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Having It A.L.L.
Having It A.L.L. episodes
- The "Be-Do-Have" Paradigm And The Simple Mindset Shift That Will Realign Your Life
Ever feel like you're doing all the right things but still not getting what you want?
That’s where the Be-Do-Have paradigm comes in. Most people have it backwards. They think once they have the success, time, love, or clarity—they’ll do the right things and finally be who they want to be.But that’s not how it works.
If you want lasting results, alignment, and peace that doesn’t crack under pressure—you’ve got to flip the script.In this episode, I break down the Be-Do-Have framework through a powerful lens—drawing from the book Beyond Body Beyond Mind by Dr. Sukhi Muker.
I walk you through how to live it out, how to spot where you're off, and how to train the habit of BEing in real-time—especially when life feels chaotic.This isn't theory. It’s the difference between temporary change and transformation that sticks.
Let’s get into it.STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
23 min - Stop Drifting—The 5 W’s That Realign Your Life
Are you really living... or just reacting?
In this episode, I’m handing you a tool for deep, no-BS introspection: the 5 W’s of Radical Self Awareness.
This isn’t some surface-level journaling prompt. This is a mirror. A spotlight. A call-out and a call-forward—all in one.
You'll explore:
Who is influencing your thoughts, energy, and identity
What you’re truly committed to (and what you say you're committed to)
When you tend to abandon yourself
Where your environments are either draining or fueling you
Why you haven’t leapt yet—even though you know it’s time
This episode was sparked by an email from a listener, Benjamin Foley. We connected over our shared approach to fear—leaning into it. Not running from it. Benjamin’s article, “Advice On Anxiety No One Tells You”, lit a fire under me, and now I’m passing that torch to you.
You don’t need another checklist. You need a pattern interrupt.
You need to sit with these questions like your life depends on it—because in a way, it does.
Radical self awareness is the first step to radical self leadership. And the only person who can give you that… is you.
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
28 min - The Truth About Balance: Why You’re Out of Alignment (And Don’t Know It)
What if the reason life feels so off... is because your wheels are out of balance?
In this episode, I introduce you to a powerful framework called The Body Vehicle—a tool I learned through the YourDay Balance Game that completely shifted how I understand (and live) life balance.
Here’s the idea:
If your life is a car, you’ve got five essential wheels—Spiritual, Mental, Emotional, Social, and Physical.
When those wheels are under-inflated, over-inflated, or straight up missing... your ride through life gets bumpy.Uneven.
Chaotic.
This isn't just metaphor—it’s feedback.
And in this episode, I break it all down:
What each of the 5 wheels represents
How to tell when you're out of alignment
Simple ways to get back in balance without adding more to your plate
If you’ve been grinding through life, wondering why it feels so damn hard despite doing “all the right things,” this episode is your mirror.
Time to check your tires.
Let’s smooth out the ride—together.
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
16 min - 8 Habits That Make You Unshakable In Life, Love and Leadership
Are you showing up like the person you say you want to be?
Or are you still stuck in habits that keep you in survival mode—burnt out, resentful, and playing small?In this episode, I’m joined by my powerhouse wife Sarah—Balance Lifestyle Coach, Personal Trainer, and walking embodiment of what I call a Humble Badass. Together, we break down the 8 habits she uses (and teaches) to help high-performing women reclaim their power without losing their softness.
This isn’t about hustle.
It’s about alignment.It’s about embodiment.It’s about walking your talk—in the gym, in your marriage, with your kids, and in your own mirror.We unpack her Unleash Your Humble Badass framework—a no-fluff process for cultivating self-trust, energetic presence, and a grounded confidence that doesn’t need to prove itself.
These tools aren’t magic.
They’re principles in motion.You can use them—or not.But if you’ve been craving a more honest, empowered, and sustainable way to show up in your life... this episode is your invitation.Let’s go.
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
42 min - "You Have To Move Your Feet": A Story About Seeing The Beauty In All Of Life's Circumstances with Robert Monroe
Today’s guest is a father to three daughters, a husband to a beautiful wife, friend to myself and so many others, and an economist by profession.
His name is Robert Monroe, and if you met him in person, the first thing you’d probably notice is his smile.
He’s got one of those ear to ear smiles that tends to come with a hearty laugh and come from a place of joy.
But behind the smile is a man who has been some incredibly trying times in his life. At a young age Robert was orphaned and learned some brutal lessons about life. But his smile never faded.
I’m incredibly honored to bring you this conversation with Robert, where we talk about life, family, parenthood, and much more.
What you’ll learn in this episode:
- A powerful metaphor for viewing your life as a masterpiece
- How to create momentum and velocity in your life
- An inspiring definition of "family"
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
1 hr 17 min - The Personal Development Trap: Why Chasing Growth Might Be Holding You Back
When’s the last time you stopped to actually see your growth?
Not the goal you're chasing. Not the next version of you that you think you should be. I'm talking about a real, honest pause—to look back and say, “Wow, I’ve come a long way.”In this episode, I unpack a few powerful moments where I caught myself in the act of growth—one with my wife, one with myself—and what it taught me about self-mastery, presence, and how easily we overlook our own evolution.
If you're someone who's been "doing the work," you probably have a high bar. But here's the truth: constantly chasing better without stopping to acknowledge the wins is a fast-track to burnout and self-judgment.
In this episode I talk about:
Why high achievers struggle to recognize their own healing
The cost of skipping acknowledgment
What real growth looks like in relationships and in the mirror
How to build in reflection without losing momentum
This isn’t about staying stuck in the past. It’s about using your progress as proof—you’re not who you used to be. And that matters.
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
24 min - The Quiet Habit That’s Killing Your Self Confidence And Self Trust
What if the real reason you’re stuck isn’t a lack of time or willpower—but a lack of trust in yourself?
Every broken promise to yourself chips away at your confidence—and you don’t even realize it’s happening. From missed workouts to late-night scrolling instead of journaling, it’s not about discipline—it’s about self-trust.
In this episode, I break down why the seemingly small commitments you flake on matter more than you think. Because if you can’t count on YOU…who can?
We talk about:
- How broken promises create quiet chaos in your life
- Why you’re stuck in the same patterns (even though you “know better”)
- The ripple effect of self-integrity—and how to raise your personal standard
Plus, I share five battle-tested ways to follow through, even when life throws you curveballs. If you want to lead your life with intention and actually feel good doing it, this one's for you.
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
22 min - The 3 Mindsets That Have Transformed My Confidence, Relationships and Wealth
In today's episode I'm sharing with you three mindsets that have been the biggest catalysts for my personal transformation over the past 4 years. From my self confidence, to the quality of my relationships, to my ability to attract money and create wealth, these 3 things have been the spark for them all.
This episode was inspired by a question I was asked last week, "What would you attribute to the huge transformation you've made in your life over the past 4 years?".
Here's where I was:
- I didn't trust myself. I had low confidence that I could do and achieve what I wanted to in life (financially, career wise, goal wise, in relationships, etc.)
- I wore a mask of physical confidence -- friends saw me as a person who was confident in my body, but internally I judged, and compared and told myself that I was never big, strong, "black" enough.
- I had complete financial immaturity. I was totally scarce minded. Afraid to look at my bank account. Anxious during financial conversation. I was swimming in student loan and credit card debt, and had no plan to get out because I was so scared of my personal finances.
- I had a lukewarm intimate relationship with my wife (dating at the time). We both came into the relationship with fears, judgements, negative self talk, and that created a lukewarm bedroom.
Where I am 4 years later:
- Insane confidence in myself, that's grounded with humility. I have come to understand things about myself, how I operate, what I'm capable of, that I never knew before. realized I'm stronger, smarter, more resourceful, kind, compassionate, passionate, sexy, courageous than I ever knew possible. Also realized that I don't know it all, that my growth is contingent upon my ability to seek and receive feedback powerfully. That's where my humility comes from.
- I have a strong, passionate, loving, trusting relationship with my wife. connected, not attached. Amazing sex and intimacy. We feel confident to explore the parameters of our relationship and what loving one another unconditionally means. For us that looks like non-monogamy. We're married and love each other completely, and we support one another in creating powerful, intimate relationships with other people (physically, spiritually, emotionally....all of that)
- Iv'e opened myself up to receive abundance and generate more money today than I ever have, with much less effort. I have confidence in my ability to achieve the goals I set out. I'm able to take risks and do things that no one else around me is doing (quit my job to pursue a passion, right before having a baby, start a podcast, leverage my gifts and talents, build an online empire).
Listen to the episode to hear the 3 mindsets that have led to all of these personal transformations.
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
22 min - You’re In The Fire—Here's How You Don’t Lose Your Center
What do you lean on when life blindsides you, again and again—and you’re too tired to pretend you’ve got it all together?
When life throws you into the fire—when the hits keep coming and you’re running on fumes—it’s easy to spiral, snap, or shut down.
In this episode, I’m handing you two powerful beliefs to anchor you when everything feels like too much.
They were given to me in the middle of a tough moment.
My basement flooded. No hot water. A wave of inconvenience that could’ve easily wrecked my peace. But instead of collapsing into stress, I chose something different. And the results? Miraculous.
Here’s the truth:
🔥 You are never given more than you can handle.
🔥 You always have the power to choose how you respond.
These aren’t just affirmations—they’re tools to help you stay centered, clear, and powerful, no matter the size of the storm. Think of beliefs like t-shirts: try them on, see how they fit. Keep what empowers you. Toss what doesn’t.
If you’re feeling stretched, tested, or straight-up burned out—this one’s for you.
Let’s talk about how to stay in your power when life turns up the heat.
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
21 min - The Consequences Of Brutal Honesty
There can be a tremendous amount of fear and anxiety associated with honesty, despite the freeing impact that complete honesty can have on ourselves and in our relationships.
This episode was inspired by an article I read titled "The Pros And Cons Of Brutal Honesty".
The following quote from the article sets up this episode perfectly:
"People that stop growing are individuals who decide they can no longer handle brutal honesty."
I believe part of what it means to love someone unconditionally - yourself included - is being honest with them. Honest with how they are showing up, your feelings towards them, how you experience them, what you'd like to experience with them, what you see for them, the impact they have on your life.
This show is about rewriting beliefs, moving through fears, discovering your truth, and viewing life through a lens of abundance and love -- and getting there, for most of us, takes growth.
What you'll hear in this episode:
- The common consequences, both welcomed and not, of being brutally honest
- My experience with being deceptive and opaque in relationships
- A great free tool to help you practice honesty with yourself
STRUGGLING WITH CONSISTENCY?
Download the free "trust account" app from the YourDay Balance Game, and start building trust with YOURSELF today!
Android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.balancegame.ydbg
iPhone: https://apps.apple.com/us/app/ydbg-watch-play-discover/id1489276659
FEELING THE IMPACT OF CODEPENDENCY?
Watch the free #1 obstacle video and learn what derails all successful people and keeps them from moving from codependent to independent
https://theydbg.com/obstacle-video/
WANT TO FEEL MORE CLARITY, CONFIDENCE AND PURPOSE?
Get the "Having It A.L.L. Blueprint", my self-paced online program for designing and living your greatest life!
https://hia.ck.page/products/blueprint
CHECK OUT SOME OFFERS FROM OUR AWESOME PARTNERS
Needed: https://bit.ly/3IKmWzL - use code HIA20 to get 20% off your order or HIA100 for $100 off a Complete Plan
LEAVE THE PODCAST A REVIEW ON APPLE PODCASTS
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/having-it-all-conversations-about-living-an-abundant/id1093257684
CHECK OUT THE ENTIRE HAVING IT A.L.L. PODCAST CATALOG
https://www.matthewbivens.com/
GET IN TOUCH WITH MATTHEW
24 min
About Having It A.L.L.
From the publisher's feed
Welcome to Having It A.L.L., the podcast that flips the script on what it means to “have it all” in life. I’m Matthew Bivens, your host and friend, and I’m inviting you to join me in conversations…
designed to help you radically shift your confidence, self worth, and clarity. In order to create new results in your life - whether that’s in your relationships, your health, your money, your family or your life’s purpose - you must make new decisions and build new habits. This podcast will not only deliver the lessons and action items that will help you move the needle in your life, but also share the vulnerable and honest truth about the challenges of working to improve and ultimately master yourself. Each breakdown can lead to breakthrough, and we cover it all on this podcast. Personal development is not an easy road, but you can create meaningful change that lasts. Let’s do it together one choice at a time. Tune in each week and see that it’s not only possible to have it all, but that you were meant to all along!