Make More Love

In this episode of Make More Love, Ellen Dorian introduces the Relationship Energy Spectrum and shows how your emotional state shapes the quality of your relationship. If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing everything “right” but still feel disconnected, this episode will help you identify the key obstacles to happiness and show you how to shift your energy to create a stronger, more fulfilling relationship.

• The Relationship Multiplier Effect: Happiness isn’t just personal—it’s relational.
• Why men enter relationships seeking happiness, yet often feel unfulfilled.
• The Relationship Drive Matrix: Our core motivations for relationships—seeking pleasure, avoiding pain, wanting connection, and avoiding isolation.

• The Achievement Trap: Men are conditioned to believe success = happiness, but external success doesn’t automatically create internal fulfillment.
• Emotional Suppression: Many men are raised to suppress emotions, making it hard to even recognize happiness when it happens.
• Social Resistance: Expressing too much happiness can trigger negative reactions, reinforcing stoic or disengaged behaviors.
• Uncle Joe’s Story: A real-life example of how unchecked resentment and emotional suppression can impact a man’s life and relationships.

• Flow State (Engaged Positive Energy): The ideal—high engagement, positive energy, deep connection.
• Battle Stations (Engaged Negative Energy): High engagement, but in constant conflict—resentment, arguing, keeping score.
• Comfort Zone (Disengaged Positive Energy): Coasting along, no real problems, but no spark or growth either.
• Loveless Limbo (Disengaged Negative Energy): No engagement, no positive energy—emotional disconnection and slow deterioration.

• Many men struggle with happiness because they've been conditioned to link it to external achievements. Success doesn’t automatically lead to fulfillment, and chasing goals without addressing internal happiness can leave you feeling empty.
• If you can’t identify happiness, you can’t cultivate it. Decades of emotional suppression and societal expectations can make it difficult for men to recognize, express, and sustain genuine happiness.
• Mapping where you stand in the Relationship Energy Spectrum is the first step to change. Once you know whether you’re in Flow State, Battle Stations, the Comfort Zone, or Loveless Limbo, you can take intentional steps toward shifting your energy and engagement in the relationship.

Over the next few days, pay attention to how you’re showing up in your relationship:

Are you engaged or disengaged?

Are you bringing positive or negative energy?

No judgment—just observe.

Need support? Set up a free Relationship Reset Call with Ellen at relationshipresetcall.com to get a clear path forward.

So far in this series on happiness, we’ve covered some big ideas. We started with how happiness affects relationships—how your personal fulfillment fuels connection, intimacy, and long-term passion. Today, we tackled what happiness actually is and how to identify it, breaking down the obstacles that make it hard for men to recognize, express, and experience happiness in their relationships.

Next week, we’ll get into the practical side—how to cultivate happiness for yourself, so you’re not just waiting for it to happen, but actively creating a life that feels fulfilling and energizing.

I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. Is happiness an important topic for you? What questions do you have? What would you like to hear more about? Is there anything you agree or disagree with? I want you in on the conversation. Send me an email, drop into the P3 Insider’s Community, or set up a free Relationship Reset Call if you want to dig into your specific situation one-on-one.

And don’t forget—if you’re enjoying the series, hit follow, leave a review, or share this episode with someone who needs to hear it.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com

In this episode of Make More Love, Ellen kicks off a new series on happiness—what it actually is, why it matters, and how it plays into having a fulfilling, passionate relationship.

She tackles one of the biggest myths in relationships: "Happy Wife, Happy Life."

What’s the real truth about happiness in relationships?

Ellen introduces the Relationship Multiplier Effect, explaining why happier men tend to have happier wives. She shares client stories, expert insights, and real strategies for building happiness that fuels passion, connection, and fulfillment in relationships.

• Many men believe their role is to make their wife happy—and that doing so will result in a happy marriage.
• A 2014 study found that a wife’s unhappiness is more likely to lead to divorce, but a husband’s unhappiness doesn’t have the same impact.
• This leads to the wrong conclusion—that a man’s happiness doesn’t matter in a relationship.
• The truth: Men and women experience happiness differently. Men tend to compartmentalize and shift focus to work or hobbies when unhappy, while women connect their emotional well-being directly to the relationship.
• This misunderstanding is why so many men get blindsided by divorce.

• Ellen shares a real-life example from a client, JQ, who followed the "Happy Wife, Happy Life" model.
• He built the life his wife wanted, assuming that her happiness would bring them both fulfillment.
• The reality? He lost sight of what made him happy, working long hours to maintain a lifestyle that didn’t bring him joy.
• When he finally faced a personal crisis, he realized he no longer knew what happiness even looked like.

• Happier men tend to have happier wives.
• When you focus on your own fulfillment, you create a positive feedback loop in your relationship.
• Happiness spreads. Misery spreads. Which do you want in your relationship?
• A fulfilled man is more attractive, emotionally strong, and less demanding of validation.
• Happiness creates more presence, passion, and engagement, leading to stronger intimacy and connection.

• You can’t delegate happiness. You’re responsible for your own.
• Sacrificing your happiness doesn’t create a happy relationship—it creates burnout, resentment, and disconnection.
• Happiness in relationships is a multiplier—when you invest in your own fulfillment, it naturally strengthens your connection with your partner.

• What makes you happy?
• If you don’t know the answer, you won't want to miss the next episode.
• If you’re ready to take action in your relationship, book a free Relationship Reset Call with Ellen. Let’s get you moving in the right direction.
• Join the Passionate Partners Insider Community on Facebook for exclusive content and resources.

Happiness isn’t a luxury— it’s the foundation of every thriving, passionate relationship.

Your personal fulfillment is directly tied to the strength of your relationship. When you feel energized, when you feel engaged, when you feel alive—your relationship reflects that back to you.

If you’ve spent years focused on making everyone else happy while ignoring your own needs, then your relationship is going to feel the weight of that. And at some point, your partner will, too.

When was the last time you thought about what actually makes you happy? If you don’t know, that’s okay. That’s exactly what we’re tackling next time. Because before you can build a fulfilling life and relationship, you need to reconnect with yourself.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com

Date night should be something you both look forward to—not a routine obligation that fizzles out over time. In this episode, we revisit the best strategies for making date night exciting, meaningful, and passion-fueled. Learn how to break out of the "dinner and a movie" rut, create unforgettable experiences, and make date nights work for your relationship dynamic.

If you’re ready to level up your date nights and reignite that spark, this episode is for you!

• Many couples fall into a predictable routine that makes date nights feel like just another task.
• The biggest mistakes include:
• Repeating the same experiences without variety.
• Making date night feel like an obligation instead of an opportunity.
• Treating it as a bid for sex rather than a time for deepening connection.

Solution: The key to better date nights isn’t just spontaneity—it’s thoughtful planning with the right emotional elements.

Three phases:

1. Anticipation – Build excitement beforehand with playful teasing, surprises, and shared expectations.
2. Experience – Stay present, minimize distractions, and focus on your partner’s enjoyment.
3. Afterglow – Keep the emotional connection going beyond the night itself.

The 5 Emotional Elements That Elevate Date Night:

1. Fire – Create sexual tension and attraction.
2. Intensity – Deepen emotional and physical connection.
3. Immersion – Build a private "love bubble" where only the two of you exist.
4. Resonance – Show your partner they are seen, heard, and understood.
5. Harmony – Sync up with each other’s energy to create a natural flow.

Avoid the same-old routine by mixing up date types:

1. Romantic Date – Classic candlelit dinners, dancing, and celebrations.
2. Relaxed Date – Low-key nights at home, movie marathons, cooking together.
3. Reminiscing Date – Recreate your first date or revisit meaningful places.
4. Recreational Date – Physical activity like hiking, biking, or dancing.
5. Reaching Out Date – Volunteering or working on a cause together.
6. Risk-Taking Date – Trying something new or adventurous.
7. Reconciliation Date – Strategic dates to rebuild connection after conflict.

1. Date nights don’t have to be extravagant—but they do need to be intentional.
2. Vary your date types to keep the spark alive.
3. Use emotional elements to elevate the experience and make your partner feel truly connected to you.

Book a Free Relationship Reset Call – Need help improving your relationship? Grab a 15-minute strategy call at relationshipresetcall.com.

Join the Passionate Partners Insider Community – Get exclusive content, resources, and support from like-minded individuals.

Follow & Subscribe – Never miss an episode! Hit follow on your favorite podcast platform and leave a review to help spread the word.

Date nights can be a game-changer in your relationship—when done right. By incorporating these strategies, you can create dates that fuel connection, passion, and intimacy, bringing you and your partner closer than ever.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com

Marriage is already an absurd idea when you think about it—so why do we get so serious about keeping it running smoothly? In this episode, Ellen introduces the Absurdity Principle of Relationship Growth and dives into three ways to inject more fun into your relationship.

If your relationship feels routine, predictable, or just too serious, these approaches will break you out of your comfort zone, increase connection, and make your relationship more exciting again.

• Why long-term relationships naturally become too serious—and how that kills connection.
• The big mistake couples make when they try to fix a stale relationship with logic.
• The Absurdity Principle: Why embracing the ridiculousness of lifelong commitment is the key to making it work.
• Rate your relationship’s fun level—if it’s below a 7, you need this episode.

1. The Surrender Date – Letting go of control leads to the best experiences.

• One partner plans everything—location, outfits, food, activities. The other just goes along for the ride.
• Why it works: Builds trust, creates surprise and excitement, and shakes up the usual relationship dynamic.
• Ideas to try: Blindfolded Outfit Challenge, Trying a Completely New Activity, or Over-the-Top Themed Date Night.

2. Whose Line Couples Edition – Improv your way to better connection.

• Inspired by Whose Line Is It Anyway?, this game-based approach adds humor, novelty, and unpredictability into your relationship.
• Game options:
• Questions Only – Every response must be a question!
• Scenes From a Hat – Act out funny, flirty, or ridiculous scenarios.
• Props – Grab an object and invent as many crazy uses for it as possible.
• Want more scenes? Download the free list of 25 Couples Scenes From a Hat! [https://passionatepartnersproject.com/25-scenes-from-a-hat/]

3. Try Something Physical – Movement boosts connection, attraction, and chemistry.

• Ideas include: Couples dance classes, roller skating, sexy partner workouts, or even body painting.
• Why it works: Moving together builds chemistry in ways that words can’t.

People may not stop loving each other—but they often stop having fun together.

You don’t just fall into playfulness—you have to create it.

Trying something new together shakes up routines and reintroduces attraction.

Pick one approach and try it this week. DM Ellen or tag her in the P3 Insider's Community with your best moment!

Want more fun ideas? Grab the free Scenes From a Hat download at [YourLandingPage.com]!

Need help making this work? Book a free Relationship Reset Call with Ellen at relationshipresetcall.com

"We all want fun, exciting, and playful relationships, but fun doesn’t just happen. You have to make space for it. You have to create it. And yeah, sometimes that takes effort. But wasn’t planning fun dates exciting when you first started dating? It was work, but it was high-reward work."

Start small – Pick just one playful thing this week.

Schedule it if you have to – Spontaneity is a myth; even early dating was planned.

Push through the awkwardness – Fun feels weird at first, but it gets easier the more you do it.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.

Download 25 Scenes from a Hat for Couples Here:

https://passionatepartnersproject.com/25-scenes-from-a-hat/

www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

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Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

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SUMMARY:

If you didn't listen to last week's Valentine’s Day Special—or you listened but didn’t take action—there’s a chance you’re going to be in the doghouse. And if that’s the case, you’re going to need a plan to get out.

In this episode, Ellen breaks down what the doghouse really is (hint: it’s not just about being in trouble), why it happens, how to recognize the warning signs, and, most importantly, how to get out and stay out—for good.

You’ll meet Bill, a VIP client who found himself in the doghouse without a clue. And, you’ll learn how to prevent disconnection, build stronger communication, so you can retire the doghouse dynamic from your relationship permanently.

Part 1: What Is the Doghouse and Why Does It Happen?

• The doghouse isn’t just about being in trouble—it’s an emotional space where one partner withdraws due to unmet expectations, unresolved frustrations, or a perceived lack of priority.
• How disconnection builds over time and why it can sneak up on high-performing men who are laser-focused on their careers.
• The "Friend Test" analogy: How relationship withdrawal mirrors friendships that fade when effort isn’t reciprocated.

Part 2: Case Study—Bill’s Story

• Bill, a VIP Client, shares his frustration about constantly ending up in the doghouse without knowing why.
• A deep dive into Bill’s missed bids for connection: an overlooked vacation plan and neglected smoke detector batteries—small actions that sent unintended messages to his wife.
• The realization: It’s often not about what you did, but what you didn’t do.

Part 3: How to Get Out—and Stay Out—of the Doghouse

• Ellen helps Bill align his actions with his intentions, track his commitments, and initiate a direct conversation to eliminate the doghouse dynamic.
• She lays out five actionable strategies to avoid disconnection and build a stronger relationship:

1) Recognize and respond to bids for connection.

2) Acknowledge and fulfilled promises.

3) Take immediate action on something small.

4) Open the conversation about the doghouse.

5) Establish regular check-ins.

• The doghouse isn’t a punishment—it’s a sign of disconnection.
• Small, repeated disappointments add up and push your partner to withdraw.
• The way out isn’t grand gestures—it’s consistent, meaningful action and open communication.
• You can’t fix what you don’t see, so learning to recognize your partner’s needs and following through is key to keeping your relationship strong.

So, as we wrap up this episode, ask yourself:

• What’s one small thing I can do today to reconnect with my partner?
• Where have I been missing bids for connection—and how can I start noticing them?
• How can I be more intentional about following through on my commitments?

 The doghouse isn’t just about being "in trouble"—it’s about disconnection. It happens when small disappointments, forgotten promises, and missed bids for connection pile up over time. If you’re in the doghouse, it probably didn’t happen overnight, and it won’t go away on its own. But you have the power to change it.

You can’t read your partner’s mind, but you can show up consistently, pay attention, and follow through on the things that matter to them.

Relationships aren’t about perfection—they’re about making each other feel seen, heard, valued and loved.

If you're stuck the doghouse, you don’t have to stay there. Book a free Relationship Reset Call with Ellen at relationshipresetcall.com. In just 15 minutes, you’ll get clear on what’s going on in your relationship and walk away with one or two actionable steps to start making real progress.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email.

Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

And if you found this episode helpful, help us spread the word—hit subscribe, leave a review, and share this episode with a friend who might need it.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com

In this Valentine’s Day special episode, Ellen Dorian dives into the history, meaning, and modern-day pressures of the holiday. Whether listeners are diehard romantics or Valentine’s Day cynics, Ellen provides practical advice and creative ideas to help them plan a day that fits their relationship. From understanding their partner’s expectations to avoiding last-minute stress, this episode is packed with insights to make Valentine's Day a meaningful and stress-free experience.

Part 1: Understanding Valentine's Day

• A look at the origins of the holiday, including its rebellious roots in ancient Rome.
• Why Valentine’s Day can feel commercialized and how shifting perspectives can help.
• The significance of aligning with or acknowledging a partner's attachment to the day.

Part 2: Meeting Relationship Expectations

• The importance of understanding a partner’s expectations for Valentine's Day.
• The consequences of ignoring the holiday if it's important to one partner.
• Two options: setting clear boundaries or using the holiday to strengthen the relationship.

Part 3: Planning a Personalized Valentine’s Day

Strategies for different types of relationships:

• Partners who are indifferent to the holiday.
• Partners who want something special but aren’t tied to traditions.
• Traditionalists who expect classic Valentine’s Day elements (roses, chocolates, fancy dinner).

• Understanding how a partner feels about romantic gestures can prevent miscommunication and disappointment.
• Thoughtful, personalized efforts go a long way in building a stronger, more affectionate relationship.
• Planning ahead ensures less stress, fewer mistakes, and a better overall experience.

Listeners can download the Ultimate Valentine’s Day Planning Kit to get a head start on their planning. The kit includes a timeline, curated gift ideas, and a planner to keep everything organized.

Download it now

Ellen encourages listeners to take one small step to elevate their next Valentine’s Day, whether this year’s celebration is a hit or a lesson learned. Showing a partner that they are understood and appreciated strengthens intimacy, affection, and resilience in the relationship.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com

In the final episode of our Avoiding Divorce series, Ellen explores what happens when couples no longer want the same things in life. She breaks down the three main reasons this misalignment occurs, the emotional dynamics that make it worse, and the three principles to help get your relationship back on track. This is about rediscovering or even defining, for the first time, a shared vision for your future—one that keeps you and your partner aligned, connected, and moving forward together.

Ellen explains how many divorces are driven by couples who say, "We just didn’t want the same things anymore."

3 Reasons for misalignment:

• Goals and priorities diverge over time.
• There was never a shared vision to begin with.
• One partner drastically changes the trajectory of the relationship.

• Loss of respect undermines trust and collaboration.
• Loss of confidence in the plan can lead to pretending and disengagement.
• Emotional withdrawal (discussed in Episode 26, Dead Quiet: Is Stonewalling Killing Your Relationship?) creates distance that grows over time.

Principle 1: Switch off Autopilot and Re-Engage

• Let go of magical thinking—your relationship won’t fix itself.
• Reflect on this question: What will my relationship look like in 10 years if nothing changes?
• Take control of your future and create the relationship you want.

Principle 2: Create a Vision You Can Believe In

• If you're uncertain about your relationship's future, progress will be hard.
• Paint a picture of a realistic future you and your partner would want to stay in.
• This vision needs to reflect both your dreams and your partner's.

Principle 3: Co-Create a Shared Vision

• Once you have clarity, collaborate with your partner to merge your visions.
• Sit on the same side of the table, working as a team to tackle alignment.
• You don’t need to agree on everything—find common ground and create a future you both feel excited about.

• You can reconnect with your partner if you’ve lost your shared vision.
• Start by taking action on your own—get clear on your own vision before involving your partner.
• Build a shared vision that balances both partners' dreams and goals, so you can work toward a future you both want to stay in.

• Book a Relationship Reset Call at relationshipresetcall.com.
• Follow or subscribe to the podcast so you don’t miss future episodes.
• Leave a review to help others find the show.
• Share this episode with someone who might need it.

Ellen reminds listeners that divorce season can become recommitment season—an opportunity to realign and rebuild a stronger, more connected relationship. Relationships aren’t bulletproof, but by cultivating passion, presence, and purpose, you can weather life’s challenges together.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com

In this episode of Make More Love, Ellen Dorian explores the impact of betrayal on relationships and how it undermines trust, presence, and purpose—the key drivers of a passionate partnership. Ellen introduces the S*H*I*T Model, a practical framework designed to help listeners process betrayal, rebuild trust, and move forward, whether that means repairing the relationship or deciding to let it go.

Part 1: Betrayals vs. Disappointments

• The difference between disappointments and betrayals: Disappointments don’t usually erode trust, but a pattern of consistent letdowns can lead to betrayal.
• Betrayals involve forethought and perception, making them uniquely damaging to trust and connection.

Part 2: The S*H*I*T Model

• Phase 1: Crap or Get Off the Pot – Decide if you’re ready to rebuild trust or if it’s time to let go.
• Phase 2: Climb Off the Crap Pile – Let go of resentment and unrealistic expectations that keep you stuck.
• Phase 3: Compost That Crap – Turn lessons from betrayal into personal and relational growth through actionable steps.

Part 3: Practical Advice

• Learn how to let go of the “resentment story” and societal fairy tales about relationships.
• Focus on personal growth, rebuilding trust incrementally, and creating a shared relationship model.
• When necessary, seek guidance from a coach or counselor to work through unresolved issues.

Key Takeaways:

1. Not all letdowns are betrayals. Disappointments hurt but don’t usually erode trust, while betrayals strike at the foundation of the relationship.
2. The S*H*I*T Model helps you decide if you’re ready to rebuild trust. It walks you through a process to determine whether you’re prepared to do the work.
3. Decisiveness and letting go come first. Commit to staying or leaving, and release resentment before addressing the betrayal itself.

Ellen created a free downloadable worksheet to guide you through the S*H*I*T Model. Use it to figure out where you stand and the steps you can take to move forward. If you need personalized support, book a free Relationship Reset Call with Ellen at relationshipresetcall.com.

Next week, Ellen will wrap up the Avoiding Divorce series with a discussion on regaining alignment in your relationship and how to create a shared vision for the future.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

S*H*I*T Model Worksheet: https://drive.google.com/file/d/12u7PnW5OSu-ac28ckuoDCoryDW-Zl-vv/view?usp=sharing

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com

Summary:

Welcome to part two of our series on Divorce Season and how to avoid it. January is often called "divorce season," and we’re dedicating this month to helping you avoid becoming a statistic. In this episode, we tackle a crucial aspect of maintaining a thriving relationship: passion. We’ll explore the "Other Four Horsemen" that quietly erode intimacy and connection in relationships and, most importantly, how to overcome them. These hidden dynamics—Neediness, Childlike Behavior, Apathy, and Transactionalism—may be undermining your relationship more than you realize. Learn to identify these behaviors and take actionable steps to build a deeper, more meaningful connection with your partner.

Part 1: Understanding the Other Four Horsemen

• Overview of "The Other Four Horsemen": Neediness, Childlike Behavior, Apathy, and Transactionalism.
• Why these unconscious behaviors erode intimacy and create distance in relationships.

Part 2: Breaking Down Each Horseman

1. Neediness: Seeking constant validation and reassurance, which can exhaust your partner and kill attraction.

• Examples: Constant reassurance, clinginess, and overreacting to mistakes.
• Solution: Notice when you’re doing it, pause, and focus on meeting your own needs.

1. Childlike Behavior: Failing to live up to the expectations of adult partnership.

• Examples: Leaving messes, weaponized helplessness, and acting immaturely.
• Solution: Read the room, take responsibility for key tasks, and emulate adult role models.

1. Apathy: Neglecting to put effort into the relationship.

• Examples: Not being present, retiring romance, and losing empathy.
• Solution: Reconnect with gratitude, act with intention, and shift your perspective.

1. Transactionalism: Treating the relationship as a series of quid pro quo exchanges.

• Examples: Conditional love, keeping score, and using gifts as leverage.
• Solution: Shift your focus from what you’re getting to what you’re giving, and communicate intentions openly.

Part 3: Tools for Transformation

• Recognizing these patterns is the first step toward change.
• Small, intentional actions can have a big impact on reigniting passion and connection.
• Recommendations for additional insights:

Episode 7: Master Date Nights to Refuel Your Relationship.

Episode 23: Build A Bonfire: Steps to Reignite Your Relationship.

Episode 24: A Modern Hero’s Guide to Making More Love.

Episode 25: How to Make Your Partner Feel Loved and Get More Love in Return.

• The "Other Four Horsemen" are subtle but powerful barriers to intimacy.
• Identifying and addressing these behaviors can transform your relationship.
• Reigniting passion doesn’t require grand gestures—small, consistent actions matter most.

If you’re ready to dive deeper, book a free Relationship Reset Call at relationshipresetcall.com. Whether it’s a minor tune-up or a major overhaul, we’ll create a plan to help you move forward.

The foundation of a strong relationship is recognizing patterns that no longer serve you and committing to change. These small adjustments can pave the way for a more passionate and fulfilling connection with your partner.

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com

In this episode of The Make More Love Show, Ellen explores why January is often called "Divorce Season" and reframes it as the perfect time for a Relationship Wake-Up Call. She introduces the concept of the "Recommitment Season" and explores the reasons why this time of year is critical for relationships. Ellen discusses the warning signs of relationship trouble, the costs of divorce, and how gaining clarity can empower you to take control of your future.

Ellen outlines the four key reasons January is known for a spike in divorces: the holiday letdown, business stress, financial reviews, and resolutions for fresh starts. These factors combine to make January a turning point for many couples.

Using the analogy of wine, vodka, or fish, Ellen helps listeners evaluate their relationship's current state. Is it improving, stagnant, or deteriorating? She explains how each state ties to the risks of divorce and what action steps might be appropriate.

Ellen emphasizes the devastating impact divorce can have emotionally, socially, and financially, particularly for business owners. She explains how the financial toll often starts years before divorce papers are filed, with overspending, poor financial decisions, and the stress of a deteriorating relationship.

1. January is a pivotal month—use it to reflect on your relationship.
2. Assess whether your relationship is like wine, vodka, or fish to understand where you stand.
3. Gaining clarity about your options can help you make better decisions and take control of your future.

If you’re considering divorce or feeling stuck in your relationship, take advantage of Ellen’s free Relationship Reset Call. This 15–20 minute session gives you a chance to brainstorm options and gain a fresh perspective. Schedule your call at relationshipresetcall.com.

"January doesn’t have to be Divorce Season—it can be your Recommitment Season. Whether you’re ready to rebuild your relationship or simply gain clarity about your options, I’m here to help you take the next step."

Ellen invites listeners to share their thoughts, either in the P3 Insider's Community or directly with her via email. Or, for one on one brainstorming on a specific situation, listeners can set up a time on Ellen's Calendar for a free Relationship Reset Call.

All links can be found below.

The Make More Love show is for information and entertainment purposes only, and reflects the personal opinions and experiences of the host and guests. It is not a substitute for professional advice or guidance in specific situations.



www.makemorelove.show

www.passionatepartnersproject.com

https://www.facebook.com/groups/682764239165105

Email: [email protected]

Facebook:  https://www.facebook.com/ellen.dorian.7/

LinkedIn:    https://www.linkedin.com/in/ellendorian/

http://makemorelove.show/quiz

http://relationshipresetcall.com