Heaving Bosoms

Hey HBs! It's Post-Apocalyptic Times!! We're recapping CLAIMED by Elle Kennedy, and wow is outlaw country sex and kink positive! We've got a heroine with a BIG secret, a hero with a vendetta, and a passel of boys we can't get enough of!

Bonus Content: Michael's angry bird artistic debut, that potent post-apocalyptic pussy, sexy hit point increases, the confusing commerce of outlaw country, flower favors, outlaw jail, and so much more!

Lady Loves:

Sabrina: see your friends as much as possible! Especially if they live far away.

Mel: I've been noodling on some wisdom from a fictional yoga class written by Sarina Bowen. The idea "never give up and always surrender." Work hard and follow your dreams, but allow for things to evolve along the way!

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Hey HBs! Mel and Sabrina are here to recap RAVISHED by Amanda Quick! It's a historical with a fossil-obsessed heroine, a VERY misunderstood hero, a dangerous ring of robbers, and a cavernous ruination!!

Bonus Content: Mel got her 5 yards of dirt delivered, Sabrina wants to be BFFs with this heroine, the gals go on a crustacean tangent, Mel does a big word association on everyone because it's tired in here, Lady Whipplethorpe, Lord Applebottom Doorman, and so much more!

Lady Loves:

Joint lady love: HB David sending a much-sought 1st print of a Lisa Kleypas book to HB Emily after a Patreon watch party! HBs are the BEST.

Sabrina: StoryGraph has actual graphs now! Pie and bar ones!

Mel: Get yourself whatever your 5 yards of dirt is! Is it nuts? Maybe. But is it for you? DEFINITELY.

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Hey HBs! HAPPY ST. VINCENT WEEK! Tomorrow, April 2nd, is officially the 3rd (or maybe 4th?) annual St. Vincent Day! Where we celebrate Sebastian St. Vincent, the misunderstood bad boy who's really just broken and wants to ensconce your feet in warmth and feed you and plan funerals so you don't have to and become the sexist casino business man and take bullets for you. CASUAL STUFF.

Last year, we got recommendations for books that have St. Vincent vibes and boy did HB Taylor deliver! She's back with us to recap THE LUCKIEST LADY IN LONDON by Sherry Thomas. We have the horniest heroine on a mission, an asshole in disguise as the Ideal Gentleman, mistress-turned-marital machinations, and so much more!

Bonus Content: so much math horniness, floriography, chalkboard fantasies, tentacle fingers, telescope metaphors, and more!

Lady Loves:

Sabrina: if you can, hire a person to do the thing you hate! Sabrina just got a guy who will mow her lawn and now she can use that time cross-stitching or reading or knitting AND reading or just taking a load off.

Taylor: Weleda body lotion. It smells like plants and she swears by it.

Mel: laugh directly in the face of misogynists. If a guy looks you dead in your beautiful face and says he doesn't "need your permission to call your husband" give into your involuntary response and cackle right in his face!

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Hey HBs! We haven't recapped an alien romance in a while... dare we say TOO LONG! We're here today with TAKEN TO VORAXIA by Elizabeth Stevens! As of the release of this episode, Mel has read through book 6 without any plans to stop. This series is sooo good!

TW: discussions of sexual assault, slavery, and forced abortions.

Bonus Content: Mel can't tear herself away from the Ruthless Bosses series by Theodora Taylor, how much we love the there-aren't-enough-babies trope, xora pockets (insert rooster emoji here), and ships turning into armadas!!!

Don't worry, Mel told Sabrina all about the rest of the books in the Ruthless Bosses series by Theodora Taylor and that will be out on Patreon and Apple subscription on Tuesday, 4/2!!

Lady Loves

Mel: Pizza dough made from scratch, and then cinnamon rolls made with any leftover dough!

Sabrina: Author Emma Hamm is a recent discovery with a DEEP backlist and oh Sabrina might need saving pretty soon!

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Hey y'all! We're here with part 2 of IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMEWHERE by Roan Parrish! We left you in the middle of their first (and only?) fight, which we acknowledge was a mean thing to do. But! There's an HEA!

CW: for discussions of parental death and attempted suicide.

Bonus Content: Mel did some hyperfocus "cleaning" because there was no one around to stop her, Sabrina wants Ginger's book (it exists! Huzzah!), Mel "pegged [Sabrina] so hard," and Sabrina is a sister goddess.

Lady Loves:

Mel: Mary Seacole! She was a badass nurse and Black woman who was a contemporary of the better-known Florence Nightingale.

Sabrina: HB Washcloths! She's needed something to do with her hands while podcasting, so now she's doing small knitting projects.

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Hey HBs! We're here with IN THE MIDDLE OF SOMEWHERE by Roan Parrish! This is part 1 because we loved this book soooooo much. This MM romance features a tattooed professor with anxiety and a super burly, cabin-building, care-taking dreamboat.

Bonus Content: Mel's bringing big grown-up-lady-sleepover energy, Sabrina is now tailoring reading lists to Mel's big mouth, both gals are horned up for love, and we meet Sabrina's anxiety gremlin!

Lady Loves:

Mel: The soundtrack of the musical SIX! Especially the song All You Wanna Do sung by Didi Romero (Katherine Howard) and Get Down sung by Olivia Donaldson (Anne of Cleves). I'm told you can get both with a youtube music subscription.

Sabrina: Figure out a way to do what you HAVE to do while also doing the things you WANT to do! Sabrina has started reading with audiobooks so she can color at the same time (it's way more complicated than that, but whatevs).

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Hey HBs! We're back with ANY DUCHESS WILL DO by Tessa Dare! We restart our tale right after the library finger-b*ng, and these two are convinced that they only have until the end of the week. Will he gut his BFF for this woman??

Content warning: discussions of infant death and mentions of miscarriage.

Bonus Content: Mel just dropped her family off at the airport, Mel and Sabrina "haven't even been railed yet" (or ever?), Sabrina found the ultimate tax-deductible ass, and we love every blue-blooded vein in someone's body pounding in desire for us!

Lady Loves:

Sabrina: get you some watercolor markers if that's what will help you create the art of your dreams!

Mel: is it 1am? Sure. But do you need some brownies? Probs. Make them!!!

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Hey HBs! We're here to recap ANY DUCHESS WILL DO by Tessa Dare! It's an Englandtimes book featuring a sad, broken Duke, his desperate mother, and the serving girl who will change them all forever.

Bonus Content: Mel's got a mesakkah dick on her phone screen now, Sabrina learned about screenshots a long time ago, Sabrina has special feelings about stickers, and so much more!

Lady Loves:

Sabrina: Wear the silly costume! Be a shrimp! Do it!!

Mel: Call an audible! The sportsball kind, that is. If something changes, go with the flow and make it a two-parter!

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Hey HBs! It's time to cross the finish line of THE GIRL WITH THE STARS IN HER EYES by Xio Axelrod. Toni is starting to mesh with and carve out her role in the band, Seb is remining himself of his no-fraternization clause constantly, and Kandy is ready to make some waves! Y'all, this childhood best-friends to lovers set in the soundscape of an all-girl rock band, frankly, rocked our world.

Bonus Content: Sabrina has been ORGANIZING HER LIFE and will not be accepting questions, we're so glad we're not famous, what are x's and o's, the gals aren't DP Sherlock Holmses, WE WANT A SAPPHIC SECOND CHANCE ROMANCE IN THIS SERIES, and so much more!

Lady Loves:

Sabrina: Make the effort for long-distance pals! Sabrina's friends are throwing her a 30th S-themed birthday party and she's taking her shrimp costume for a weekend trip out of state to celebrate with them!

Mel: go buck wild and throw a grown up lady sleepover! While her family is across the world on a trip, Mel's hosting a few friends for a weekend slumber party! Ahhhhh!

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Hey HBs! We planned this as a two-parter because we knew we would need to obsess over every detail AND WE WERE RIGHT. We're recapping THE GIRL WITH STARS IN HER EYES by Xio Axelrod! It's a second chance, childhood-best-friends-to-lovers romance set in the music industry and ehrmegerd we're hooked.

Bonus Content: Mel's entire personality is gardening, this book has so much TEXTURE, you can hear the music and smell the smells and feel ALL the feels, Mel's rogue tampon, the blissful city of Tamtopia, and so much more!

Lady Loves

Sabrina: Go to the doctor! Sometimes you might think you know what's wrong, but it turns out a medical professional might know better. But also, get a second and third opinion if a doctor isn't listening to you.

Mel: @microflowerfarm on IG! Even if you don't care about flower farming, it's such a BEAUTIFUL account!

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