If you are one of the many subscribers to the Peloton exercise/media network, you may already be familiar with Kendall Toole. For many years, she was one of the stars of Peloton, exhorting users to push themselves harder, sweat more, and pursue their goals. In those cases, Kendall was positive, cheerful, always with a smile and kind words. But people are complicated and the truth is that Kendall has faced many mental health issues over the course of her life, including depression, anxiety, OCD, and suicidality. She’s in a better place now (she considers her conditions to be not cured but managed) but in an honest and moving interview, Kendall tells of her brush with suicidal ideation in college, her long stretch of depression that followed, and the words of her father that helped pull her toward a better place. You’re knocked down, he said, but never knocked out.

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Help is available right away.

The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 988 or 1-800-273-8255, 1-800-273-TALK

Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741.

International suicide hotline numbers available here: https://www.opencounseling.com/suicide-hotlines