Just Be Cousins

MY WEBHOST WENT DOWN AND WE LOST THIS POST SO AM I REPOSTING I’M SORRY I WROTE SOMETHING BRILLIANT IN THIS SPACE BUT NOW ITS LOST THESE ARE REAL TEARS NO SERIOUSLY.

Welcome to the podcast this week’s guest: Moonshine Pete. He voted for Trump. On purpose. And he was sober. I know, right? MsP makes some good points, and Jason rants like some kind of alt-centrist rally marcher equipped with a soggy paper megaphone and some scented tiki candles. Good times!

This is the book episode where we discuss tomes and tomage, and the nature of publishing in our hyper-forward world of electronic convenience. What passes for literacy? We don’t use the word “balderdash” or “conflagration” at any point in this episode, but we do sound like robots besieged by spotty bandwidth. Sorry, Katy.

Another random episode where we talk very specifically about Macho Man Randy Savage, Improv, and how good we are making a bad podcast. If you only listen to one episode of our podcast, and it’s this one, then you won’t have not heard it. That’s a guarantee, jimbo.

Nicknames. Did you know “nickname” is a nickname for the word sobriquet? What’s your porn name? Your wrestling name? Your roller derby name? Do YOU know how Facebook advertising works? And which season was the one where Jon Snow didn’t know anything according to that redhead from Downton Abbey, you know, the one with the guy was the Beast in the Beauty and the Beast who, in fact, had horns? What’s the deal with conviction? It’s scary is what it is.

Our brains have shat down. We’re tired. Life! The only thing that gets us through is music. So we going to talk about music. 27 times. What is it about the number 27? Something about Jim Carey if I’m not mistaken. Okay not really. Anyway. ROCK!

The two boys are three for a night, with featured guest Tim the Timedian, the funniest mo-fo on the East Coast. Mo fo stayed up past midnight to record this pile of dog’s saliva! This is the comedy episode. We talk about comedy. Also Joe obscenitizes a John Cougar. Before he was Mellencamp. Not sure if I spelled that right. Aw who cares, not like he’s gonna listen to this anyway.

The sports episode. We talk about sports. We talk about running, football, racquetball, fantasy hack-sack, tommy john’s surgery. And also a certain move you can do with your little batter and your lady’s fun globes. And do I need to say speed bag nut sack? No, I don’t think I do.

This is what happens when we are too lazy to prepare: we talk about drugs. And music, of course, because don’t we always? Ian Sane joins us once more, and tells some stories. Oh, and, full disclosure: I get Georgia O’Keefe confused with Flannery O’Conner. It’s Ministry’s and Vicodin’s fault.

Are you emotional? Probably not. You have total control over your feelings. You’re a stoic. You’re a robot. But not us. We’re emotional messes, and we really need to figure ourselves out, like, now, before we do more unfortunate things to chimichangas. And gorditas. And chalupas? Oh god, the things we’ve done to chalupas.