Laughing with Myself

Melissa laughs about never using dishwashers, buying a huge hamster wheel like bookcase, why runners run on main streets, and her ultimate comeback on Insta.

Melissa laughs at the thought of buying lingerie, how back in high school she had a slobbery first kiss and how weird she was with her crushes. Oh and she sings some good ol' 10CC and Whitney Houston. 

Melissa laughs about her old parody song "Waiting Fart Tonight," how focus music on Spotify is too intense, and the tamale Penny found on her walk. 

Melissa laughs about how amazed the folks are that move into Tiny Houses, paper smells, and licking a page in her science book in 4th grade. 

Melissa laughs about her shark she made in high school, how she wouldn't go on a hot air balloon with a funny person, and how she is the queen of parallel parking.

Melissa laughs about her old Bilbo Baggins impression, her idea of one chair in movie theaters, and her recent obsession of making fairy doors. 

Melissa laughs about adults wanting gifts, the crazy amount of passwords we have to memorize, and wtf is a sim id number, and how rude Kevin McCallister is to the pigeon lady. 

Melissa laughs at leaning into feeling ugly, Celine Dion’s cover of “Feliz Navidad” and the surprises ladies leave in restroom stalls. 

Melissa laughs about the music that plays when she’s put on hold, how she doesn’t want old rotten breath, and how it rocks to date a Dad! 

Melissa laughs about mall Santa’s being sad at home this year, her call to the Kost 103.5 Santa, and how board game instructions fill her with rage.