In which Elisabeth hacks the Matrix; Magneto is the worst at small talk; Hela overreaches; parents just don’t understand human speech; everything is better with super-rings; Selene has a Xena moment; almost anything can be solved with a kiss; and even if you transform Doug Ramsey into a giant red murder monster, he’ll still be a huge nerd.

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NEXT EPISODE: Different Nazis

Miles here – in one of the questions for this episode, I conflated asexuality and aromanticness. Those are totally two different things. Apologies – I’m still learning!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

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In which you really can’t compete with Cable; the X-Men may or may not ditch a funeral; Nanny extrudes the grappling arms; Boom Boom is more responsible than she looks; Jean Grey is the cool stepmom; we posit an alternate explanation for Brexit; and ravens are the best dinosaurs.

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NEXT EPISODE: Miles and Elisabeth X-Plain New Mutants Forever!

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In which Gossamyr definitely probably doesn’t get blown up; we engage in a long and surprisingly canon-based exploration of Hellfire Club bathroom etiquette; the New Mutants break up with Magneto; you should probably never go swimming in the Marvel Universe; and it is possible (but unlikely) that Jay yells “IMPERIUS REX” more than is strictly necessary.

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NOTE: The Dispossessed is in fact by Ursula K. Le Guin.

NEXT EPISODE: Trolls!

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In which Jubilee makes her fabulous debut, the X-Ladies visit Hotbods, the X-Dudes accidentally (and drunkenly) save the world, Longshot is Sexy Johnny Karate, the only thing worse than one anti-mutant super-robot is two, and we say goodbye to a quarter of the team.

X-PLAINED:

NEXT EPISODE: The New Mutants drop out.

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No illustration this week, but David Wynne‘s art will be back next episode!

In which Jay and Max brave the X-Men anime; the problem isn’t in Wolverine’s pants; Xavier is for once less villainous than he seems; Emma Frost gets ruffly; Cyclops wasn’t even supposed to be here today; and we both really want to hang out with Scott Porter.

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NEXT EPISODE: Jubilee!

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In which Havok and Wolverine head to Mexico; Havok tries his hand at noir; Wolverine gets serious about hair gel; Meltdown is probably not actually a common Russian surname; Susan X-Plains nuclear reactors; and we are pretty thoroughly besotted with Havok & Wolverine: Meltdown.

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NEXT EPISODE: The X-Men Anime

Special thanks to guest reactor X-Pert Susan Beaver!

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CONTENT NOTE: Episode 113 contains fairly extensive discussions of fictional violence, including gun violence. If you don’t want to listen to that right now, that is absolutely okay. If you want to listen to it later, it’ll still be here. And if you never want to listen to it, that is absolutely okay, too.

We were on the fence about whether to post this episode today. We ultimately decided to go ahead, for two reasons:

There’s value in routine in the face of tragedy.

There are times when continuing to exist visibly and publicly is itself an act of defiance.

Love and solidarity to everyone who’s grieving right now, and especially to our Florida friends and family, and to fellow members of the queer community.

-Jay & Miles

EPISODE 113: PLAY IT AGAIN, PATCH

In which Wolverine gets an ongoing series; the constitution of Madripoor is probably just a list of pulp noir genre conventions; Tyger Tiger is a kinder, gentler crimelord; Jessica Drew gets possessed a lot; the Silver Samurai and Lindsay McCabe are our dream team; Joe Fixit is a font of endless delight; and someone should probably sit Wolverine down and explain how disguises work.

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NEXT EPISODE: Havok & Wolverine: Meltdown!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

In which we cover (almost) all of the Inferno tie-ins with the help of writer Sam Humphries; the Marvel Universe used to be really X-Centric; Jarvis is unstoppable; Daredevil fights a vacuum cleaner; it’s probably best not to ask about the whole Celestial Madonna thing; Power Pack gets incredibly upsetting; working in comics makes you appreciate crossovers on a whole new level; and we’d all really have liked to have seen Guy Davis’s Inferno.

X-PLAINED:

NEXT EPISODE: So. Much. Wolverine.

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!

In which we release a mid-week bonus episode and generally spoil the hell out of X-Men: Apocalypse!

This episode comes courtesy of our rad Patreon subscribers. If you want to join their ranks and help keep us on the air and ad-free–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

In which Wolverine gets a wolverine; the Crazy Gang meets their match; Inferno is business as usual for Excalibur; Alan Davis covers are the best covers; David Wynne makes his on-air debut; Courtney Ross is more competent than you; Murderworld operates on a dubious economic model; Nightcrawler is the anti-Nice Guy™, and everything basically works out for the best.

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NEXT WEEK: Infero Post-Game, with Sam Humphries

Special thanks to David Wynne.

You can find a visual companion to this episode on our blog!

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Jay and Miles X-Plain the X-Men is 100% ad-free and listener supported. If you want to help support the podcast–and unlock more cool stuff–you can do that right here!

Buy prints of this week’s illustration at our shop, or contact David Wynne for the original!