Mama's Daily Dose

Choose one option and be consistent with it! Consistency over time is what yields results. Each of these take only a few minutes a day and have long lasting results without the side effects.

These examples all came from a study called "The Science of Gratitude" in 2018 by Dr. Summer Allen from the Greater Good Science Center at UC Berkley.

1. Count blessings - gratitude journal. 
2. Three good things that happened for you AND the cause of them. 
3. Mental subtraction - Imagine what life would be like if a positive event/experience did NOT happen. 
4. Gratitude letter to another person or visit a person and express gratitude. 
5. Death reflection - study showed undergratude university students that were asked to imagine their death experienced more gratitude than those asked to reflect on typical day. Yu can  do this through writing your own obituary (a practice that Donald Miller explains very well). 
5. Experiential consumption - spend money on experiences rather than on things - studies shows people felt and experienced more gratitude when they spend money on experiences (meal, concert tix, sporting event) rather than when purchasing material goods. 

Which one will you choose?

We will go more into detail on another gratitude practice next week that is shown to be the most scientifically effective practice that not only changes how you think and feel, but the changes your brain circuitry as well!

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

"I'm not doing laundry; I'm raising kids." - Jessica Smartt Memory Making Mom

What if you aren't simply washing the dishes, doing laundry, driving...and all those other mundane tasks that come along with being a mom?
No one told me all the other extra "stuff" that goes along with being a mom! The piles of laundry, the amount of dirt and grime in my house, brushing more teeth than my own, becoming an a Uber driver...an unpaid one at that!

What if these aren't mundane tasks that you loathe though? What if these tasks are actually raising your kids? What if doing the dishes is raising your children?

How you think about something creates your reality.

If you think doing the dishes sucks...then it sucks.
If you think doing the dishes helps raise your children...then that's what it does!

There is a story about a father that would bring his sons along with him to purchase cows for their farm. He would involve his kids in the whole process. When someone asked why he involved his young sons in raising the cows he answered, "I'm not raising cows; I'm raising boys."
 
Change how you think of the seemingly mundane tasks:
"I'm not doing dishes; I'm raising kids."
"I'm not an unpaid Uber driver; I'm raising kids." 

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

We're about to get a little sciency here...but not too much!

Gratitude is linked to the your Medial Prefrontal Cortex (PFC), the front part of your brain.

Your medial prefrontal cortex sets context, defines the meaning of a situations and is extremely linked to gratitude. The PFC allows us to take experienes and frame them as positive or take the same exact experience that we are forced to do or don't want to do as negative. 

Think of a hard training session - your PFC sets the context as to whether you are doing this for something more or a larger goal, or it just sucks to do it. Gratitude is a mindset that activates the PFC and in so doing so sets the context for your experience! 

So much so that you can get amazing health benefits and truly enjoy more activities.

It won't happen right away, but you can change the circuitry in your brain to frame experiences to be more enjoyable and to have an overall higher disposition to gratitude.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

Helping people out, acts of kindness and good deed are awesome; but there's more to it than that!

What affects whether a person feel gratitude or not? If the they feel more gratitude or less gratitude.

There are 2 factors that affect how you feel gratitude when others perform good deeds:
1. Perceived intention of the benefactor (the one doing the good deed)
2. The perceived value, or the cost to the benefactor

So if you are out there doing a "good deed" that is really to benefit you - people know that, including your kids! 

For a person to feel the most gratitude for a good deed they need to know the intention of the person was pure , they really are trying to help and not simply for selfish reasons. And there is a value to the good deed or cost to the benefactor; whether that be time, money or energy.

The next time you do a good deed - evaluate how the person receiving it will look at the intention and the value. 

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

 Is there something that your kid does that bothers the sh*t out of you?

Do they constantly complain, whine, yell, make a mess?

This may sting....but it's most likely on YOU!

I know you are doing your best and being a mom is no easy task and you already have so much do and now you not only have to teach your kids but you have to look at your actions and change too!?! Damn, that's a lot!

But here's the good news. You are in control of YOU and therefore you have the ability to change not only yourself, but your kids too! You have the power to create your "I AM!"

Now you may not be the only parent here. I get that. But here's the thing...there's a few studies that show that your disposition and example of gratitude weigh much heavier than that of the Dad.

More responsibility and onus put on the Mom!?!?

Especially when it comes to gratitude (this month's theme) it was show that the mom's disposition to gratitude greatly impacted the biological child's. The dad's actually had no bearing at all!

I'm not trying to put more on you, I'm letting you know the facts. But this is actually great news too, because since you have control you can change it!

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

Are you tired of hearing your kids complain that they want more? Fee like they aren't grateful for what they have?

Here are 4 simple steps to grow gratitude in your kids!

Andrea Hussong did a study with focus groups of parents to determine how parents think of their childrens' gratitude and how to cultivate gratitude in their kids. She then postulated that gratitude experience has 4 parts: 
1. notice what we can be grateful for. 
2. Think about WHY we have been given those things or experiences 
3. What do you feel about what you have been given (where do you feel it) 
4. Do something to express appreciation for these actions

Practice these 4 steps with your kids:
For example:
1. What are you grateful for? Food on the table. 
2. Why have we been given the food? People made/farmed the food and parents worked hard to have money to buy the food. 
3. What do you feel? I  feel so happy to eat and I feel connected to my family because I get to spend time with them over this meal. 
4. Do something to express appreciation - We can donate food to a local food bank.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

“Motherhood angst usually means I’ve lost my way somehow – forgotten or stopped doing some of the rituals that mean the most to our family. And so we bring them back.” - Jessica Smartt Memory Making Mom

When you are feeling like something is missing, that feel of anxiety or dread comes over you; we often look for the next NEW thing that will help us. What's the cool new product or program to help us feel happier, more, fulfilled?

But Jessica Smartt offers a new way of challenging motherhood angst. Instead of looking for the new, look at the old. What are some of the rituals or traditions that have worked in your family that have slipped out of your lives? Bring those back!

Today think of a memory, tradition or ritual that has worked for your family in the past. Bring it back to life!

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

Do you find it difficult to pump yourself up some days? Link you just aren't in a great mood and are unable to snap out of it?

Well, it isn't just you! Don't worry!

As humans we have a greater propensity for unhappiness than happiness! But why is that. It's evolutionary. Back in the day we had to be on the lookout so you didn't die.

Even though we are wired for be unhappy and look for the bad and the threats all around us, the good news is you can change the wiring in your brain. Circuits in your brain are plastic meaning they can change…no matter your age. You can in fact teach an old dog new tricks! 

Its been shown that gratitude practice performed regularly can shift the circuitry in your brain so you are happier on average...even outside of those time you are not practicing gratitude.

Replay that moment of gratitude that you did yesterday. Feel how you felt in your moment of gratitude. Now notice if that extends to other parts of your day.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

How powerful is gratitude when it is used in the correct way?

Gratitude has been shown time and again in studies to have beneficial affects on your physical, mental and spiritual health. It can not only help you feel better, but it can do so without the side effects that come along with many drugs!

*Disclosure - I am NOT telling you to stop taking an medication. This is simply to show that gratitude can be a powerful practice. Always consult your medical professional.

In studies it has been shown that a gratitude practice can have the same effects as some pharmaceuticals as well as exercise. AND the effects seem to be longer lasting than those of some pharmaceuticals and exercise. Meaning that a short gratitude practice can have long lasting effects.

Today think of a recent time when someone made you feel grateful. Replay the moment and FEEL the emotions your felt then.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett

The two MOST powerful words are "I AM..."

Anything that follows those two words need to be carefully planned out because that will become your reality.

"I AM" creates your beliefs on a conscious and subconscious level. What you tell yourself you will begin to believe and being to make choices and act into those beliefs.

Many people are not aware of how powerful saying "I am..." truly is. Whether you say the words out loud or to yourself.

Become aware of what you are demanding of yourself after those two words.

Are you a person that says things like:
I am... stupid, overweight, overwhelmed, incapable, stressed out…

If so, change those words! Try some of these on:
I am... resourceful (I don't know how know, but I will figure it out)
I am beautiful
I am powerful
I am awesome
I am a hard worker
I am an amazing mom
I am a patient mom
I am an attentive mom
I am grateful

Pick an "I am..." statement that speaks to you and repeat to yourself ever single day this week. See how your actions, choices and decisions start to adapt to who you tell yourself you are.

www.allyoumama.com
IG -@MeghanQBarrett