MacQuarrie! So get ya bingo cards or shot glasses ready for every time we mention Game of Thrones, Doctor Who or Star Wars. We’re chatting chapters 27 and 28 of Goblet of Fire, including discussing the origin of scarlet women, Snape’s virginity, cum socks, and the magical postal system. Enjoy!

Neil's Twitter

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WE'REEE BACK!! AND WE'RE IN THE SAME ROOM! That's right, after almost 5 months we're finally back, 2 meters apart, and recording TOGETHER. To celebrate get ready for THE DRUNKEST EPISODE EVER! Ft us doing shots in a park, drinking out of a cock bottle in a park, and generally getting glared at by half of South London (especially Neil). We're asking important questions such as 'what're the chances of a chicken egg from the supermarket hatching' (ft egg expert Neil), the importance of teaching children to swim (ft swimming expert Hannah), and...Charlie has no special skills. At some point we do also talk about Harry Potter.

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