Welcome to the first ever episode NOT RECORDED TOGETHER :( That's right, me and Hannah are doing some fun lockdown style long distance recordings. This episode may break our record for the episode we talk about Harry Potter the least in. Instead, we're talking about the British educational system, Charlie's teeth, Hannah looking after snails, and we read our BIRTH CHARTS! Because astrology is definitely...real. ENJOY!

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It's us again! We're back with an episode that was pre-recorded before the entire country went into lockdown...yay. We're chatting about chapters 11-12 of Goblet of Fire, about how Charlie lives in a hole, ranting about British Geography and travel logistics (YOU CAN'T GET A TAXI FROM DEVON TO KINGS CROSS!!!), Draco's obsession with Harry, and the death troll. This episode also features a beautiful rendition of the sorting hat song by Hannah.

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Sorry if you’re listening to this for a distraction from Corona Virus because we mention it within the FIRST FIVE SECONDS. Aside from our blissful naivety about COVID-19, we’re talking about Ron’s big...feet, JK Rowling’s questionable metaphors, how all Veela are lesbians, and most importantly - David Tennant’s tongue. We also have Tiktok now if you want to see us embarrass ourselves on there.   

Trigger warnings: 

18.30 - TW sexual harrasment/assault start 

20.30 - end 

21.55 - TW start again 

22.36 - TW rape 

24.35 - end

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Hello and welcome back to your favourite way to make coronavirus self isolation EVEN WORSE! Today we’re drinking Irish coffees (because quidditch, duh) and chatting about one of our favourite chapters - THE QUIDDITCH WORLD CUP. We’re also rambling about Hannah’s mum splitting a fox, transphobia in the books, #justiceforalibashir, Krum’s pull out game, and doing lots of maths...

Muggle Pants Video

Ludo Bagman

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Welcome back to THE GAYEST CHAPTERS EVER! That’s right, today we’re reading chapters 5-6 of goblet of fire and discussing our latest Patreon goals, how the twins life is basically high school musical, how wizards need to stop going to Albania. We’re also answering a Patreon question about our favourite places in London!

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We’re backkkk. This episode is dedicated to Hannah’s departed grandad Adrian…who has a shit taste in alcohol. We’re reading chapters 3 & 4 of Goblet of Fire and talking a LOT about fat phobia, bats, shrews, and the Weasley twins absolutely shite sense of humour.

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It’s time for a very special FESTIVE bonus episode! We’re getting into the Christmas spirit with a Christmas themed fan fiction writing challenge! We asked our Patreon’s to send us prompts for: character, location, object, and spell. We picked these at random and the only rule was we had 10 minutes to write a fan fiction mentioning all of the prompts, AND Christmas. Trash ensued. Enjoy and don’t forget to head to our Twitter/IG stories to vote on your favourite fan fic!

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