Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Friendship Advice for Kids (K-8)

Ep. 48 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Attraction versus closeness

Lily wonders how to understand a friend who claims instant intimacy.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit. (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:

- In your own words, how would you describe the difference between attraction and closeness?

- Have you ever had someone try to influence you by saying, “I’ll be your best friend…” or “I won’t be your best friend…”? What did they want you to do? How did you respond?

- Have you ever met someone and immediately thought, “We’re going to be good friends!” Did you end up becoming close friends? Why or why not?

- How could saying something like “No thanks” or “I’m not comfortable doing that” deepen your friendship?

For a formatted TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Ep. 47 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Friends matter. Here's why.

We all know friends are important, but Brayden wants to know why. In this week’s episode, I spell out some research findings about the importance of friends and also some ideas about how to be a good friend.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit. (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- Why do you think having good friends makes it easier for kids to cope with stress? How has a friend been kind or helpful to you when you’ve had to deal with difficult situations?

- How can too much conflict hurt a friendship?

- Why do you think kids sometimes stick with a low-quality friendship (where there’s a lot of conflict and not much fun or closeness)?

- What are some examples of things you’ve done to support or care for a friend?

- Think of a time you had a friendship rough spot. How did you handle it?

- Dr. Friendtastic says that learning to be a good friend “is a step toward peace and justice in the world.” Do you agree? Why or why not?

For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Ep. 46 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Building closer friendships

When they see that other kids paired off with a best friend, and they don’t have one, kids can feel like they’re missing out. Anna wants to know what she can do to get a best friend.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit. (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- Who do you consider your closest friends? How did you become close?

- Has anyone ever said to you, “I’ll be your best friend if you..”? If so, how did that make you feel? Why is this NOT a good way to make close friends?

- What do you think Dr. Friendtastic means when she says, “Friends are people, not possessions”? (Hint: She also talks about building a close friendship together, with time and effort.)

- Why do you think Dr. Friendtastic likes the term “close friend” more than “best friend”?

- Thinking about the kids you know now, who is someone you’d like to become closer friends with? How could you do that?

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Ep. 45 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Gets angry at classmates

Reid asks about a common problem: getting mad at his peers. Hear what does–and doesn’t–work to manage anger.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit. (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For a TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- Think of a recent time that you felt angry with another kid. What happened? How did you handle it?

- What are some reasons why it’s not a good idea to act rough when you’re angry? (Hint: How are other people likely to react? How would you feel about yourself?)

- Why do you think crossing your arms and taking two steps back are the first steps for emergency coping with anger? (Hint: what might that prevent?

- Dr. Friendtastic lists a bunch of possible distraction strategies to use for emergency coping with anger, including saying the alphabet in your mind, counting by even numbers, doing math, or remembering the words to a song. Which of these would you like to try,? What else could you do to distract yourself when you’re mad?

- The coping thoughts that Dr. Friendtastic mentions, such as “I don’t like this, but I can handle it,” recognize that the situation is hard AND that you can cope with it. What coping statements do you think might be useful for you to think about when you start to feel angry?

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Ep. 44 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Being true to our authentic self

Vera wants to know if we have to change ourselves to make friends.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit. (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- Think about yourself two or three years ago. How have you changed? How have you stayed the same?

- Have you ever been in a situation where you thought you had to hide your real self from other kids? What made you think you had to do that? How did the other kids react? How did you feel while doing it or after doing it? 

- Describe some times when you’ve done something that wasn’t exactly what you wanted because you cared about a friend. How did your friend respond? How did you feel while doing it or after doing it? 

- Dr. Friendtastic says friendship is about knowing and caring for each other. What do you think that means in terms of what you should do or not do to build a close friendship with another kid? Why do we need both ingredients, knowing and caring, for friendship?

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Ep. 43 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Learning to say “No.”

Beatrix somehow agreed to let her friend snip a tiny bit of her hair but was shocked when the friend cut a big chunk! How can she protect her hair and the friendship?

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/  (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- Have you ever had a situation where you went along with what a friend wanted but later regretted it? What happened? How did you handle it with your friend?

- Why do you think it’s sometimes hard to say no to a friend?

- Why do you think friends sometimes don’t listen or keep arguing after they’ve heard no?

- Have you ever felt envious of a friend–wishing you had something they do or could be more like them? What did you envy? How did it affect your friendship?

- If you were in Beatrix’s situation, would you be able to forgive a friend who cut more of your hair than you expected? Why or why not?

Books mentioned in the podcast: Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic

Ep. 42 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: How to Be a Good Friend.

In this year-end wrap-up, Dr. Friendtastic describes 4 areas of friendship that are necessary for becoming a good friend.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ 

(Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- What are some ways that you are a good friend? (Hint: what do you do to show your friends you like and care about them?)

- Why is it sometimes hard to be a good friend?

- Thinking about the different friendship areas Dr. Friendtastic highlighted, fun, support, closeness, and handling conflicts, which do you think is the hardest to do well? Why?

- What could you do to try to become an even better friend? (Think about all the areas and questions mentioned in the podcast episode.)

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic

Ep. 41 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Understanding and communicating about boundaries.

Tessa wonders how to handle things when her friends don’t respect her boundaries.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ 

(Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- Describe a time when someone crossed a boundary of your. Why do you think they did that? How did you handle it?

- Dr. Friendtastic said, “Good boundaries can save friendships.” What does that mean? What could happen if you don’t talk with your friends about boundaries?

- Communicating about your communication can be difficult. How do you think your friends would react if you said, ““I’ve asked you twice to stop, but you keep doing that. What’s going on?” Why might it be a good idea to ask “What’s going on?” rather than just yelling at them? (Hint: how is your friend likely to respond to those comments?

- If a friend crosses your boundaries, does that mean the friendship has to end? What oculd you do instead? Boundaries can vary depending on the situation, our culture, and our relationship with others. Sometimes they even chage over time. What are some good ways to figure out what someone else’s boundaries are?

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic

Ep. 40 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Imagining the feelings behind wild behavior.

Vihaan’s brother is his best friend, but sometimes he acts wild. How can Vihaan handle this?

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ 

(Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- Have you been around a friend or sibling who acts wild? What do you think helps or doesn’t help in that situation?

- Has anyone told you that you were acting too wild? What feelings were behind your wild behavior? (In other words, how were you feeling at that time?)

- Dr. Friendtastic explained that there are a bunch of different reasons why someone might be acting wild, including being overexcited, not wanting the fun to end, feeling lonely or bored, or feeling frustrated. Why do you think it’s important to figure out why smeone is acting wild?

- When should you try to handle a friend or sibling’s misbehavior by yourself, and when should you get a grown-up involved?

- What does Dr. Friendtastic mean when she says, “Winning and losing only last about two seconds”? Why is that an important thing to understand?

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic

Ep. 39 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Dealing with jealousy about a friend’s other friend.

Maya wants to know how to reconnect with a friend who seems to have moved on to a new best friend.

Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ 

(Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)

For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/

DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

- Have you ever been in a situation like Maya’s, where you felt jealous of a friend’s other friend? What happened? How did you handle it?

- Dr. Friendtastic mentions three things that would NOT help in this situation: yelling at the friend, being mean to the new friend, and trying to divide the friend evenly. Why do you think those would NOT be good choices? (Hint: How would they make the friend feel?)

- Why is it important to try to be “good company” when you’re with a friend, so they enjoy being with you? What are some ways to be good company?

- What are some reasons why it’s good to have more than one friend?

Books mentioned in the podcast:

Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/

Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/

Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com

Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.

Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic