We spend a lot of our marriages thinking that “becoming one” means, "You'll become more like me. And once you become more like me, then we'll become one." Instead, what if you could say to your spouse, “I can love you just the way you are without having to change you.” If that’s the kind of oneness you want for your marriage (present or future), grab your Java and pull up a chair with Juli and Hannah.

Co-host: Hannah Nitz (@hannahnitz)

Follow-up Resources:

My Husband Isn’t My Best Friend (blog)

Join an Authentic Intimacy Online Book Study!

AI is changing the game when it comes to pornography—and it’s becoming more addictive and more dehumanizing than ever. This episode explores the impact of modern porn, including its ties to fantasy, gaming, and a distorted view of connection. If you or someone you love is navigating this journey, there is hope!

Guests: Jonathan Daugherty & Joel Warneking

Follow-up Resources:

• Join an Online Book Study! 

• Hot Topic Kit: Porn in Marriage (for AI Members)—not a member, get it here.

• Gateway to Freedom Intensive Workshop

• 423 Communities, 423 Podcast

The relationships you struggle with the most? This episode is for those. Juli sits down with Bible teacher Jada Edwards to share stories about the ways they’ve fallen short when it comes to loving others, and how God has transformed their understanding of what it means to love the way He does. (Spoiler alert: Sometimes the best way to learn love is to start with the person who bugs you the most.)

Guest: Jada Edwards (@jada_edwards)

Resources:

Sign up for our email list and stay in the know!

Jada’s book: A New Way to Love Your Neighbor

How to Have Tough Conversations (blog)

Encountering the Radical Love of Jesus (blog)

AI Members Only: Why “Love Is Love” Doesn’t Mean What You Think It Means, Ep. #401

Sadly, wrestling with pornography addiction is increasingly commonplace. But how do people find pornography? And why do they keep going back to it?

In the final of this series revisiting Reclaim, Troy and Melissa Haas of HopeQuest, share their testimony and expertise around pornography addiction, and what it takes to overcome it.

Guests: Troy and Melissa Haas

Troy and Melissa’s Website: hopequestgroup.org/

Troy and Melissa’s Instagram: @hopequestgroup

Partner financially with Authentic Intimacy!

Resource: #549 What the Latest Research Shows About Porn

Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Navigating the teenage years has never been easy, whether you’re the parent or the child. So as parents, how can you help your teenager or pre-teen have a better experience? What practically can you do to put them in a stronger position to navigate their teenage years safely, with more clarity about God’s love for them and design for their sexuality?

Three guests – James Talbert, Josh Miller, and Chelsey Nutgren – join Juli to share some much-needed practical advice for raising surrendered kids in our current cultural moment.

Guests: James Talbert, Josh Miller, Chelsey Nugteren

James’ Website: Citizens Akron

Josh’s Website: Riverwood Chapel Akron

Website: AXIS.org

Website: Center for Humane Technology

Resource Series:

1. Blog: Talking to Your Kids About Sex: Why, When, and How

2. Blog: 5 Reasons You’re Not Talking to Your Kids About Sex (and How to Overcome Them)

3. Blog: Sexual Integrity: The Heart of Sexually Discipling Your Kids

Find out more about donating to Authentic Intimacy.

Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

James 4:1 so famously writes, “What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you?”

It’s not surprising that marriage is a hotbed for conflict. When you live so closely with someone else, it’s easy to see their flaws, shortcomings, and mistakes in high definition.

So what can you do to stop constantly fighting?

In this special session from Reclaim 2024, Brad Rhoads shares what helped cut fighting and elevate fun in his marriage.

Guests: Brad Rhodes, Grace Marriage

Brad’s Website: gracemarriage.com

Brad’s Instagram: @grace_marriage

Blog: Forgiveness is Hard, Grace is Harder

Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

We’ve talked about the fact that many women struggle to ‘flip the switch’ and enjoy married sex, and we’ve talked about what might contribute to that. But we haven’t talked about what husbands can do to help their wives enjoy sex.

Juli shares a conversation from Gary Thomas’ Podcast where she was a panelist alongside Debra Fileta and Belah Rose.

Host: Gary Thomas

Featured Speakers: Dr. Juli Slattery, Debra Fileta, MA, LPC and Belah Rose

Gary’s Website: garythomas.com

Gary’s Newsletter: garythomasbooks.substack.com

Book: Married Sex by Gary Thomas and Debra Fileta, MA, LPC

Book: Rethinking Sexuality by Dr. Juli Slattery

Book: God, Sex and Your Marriage by Dr. Juli Slattery

Juli’s Website: authenticintimacy.com

Debra’s Website: debrafileta.com

Belah’s Website: delightyourmarriage.com

Please support Joy and Zack Skarka on GoFundMe

Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

There are so many challenges that come with leading a church well, especially when it comes to how to express their stance on Biblical sexuality. Many want to be a place where people can wrestle with the truth about God and sex and figure things out, while also being sure to prioritize biblical orthodoxy. How can they do both?

Pastor Evan Wickham, from Park Hill Church in San Diego, joins Juli to share lessons he’s learned and what his church is doing to lead biblically with clarity and love.

NOTE: We had some technical issues with recording this episode, but wanted to make sure you got to hear a great conversation--thanks for being patient with us!

Guest: Evan Wickham

Park Hill’s Instagram: @prkhllchrch

Evan’s Instagram: @evanwickham

Park Hill’s Website: parkhillsd.church

Join our email list!

Blog: Has God Changed His Mind About Sex?

Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

Historically, inside and outside the church, male sexuality has been talked about as a purely orgasm-driven experience.

But is it possible we have oversimplified the male sexual experience? What if there’s more to the way men think and feel about sex than we’ve previously considered?

 Dr. Corey Allan joins Juli for a very different conversation about male sexuality.

Guest: Dr. Corey Allan

Corey’s Website: smr.fm

Corey’s Instagram: @sexymarriageradio

Resource: Purity Culture Failed Men Too

Sign up for the email list!

Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.

As we work to change the purity narrative and undo many of its effects, we have to look at some of the continued harm it does to marriages. There’s still so much missing in the way Christian couples are taught about marital intimacy.

How can Christians celebrate the gift of sex that God gave in marriage?

Juli shares a conversation she had with the late Dr. Doug Rosenau, where he shared both what is missing and what is needed in the church when it comes to talking about the beauty of sex in marriage.

Guest: Dr. Doug Rosenau, Institute for Sexual Wholeness

Institute for Sexual Wholeness

Book: The Gift of Sex: A Guide to Sexual Fulfillment by Clifford and Joyce Penner

Book: A Celebration of Sex: A Guide to Enjoying God's Gift of Sexual Intimacy by Douglas E. Rosenau

Podcast: #543 How the Old Testament Reveals God’s Heart for Women, Sex, and Covenant Love

Transcript

00:00 - Introduction to Christian Sexuality Conversations

03:14 - The Church’s Perspective on Sex in Marriage

16:26 - Understanding Female Sexuality and Mutual Pleasure

29:13 - Nuancing Gender and Desire in Sexual Conversations

Java with Juli with Dr. Juli Slattery – Christian Discussions on Marriage, Sex and Singleness.