In this episode, Frankie brings in a special guest, Fatin, who is also a Life Coach at MuscleCare Inc. If you want to book a coaching session with either Frankie or Fatin please go to www.iamperfectlyfrank.com for more info.
Special thanks to our sponsor Veterans Van Lines Moving Services "We Always Have Your Back." For more info go to https://veteransvanlines.com/
Frankie starts this episode with a quote from Jim Morrison sent to her from a friend: “People are afraid of themselves, of their own reality; their feelings most of all. People talk about how great love is, but that’s bullshit. Love hurts. Feelings are disturbing. People are taught that pain is evil and dangerous. How can they deal with love if they’re afraid to feel? Pain is meant to wake us up. People try to hide their pain. But they’re wrong. Pain is something to carry, like a radio. You feel your strength in the experience of pain. It’s all in how you carry it. That’s what matters. Pain is a feeling. Your feelings are a part of you. Your own reality. If you feel ashamed of them, and hide them, you’re letting society destroy your reality. You should stand up for your right to feel your pain.”
Fatin explains that oftentimes when she is experiencing pain she acts like things are okay because she doesn’t want to burden other people but suggests reaching out to someone because getting it out of our heads and talking it out relieves us. Frankie says her issue in life is opening her mouth and putting her foot into it. She often feels the pain of her own insecurities and has to have a conversation with herself to understand she is "Perfectly Frank" and she needs to feel comfortable with who she is. Frankie often calls Fatin for advice about her kids. People need other people, sometimes just to talk about the pain points in their lives. From Fatin’s experience, she suggests getting to the root of what the problem is and if you get to the root it will often take care of the problem. Fatin explains “fear stops you from everything and makes you feel alone and not good enough to do the things that you have desires in yourself to do. A lot of us are not living our full lives because of fear.”Frankie explains “love is freedom but also faith in knowing everything is going to be fine…if you are worried then you are not in love, you are in fear.”Fatin explains despite sometimes needing to open up and talk to others about an issue, she tries to sit by herself first to see what answers she comes to from within. Just asking the question “Why am I afraid?” changes something from within and often we get our own answers.Frankie goes on to describe negative mind chatter and how we need to reframe the messages we give to ourselves. Mind chatter is devastating when you are blaming and finding fault with yourself and we also need to learn how to be okay with ourselves and rise up despite the negative thoughts. Fatin’s advice is to use the gifts YOU have been given and not compare yourself to others. What do you need to make YOURSELF happy? Don’t waste your time trying to be someone else, often they aren’t who you think they are anyway. Frankie says we need to stop getting in the way of other people’s happiness by trying to get them to meet our expectations. Everyone is trying to figure out “how to do this thing called life” and we need to stop controlling others including our kids.