Highly Sensitive, Happily Married

070  As a sensitive woman, you likely love feeling connected to your significant other—and want to feel that way more often, yeah?

Trouble is, especially if you are married to a man, he may not be as into connecting in the ways you most love. He’d rather spend less time having deep talks and such, and more time doing other things. Or he outright resists spending time with you in the ways that bring you the emotional closeness you want…

Research shows this is a common difference between males and females.

Luckily, If this is the case in your relationship, you can still experience the connection you want. In this episode we talk about how.

We cover:

• The different ways, in general, males and females naturally connect.
  
  
• the one rule to follow to create satisfying connection for both of you.
  
  
• How to apply it step by step in daily life. 
  
  
• How to apply it when it comes to sex and physical intimacy. 
  
  
• Real life examples from clients and my own marriage that demonstrate how you can use this rule successfully.
  
  
• Why this naturally leads to more connection YOUR way.
  
  
• Stories of clients who use this to experience the emotional closeness they want with their partner.
  
  
• How to handle things when you feel you are the one compromising all the time, and he isn’t meeting you in the middle.
  
  
• Support to help you communicate about it all.
  
  

My clients and I use this “connection hack” to bring the emotional closeness we want with our husbands right into our marriages. Now you can, too! Listen in.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:
Grab  the Uplift Breath And Heart Coherence Guided Audio for a taste of connecting to connection!
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

If you’re considering getting professional support now or in the future for your marriage–or for anything related to your mental emotional well-being and life goals– you will want to understand what kind of support is best for you and your unique situation and goals.

I've seen too many women waste precious time, energy, money – and even lose hope in things changing in their marriages all together, simply because they didn’t understand when to choose a therapist for support, and when to hire a marriage coach…and so they chose the wrong type of professional support. 

Let’s not let that be you! This episode will clear things up for you.

Neither Coaching or Therapy (or Counseling) is better than the other. But both have their place, and each can be amazingly effective at their different goals. 

To maximize their benefit, get the changes you want, and not get discouraged, you need to educate yourself about the difference, and understand what they each work best for.

In this episode, I break that down for you, explain the difference between them, and help you identify what will be best for you, and perhaps your partner, to choose so you can have the best life and marriage possible.

If you’ve been considering working with me, definitely listen in to find out if I’d be the right choice for you in your situation. 

And even if you aren’t planning to find professional help right now, listen in so you can be educated to help point others in the right direction, listen to and follow the free content of right fit professionals for you, and get the best advice for your challenges and goals. 

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:
Blog post mentioned: Wondering If I Can Help YOU?
Set up your Consult to work with me.
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

068  Want some super actionable–and fun! – ways to bring more connection, trust, cooperation and a sense of synchrony into your relationship? (Of course you do, as a highly sensitive woman who loves feeling connected to the person you love! )Then you’ve got to listen in.

In this episode, we dive into how moving together is a powerful doorway to feeling closer, and how you can incorporate this research-backed understanding into your marriage starting today for a stronger connection for the rest of your lives.

We dive into:

• What I mean by “sharing motions” or “moving together”, and examples to try out
  
  
• A bit of the (fun and even laughter-inducing) science behind how sharing motions leads to sharing positive emotions
  
  
• How my clients and I have harnessed this knowledge to our and our husbands benefit
  
  
• A few of the best ways to communicate with your partner to get him on board to putting this into practice in your lives.
  
  
• And why if your husband isn't into this idea, there is no reason to despair, and still SO much that you can do to make sure a deep loving connection is at the heart of your marriage.
  
  

You’ll come away from this episode with a clear understanding of how you can use this “connection hack” to bring more love and joy into your marriage, and confidence that you can increase the intimacy you want between you and your significant other.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:
Free Ebook: The 7 Most Powerful Phrases To Deepen Connection
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

067  One of the biggest causes of discord, conflict, and the cycle of feeling less and less love and connection in a marriage is caused by what we call Assuming Negative Intent.

If you’ve ever had thoughts like: “My partner doesn’t care about me”, or "He’s just so irresponsible”, or “He doesn't value our marriage”, or “Xyz  [parenting, time together, a nice home] must not be as important to him as it is to me”, etc…

. . .you, too, assume negative intent. It happens for most –if not all– of us (especially as highly sensitive people).

The thing is, it happens automatically below the level of our conscious awareness –until we learn to catch it happening.

If we want a conflict-proof, secure, trust and love filled marriage, we’ve got to learn how to stop this automatic functioning of our brain from taking over, and learn how to assume positive intent. 

I lay out the basics for you here in this episode.

With a little bit of gentle discipline and effort, you can learn to work with your own mind in order to feel so much more at ease, cared for, and loved –and much better about your partner, too!

Dive in to guide your marriage into a realm of more understanding, acceptance, respect, compassion, and love.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:
Set up you consult call
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

066   This is for you if you feel disconnected, irritated, or resentful towards your partner, or you don’t like who you become sometimes in your communications with him, or you experience a lot more conflict than you’d like –or you just want to create some freshness and more intimacy with your significant other (and inside yourself!)

Our feelings lead to so much of how we interact and are reacted to in our marriages. I think of them as the FUEL in our marriage.

Certain ones naturally lead to great interactions, while other ones tend to lead to interactions that go south.

The best news is that we can generate the ones that serve us in our marriages on purpose. And curiosity is one of the best of them all. 

Curiosity is powerful in so many ways to make our marriage and lives better–especially when it comes to communicating and connecting with your partner.  

It fuels great listening, great self and other-understanding, great problem solving –and makes you way less likely to get reactive, judgmental, or walled off from each other. And it helps us, ultimately, have more intimacy and deep love for the real person our husband is, in all his humanness.

 Listen in to:

• Learn about the magic that curiosity offers you in your marriage  when it comes to  communication and connceting.
  
  
• Hear stories of others powerful use of it, 
  
  
• Be empowered to start tapping into it yourself, 
  
  
• Learn exactly how to begin doing so, and the 3 steps to bring it directly into your marriage
  
  
• And embark on the little challenge I offer you to make it a much more regular part of your life
  
  

 – so your marriage can reap the huge rewards it brings.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:
Post mentioned: Curiosity = More Understanding In Your Marriage
Set up Your consult
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

065  Often feel a little (or a lot) irritated, annoyed, disdainful or indignant, frustrated, exasperated, resentful or disappointed with your partner?  Or just generally hardened against this person you ultimately really want to feel soft and open to?

This is likely what I call “Should Pain.” 

Although very normal to the human brain, “should pain” is one of biggest barriers to love in our marriages. It feels bad to  both you and your partner when either of you are struggling with it.

Worse, it can run rampant for many of us when left unchecked, and lead to a culture between you and your significant other of disrespect, non-understanding, tension, and unhappiness.

Luckily, Should Pain is “curable”. From within yourself (Meaning, your hubby doesn’t need to do anything to make it go away. Super good news!). And the cure has to do with sensitivity –which you,  HSP friend, are a master of. 

So join me today as we dive into just what Should Pain is, where it comes from, and what you can do about it to begin to loosen it’s grip in your marriage, so you can feel open again to love and connection, communicate more effectively, and show up in a way you feel really good about.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:
Work With Hannah
website
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

064  Without knowing where we want to go, how can we ever get there? We can’t, at least not without a ton of meandering and getting lost along the way.

So having a clear vision of what you WANT in your marriage is always the very first step to creating it. 

I want you, my friend-- and all sensitive women who are in a partnership (or want to be) to have what they feel is an amazing relationship, an amazing marriage. 

And I bet you want that, too.

Creating that requires some learning and skill building, and also some UNLEARNING– of what we’ve been taught that doesn’t work.

So we need to start  with not just a vision, but a re-envisioning of how we want our marriages to be–one that takes into account the VERY REAL HUMANS we are, in this current moment in time.

In this episode, I offer you that: a re-envisioning of what an amazing marriage realistically looks like for us as sensitive humans. A vision that I’ve brought to life in my own marriage, and my clients have in theirs, too...

...It's a vision that YOU yourself can achieve with your partner, too!

Slow down and really take and SAVOR this one. It will be the start of a sea-change of more love, connection, support, and ease in your marriage. It will be the beginning of you making your  marriage one that gets more amazing for the rest of your life.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:
Work With Me
Link to blog post this was read from: The First Step To An Amazing Marriage
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

063  If interactions between you and your significant other are laced with negativity, even slightly….or if you just want to bring more connection and love in your relationship, this episode is for you. 

In it, I share one key thing (backed by decades of research) that you can do, or rule you can follow, to not just improve the culture in your marriage, but to maintain a strong loving relationship into the future. It’s so simple to keep in mind and to do. 

I break down

• The exact formula to follow 
• Why to do it
• Ways it could look in your marriage
• The most important thing to keep in mind
• How to take it all further 
• And how to make it come naturally.
  
  

Listen in to learn how to follow this important guideline that will help you steward your marriage back to love and happiness.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

Show Notes
 Website
Coach With Hannah
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

062  Today we dive into a 4 step formal process to release the urge to control your partner in the moment.

Because the cost of trying to control our partner in a marriage is intimacy –and feeling a whole lot of icky emotions, whereas releasing control is a huge step towards gaining more intimacy and harmony with your honey.

Yet, even if you intellectually know this, old habits die hard (and your human brain is naturally wired to want to control). So releasing control is easier said than done.

Which means it's really helpful to have a clear cut step-by-step process (a process that really zones in on all the feelings that drive control) that you can come back to over and over in any situation to help you decide whether or not you want to try to control, and if not, to release the urge right away.  

I lay out the 4 steps right here in this episode, and illustrate them with personal stories and work I’ve been doing around my own urges to control.   

This is the 3rd episode in a 3 part series on control in relationships, but it is also a stand alone episode. We do a quick review of why control causes more problems than rewards, what it looks like, why we aren’t bad for acting on our human urge to try to control our partner, and what actually serves us way better in our goal of having a loving, mutually respectful, connected marriage.

Join me to learn a process you can easily use if you’ve realized you’d prefer intimacy and harmony over following that impulse to try to control what really isn’t controllable anyway.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:

• Episode 37, How To Feel Safe To Feel Any Feeling
• Hannah's Website
• Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.

061  How can you have more genuine influence in your marriage and way more control over your experience of it? 

Today, I shed light on this as we continue our series on our human urge to control in our relationships.

In this episode, I offer you an important intermediary step you can take to be great at releasing control and ultimately creating MORE of the fulfillment, support, and authentic love you really want in your marriage

It can be totally life-shattering (in both good and not so comfortable ways) to finally get that we cannot control our significant other--and so much in our lives– that it was all just an illusion that brought us more pain than good. 

But as we accept this, we are able to open the door to more loving influence in both our own internal landscapes and our marriages (and other important relationships).

Listen in as I share a rarely talked about but important piece of this process,  illustrate it with a vulnerable story of my own, and offer you a chance to take this healing step yourself.

This episode will take you one healing step closer to connecting to deeper love and your capacity to actually influence things in the direction you’d love for them to go on your marriage.

ENJOYING THE SHOW?

• Get the HSHM Podcast Map, so you can quickly identify the episodes most helpful for your unique relationship, by supporting the podcast (for as little as $3) HERE. 
• Don’t miss an episode! Subscribe via Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or Stitcher.
• Leave  a review in Apple Podcasts--we are SO grateful!

SHOW NOTES:
Set Up Your Consult
Get More Free Support, Courses and Coaching HERE.