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Having It A.L.L.
Having It A.L.L. episodes
- Relationship Misconceptions That Are Making You Unhappy with Sarah Bivens
Are your relationship beliefs actually creating the connection you want—or quietly sabotaging it?
In this honest conversation, Sarah and I unpack the subtle, sneaky beliefs that shape how we show up in love—and often lead to frustration, resentment, and emotional burnout. These are the misconceptions we bought into for years, that quietly crept into our marriage, and that we had to challenge in order to grow individually and as a couple.
From the myth that your partner should “complete you,” to the belief that love means putting yourself last, we get into the raw truths behind what actually works in a healthy, passionate, and sustainable relationship.
Whether you’re single, married, dating, or somewhere in between, this episode will help you check the beliefs you're bringing into your relationships—and give you permission to create something far more real, powerful, and aligned.
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
1 hr 7 min - The Top 5 Regrets of the Dying (And How to Make Sure They’re Not Yours)
What will you regret when your time is up?
In this confronting and thought-provoking episode, I explore the five most common regrets people share as they approach the end of their lives—insights captured by palliative care nurse Bronnie Ware after years of supporting individuals in their final days.
These reflections aren’t hypothetical or abstract. They are raw truths gathered from real people who were able to reflect on their lives with total clarity. And what they revealed is both sobering and inspiring: most of us are not living in alignment with what truly matters.
If you've ever felt like you're drifting through life, holding back from expressing your authentic self, or putting off joy and connection for “someday,” this conversation offers a powerful opportunity to reflect and recalibrate. It’s a reminder that we each have a choice—every single day—to live fully, love boldly, and honor the deepest parts of ourselves.
Let this be the moment that wakes you up to what’s possible, before it's too late.
Links from the episode:
- Bronnie's original blog article "Regrets of the Dying" - https://bronnieware.com/blog/regrets-of-the-dying/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
49 min - Codependency and Unhealthy Attachments In Relationships
How healthy would you say your attachment is with your partner?
In today's episode I share an email from a listener who opens up on her relationship attachment. I appreciate her vulnerability and courage in this one because it gives us all a chance to heal and grow.
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
45 min - Feeling Stressed or Anxious? This One Question Can Instantly Stop Your Stress and Overwhelm
How stressed out do you feel right now? Have you dealt with stress earlier today or this week?
We all experience stress, it's part of life. But not everybody relates to stress in the same way. You have your own go-to methods for dealing with your stress, and some are more effective than others.
Years ago it became a personal mission of mine to get on top of my stress and anxiety, and learn how to deal with it in more healthy ways. Drinking, smoking and pornography were not leading me down the path I wanted, and so I sought out other means of relating to the circumstances in my life.
In today's episode I'm sharing with you a massive breakthrough I had that led to me looking at stress in a whole new way. The "7 minutes" breakthrough as I like to call it, has helped me get back into my center when life's stressors have knocked me out of alignment. I'm sharing this with you today with the goal of inspiring you to take a harder look at your triggers and the things that stress you out in life, and to seek out true healing so you can experience the joy you truly desire.
Resources from this episode:
- Compassionate Inquiry: Diffuse Your Emotional Triggers with Dr. Gabor Mate
- Chronic Stress Puts Your Health At Risk
- Sympathetic vs. Parasympathetic State: How Stress Affects Your Health
Other Having It A.L.L. episodes about stress with action items and takeaways:
- How To Coach Yourself Through The Chronic Stresses Of Everyday Life
- A Powerful Method For Changing Your Relationship Towards Stress - How To Learn To Love Stress Through Exercise
- The STOP Method For De-Stressing and Reclaiming Balance In 30 Seconds
- Learn How To Master Your Stress (Instead Of Running From It) So That You Can Be Calm In The Face Of Fire
- A 15 Minute Meditation For Easing Stress, Fear and Anxiety (from Katie Krimitsos of the Women's Meditation Network Podcast)
- The Balance Experts Have Spoken! 10 Expert Tips On Living A Life Of Balance (Plus 15 More You're Really Going To Want To Use In Your Life)
- 3 Underlying Reasons Why You Don't Have Balance (And What To Do About Them)
DO YOU DESIRE MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE IN YOUR LIFE?
The "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint" is a self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
48 min - Healing My Wounded Inner Child
What does it mean to heal your inner child?
The process of growing up into adulthood is filled with many impactful events, some empowering and others not. As children, we are experience life with little to no filter, leaving us open to experience hurts, fears, angers and traumas with an extreme level of intensity and realness. Those "wounds", when not addressed properly, carry into our adulthood and have a profound influence over our lives.
In today's episode I'm sharing with you a recent experience where I had the opportunity to look at, talk with and heal my wounded inner child.
DO YOU DESIRE MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE IN YOUR LIFE?
The "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint" is a self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
46 min - Avoiding Burnout, Business Planning and Content Creation: Answering Your Life Questions Part 3
Ever feel like the more you achieve, the emptier you feel?
You’re hitting goals, growing your business, and pushing hard—but the burnout is real. In this raw and real episode, I answer your powerful questions about how to avoid burnout, build a meaningful business, and create content that actually aligns with your energy and purpose.We unpack:
The hidden costs of Type A success
How to balance performance and capacity (without sacrificing your health)
Why your business plan might be missing the one thing that matters
How to launch a vlog, podcast, or blog without spinning out
This is part of a series where I dive into YOUR questions, and this one’s all about life, creation, and conscious business. Let’s get into it.
READY TO STOP RUNNING ON EMPTY?
Grab the free "Burnout Breakthrough Audit" and get crystal clear on what’s draining you, where you're out of alignment, and what to do about it, in less time than it takes to listen to this episode!
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
55 min - Fasting Isn’t About Food...It’s About Emotional Mastery
What if the reason you keep breaking your commitments isn’t about willpower, but emotions?
This episode dives into how emotions like stress, frustration, and apathy quietly hijack your habits, your follow-through, and your sense of integrity. I’m sharing how a simple weekly fasting practice helped me see where I was letting feelings lead, and how often that meant letting myself down.
This isn’t about food. It’s about practicing emotional discipline. It’s about learning to show up even when you don’t feel like it.
You’ll walk away with personal insights, real-life examples, and a clear challenge: make one small commitment AND KEEP IT, no matter what your emotions say.
If you’re tired of breaking promises to yourself, let’s change that.
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
16 min - The 6 Steps I Use to Get Unstuck When I Feel Lost, Unclear or Unmotivated
Ever feel like your life should feel amazing, but inside... you’re just stuck?
You’ve got the job, the family, the “success”—but confidence is shaky, motivation is MIA, and the truth is you’re scared you’re wasting your potential.
In this episode, I respond to a listener email from “Jim,” a man with a beautiful life on the outside and a gnawing feeling of being lost on the inside. If you’ve ever said: “I don’t know where to start,” or “I feel like I’m this close to something real but can’t seem to move”—this one is for you.
I walk you through the six principles I’ve personally used (and coached others through) to reconnect with clarity, rebuild trust with yourself, and actually start living the life you know you’re meant for.
No fluff. No hacks. Just truth, ownership, and a roadmap back to your power.
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEWLearn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
40 min - Who’s Watching You Quit On Yourself (And Learning From Your Example)?
Who are you unconsciously giving permission to quit on themselves?
In this episode, I share a powerful story from a recent Play Camp where one small decision to avoid discomfort triggered a ripple effect of playing small. We unpack what it means to be a watcher—and how your fear (or your courage) directly impacts the greatness of others.
I also reflect on a personal moment where I bailed on a commitment—and how that moment shaped my relationship with leadership, alignment, and integrity.
If you've ever wondered why you shrink when you say you want to expand—or if you sense that people around you are following your lead even when you’re not proud of the example—you need to hear this one.
Because someone is always watching.
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
34 min - How to Turn Stress Into Power (Using Nothing But Your Workout)
What if your next workout could help you stay calm in a fight, show up powerfully at work, or stop spiraling when life hits hard?
In this episode, I break down how to use exercise as a training ground for transforming your relationship with stress. I’m not talking about just getting abs or hitting a new PR, I’m talking about emotional mastery, breath control, and learning to flow when everything in you wants to force.
If stress runs your life… this is your call to flip the script. You’ll learn how to tap into your breath, shift your energy, and create new patterns that ripple into every area of your life.
Your body doesn’t lie. And it’s telling you it’s time to train differently.
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
The Having It A.L.L. Blueprint gives you the exact tools I use with clients to create real, lasting change—in a simple, flexible format that fits your life. No fluff. No long video modules. Just powerful shifts you can apply right now, on your time. Click below to learn more and purchase.
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
19 min
About Having It A.L.L.
From the publisher's feed
Welcome to Having It A.L.L., the podcast that flips the script on what it means to “have it all” in life. I’m Matthew Bivens, your host and friend, and I’m inviting you to join me in conversations…
designed to help you radically shift your confidence, self worth, and clarity. In order to create new results in your life - whether that’s in your relationships, your health, your money, your family or your life’s purpose - you must make new decisions and build new habits. This podcast will not only deliver the lessons and action items that will help you move the needle in your life, but also share the vulnerable and honest truth about the challenges of working to improve and ultimately master yourself. Each breakdown can lead to breakthrough, and we cover it all on this podcast. Personal development is not an easy road, but you can create meaningful change that lasts. Let’s do it together one choice at a time. Tune in each week and see that it’s not only possible to have it all, but that you were meant to all along!