If you have experience with long-term relationships, you probably expect the wild passion of the beginning to fade over time.

It’s a bit of a trade off: You accept that in exchange for diminishing fireworks, you get the comfort and security that comes from being in a stable, committed relationship.

But what if you didn’t have to trade one for the other?

What if there was a way to keep the passion alive for years, decades, or forever?

In this episode, I take the work of Dr. Arthur Aron, a Research Professor of Psychology at Stony Brook University, and I add a framework that can increase the emotional connection you feel with your partner — and make it feel like it did in the beginning.

Aron is best known for a New York Times article that went viral a few years ago called, “To Fall in Love With Anyone, Do This,” which featured a list of 36 questions which, according to Aron, can provoke two strangers to fall in love.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

6 steps that create deeper intimacy between you and your partner.

The relationship skills that are most crucial to a fulfilling relationship.

The daily habits that will remind you of why you picked your partner in the first place (and fell in love!).

Xxoo Darcy

REFERENCES

Reis HT, Aron A. Love: What Is It, Why Does It Matter, and How Does It Operate? Perspect Psychol Sci. 2008 Jan;3(1):80-6. doi: 10.1111/j.1745-6916.2008.00065.x. PMID: 26158672.

https://news.berkeley.edu/2015/02/12/love-in-the-lab/

To Fall In Love With Anyone, Do this

36 questions

https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-contempt/#:~:text=can%20be%20defeated.-,Contempt%20is%20the%20worst%20of%20the%20four%20horsemen.,number%20one%20predictor%20of%20divorce.

Sun Therapy Lamp

CREDITS

This episode of “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” was produced by Darcy Sterling, with editorial support from Vicki Vergolina. Editing and sound engineering by Bart Migal. Our theme music is by Trending Music. Special thanks to Amanda Cristiani, Stephanie Sterling and Preston Smith. “We Need To Talk With Dr. Darcy Sterling” is a Sterling Standard Production.

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