What if you could make people say “yes” more often—ethically? On today's episode of Speaking with Confidence, we dive deep into the science and art of ethical persuasion. Many of us have wondered, “How do I convince people without feeling pushy or manipulative?” Today, we’re answering that, exploring how understanding human decision-making can massively improve your influence—at work, at home, or on stage.

I had the pleasure of sitting down with Patrick Van Der Burght, a founding member of the Cialdini Institute, licensed trainer, and business partner of Dr. Robert Cialdini—the author of the legendary book Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion. If you’re in the communication or leadership space, you already know Cialdini’s name—so having Patrick Van Der Burght join us is a real treat. Not only does he co-host the podcast Ethical Persuasion Unlocked, but he’s been teaching ethical influence to professionals for over two decades, helping them accelerate toward their personal and professional goals using behavioral science.

Here’s what you’ll learn in this episode:

Why “no” usually just means “I don’t know yet”—not outright rejection

How most decisions are made unconsciously, and what that means for communication today

The difference between being liked and being similar, and how to use both

Why giving value first (reciprocity) increases compliance and loyalty

How to use testimonials and social proof for maximum impact

Ways authority can be established ethically on stage or in business, without losing credibility

The surprising power of scarcity and loss framing (“What will it cost you if you don’t act?”)

How getting someone to take a small, public action makes them much more likely to follow through

Why surveys and focus groups can so badly miss the mark on what truly influences behavior

How these principles work not just professionally but in everyday relationships—persuading your kids, family, and friends

This conversation is loaded with actionable insight, memorable stories, and some eye-opening science. Patrick is offering a free ebook and other resources—don’t miss those in the show notes. And if you found this episode valuable, please drop me a comment or review—Patrick and I would love to know your feedback.

Tune in to discover how you can start hearing “yes” more often—without ever sacrificing your ethics!

Connect with Patrick:

Website: https://ethicalpersuasion.com.au/
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ethicalpersuasion
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/patrick-van-der-burght/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ethicalpersuasion/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ethical_persuasion/
Twitter: https://x.com/yesmoreoften
TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@ethicalpersuasion
Book: https://yesmoreoften.com/

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