Going Terribly

Alice is back! And Doug is here! Going Terribly is back on track with its usual two hosts, perhaps out of fear the guest hosts over the past few weeks might be gunning for their jobs. Where would that hit them on a 1-10 pain scale? Who's to say? But they'll cover said scale, along with possible kitten names, and more in this comeback episode. Big time suburbanite stuff inside. And before it's all over, someone might just pee a little.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Famous blues magician Muddy Johnson

- Where/how would your intestine hang out, and why would anyone ask that?

- The deliciousness of a Cyclone Supreme pizza

- The most painful idea for a tattoo ever?

- Disney vs. Joel Osteen: To whom would you listen regarding your pet's death?

Well, it's Alice's turn to go on vacation. Er, be out sick. So William/Will/A Random Fellow is filling in to try to make sure Doug doesn't screw everything up while she's gone. Doug has a game prepared, but Will is ready and has brought along his own. Who takes control of the show? It's the ultimate battle of wills. Well, battle of Will and Doug, rather.

Other discussion topics may include:

- A special visit from one of the creators of possibly the worst PSP game ever made (no, really!)

- Some possible names for the new Terrible Kittens

- A healthy post-Thanksgiving serving of bullcrap pie

- Why Celebrity Price is Right would be really stupid and really fantastic

- Stormy Pinkness

It's two days before Thanksgiving, and Alice and Doug have a lot to be thankful for.

And yet, somehow all they could really think of was Ryan Reynolds.

But there is a big surprise later in the episode (well, technically two!) that will be more than enough reason to stick around.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Did you know America's Funniest Home Videos is still on the air?

- How humane society trips are like sex

- Making cakes out of hamburgers. Or vice versa.

- Is a toaster a good gift to get for the celebrity who has it all?

- What in the world is a Rizzler?

Doug is back! And he brought most of his voice with him!

But, most importantly, Alice just had her first mammogram. And, number two* in importance, today is World Toilet Day. So enjoy plenty of scatological goodness.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Can you overdose on Theraflu?

- Better band name: The Horizontal Shelf or A Ketchup Bidet?

- A heckuva Donald Duck pooping impression

- Plungers hanging from the ceiling

- An entire lasagna

*heh

Doug has fallen ill, but Going Terribly wasn't about to miss a week. So, for the first time ever, there's a guest host! Naem Madi is on board to help out while offering his own twist of fun with the musical "Naem That Tune." Meanwhile, Alice offers insights on Hollywood celebrity family feuds (not of the Steve Harvey variety) and Hemingway/Bible/colon connections.

But Doug does offer a couple of notes from the grave. Er, sidelines. So you won't be completely free of him.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Who is Bella Thorne to you?

- The downside to snakeskin soap

- Have you forgotten about Dre?

- Would you rather win one fewer Oscar than your sister or just go ahead and die?

- Ryan Gosling wasn't available

This Sunday is Alice's birthday! With Alice hitting the big 4-0, Doug digs up a bunch of stuff from Alice's birth year that might make her and Steve Guttenberg feel a little old. Like Who's the Boss and Depends. Doug presents a couple of games and even tries his hand at Alice's most popular segment.

Other discussion topics may include:

- The disappointment that spinal taps aren't as serious or dangerous as they sound

- Purse Suer vs. Purse Sewer - which is the worse pun?

- The 1984 hit Seinfeld movie

- It Takes Two: Electric Boogaloo

- Lots and lots of quantum stuff. Or not. Better grab a pocket calculator just in case.

Happy Halloween!

Alice and Doug invite Kevin Roach to the show for his annual Halloween episode. This year they debate which horror movie villains they'd bed (spoiler: The Predator has some sexy abs) and recite a brand new scary story. They also discuss the merits of a travel bidet (or two!) and wonder if Pat Morita could have convincingly played a small town sheriff.

Other discussion topics may include:

- The dark side of Dr. Seuss

- Auntie Lee's Meat Pies

- When on a vibrating boat, are you more likely to poop yourself, orgasm, or gently fall asleep?

- That time Hitler unwittingly left some DNA in a sausage mixer

- Honestly, more routine cannibalism talk than should be comfortable

This week Alice leaves her scheduled colonoscopy up to a Facebook vote while Doug scours app stores for strange Fitbit alternatives. This is adulting in 2024.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Why isn't there a play or musical based on the 1987 cinematic classic Mannequin?

- Maybe a little too much Enrique

- Are you wealthy enough to afford cameras in your medication?

- All the things about Ernest Hemingway that rose...and didn't.

- It's Mrs. Shen's birthday!!!

Alice has a colonoscopy coming up. Somehow this isn't the first topic she and Doug discuss. But once they get on her butt, boy, does it prove difficult to get off.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Completely unrelated Tummy Trouble

- Turkey Testicle Festical

- Would you trust a biology teacher/realtor to perform routine surgeries in your home?

- Attempting to hold friends hostage using really comfortable furniture

- Steroids might get a bad rep, but goodness, do they make your face skin lovely.

Could you imagine if today were Julia Roberts's birthday?! It's not, but could you just IMAGINE?!?!

Elsewhere in this week's episode, Doug and Alice just got back from St. Louis (and TO the future!), and now they're ready to find some fowl balls or other unusual body parts to devour at the West Side Nut (heh) Club Fall Festival.

Other discussion topics may include:

- Keep ketchup off your hot dogs

- What do you do once you've tried every flavor of every brand of sparkling water? Is it just over now?

- Near universal praise for Costco...except for a troubling recent move in their chicken packaging

- Jame Doody Dench

- Revisiting the time certain adult toys may have been lost in a matter of national security