Have you ever felt like a total fraud, trying to perform as an expert instead of actually becoming one? In this episode, I dig into one of the biggest traps communicators face: the expert facade and the fear of failure that keeps us stuck. I'm Tim Newman, former college professor turned communication coach, and today on “Speaking with Confidence,” we're tackling the myth that failure is the enemy of success especially for Gen Z, where every misstep can feel like it's broadcast to the world on a permanent record.

We often think that to be taken seriously, we need to show up perfectly, but that mindset actually blocks progress. I share two personal stories the first from my college days where I was so nervous during my first speech that I literally threw up in class, and a second, more recent example where I blanked and spelled my own name wrong in front of a nurse. These moments were embarrassing, but they weren’t endpoints. They were powerful pivots that taught me vital lessons about authenticity and human connection.

In this episode, I walk you through my simple, three-part Pivot Protocol designed to transform every failure into a strategic advantage: no toxic positivity here, just practical, clear communication strategy. You’ll learn the difference between “tuition payments” (failures that teach you something) and “tragic errors” (ones you repeat without learning). We dive into why hiding mistakes actually creates communication breakdowns, blocking help and trust from your team or boss.

Here’s what you’ll take away from this episode:

The truth about why holding up a perfect expert image is a trap that shuts down learning

How to reframe failures as essential data instead of identity-defining flaws

Step-by-step instructions for using the Pivot Protocol:

The Autopsy: A cold, emotion-free look at what went wrong and what it revealed

The Extraction: Finding the strategic insight that only failure could give you

The Leap: Turning your new insight into a confident, public move forward

How I personally moved from being the most nervous speaker in class to a coach who builds real connection through vulnerability

Practical questions for breaking down your mistakes, so you stop letting embarrassment run the show

Why communicating your learned insights, instead of just the mistake, builds stronger trust and credibility

How to shift your team dynamic from defensive and blame-focused to curious and innovative

If you’re ready to stop protecting your image and start protecting the lesson, this episode is for you. Progress not perfection is the goal. Try applying the Pivot Protocol to a small failure this week and watch how your communication clarity and confidence grow. And don’t forget to grab your free ebook, The Top 21 Challenges for Public Speakers and How to Overcome Them, at SpeakingWithConfidencePodcast.com or register for the Formulas for Public Speaking course. Remember: your voice has the power to change the world. See you next time!

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Have you ever looked like the picture of confidence on the outside, while secretly battling feelings of self-doubt or imposter syndrome on the inside? If so, this episode of Speaking with Confidence is for you.

On this week’s episode, I explore what it really means to “feel confident,” not just look confident, and how we can bridge the gap between external appearance and our internal belief. I’m joined by the fantastic Joanna Zhang, international speaker, award-winning entrepreneur, and founder of The Operations Genius. Joanna has an incredible story of personal and professional transformation, having not only led her business to multiple international awards, but also overcome her own struggles with the imposter syndrome that so many high achievers face.

Joanna and I dive deep into the journey from external validation to authentic self-assurance. We get honest about what it’s like to achieve on paper but still be wracked with self-doubt, and how that pattern shows up for so many high achievers. Joanna shares her firsthand experiences with winning big awards but initially not feeling “enough” on the inside, her transition into genuine self-celebration, and how she began to recognize and embrace her own strengths instead of endlessly comparing herself to others.

We reflect on why it’s so hard for so many of us to accept compliments, celebrate wins, or acknowledge our growth and how to start shifting that mindset. Joanna introduces some practical strategies (including the genius idea of a “happy fund” to reward yourself!) for building and maintaining real, lasting self-confidence.

We also dive into:

The trap of comparing your weaknesses to others’ strengths

The pivotal shift from “doing” to “being” and why slowing down is essential for real growth

Recognizing the signals that your external confidence isn’t matched internally

How to celebrate small wins and why it matters so much for long-term fulfillment

Joanna’s journey from operating in a masculine leadership and communication style, especially in a male-dominated field, to finding balance and power in feminine energy and self-acceptance

Why skills are only part of being an effective communicator: how your inner state and intention drive impact, connection, and influence

Letting go of judgment and perfectionism to speak “from the flow,” and simple exercises to help you break free from fear and just get started (spoiler: you’ll surprise yourself!)

The biggest confidence wounds facing the younger generation, and the influence of social media and family on self-worth

Concrete actions you can start taking now to build up your authentic confidence, no matter where you’re starting from

Whether you’re a leader, entrepreneur, creative, or simply someone seeking a more confident presence, Joanna’s approach is all about acceptance, celebration, and letting go of old patterns that no longer serve you.

If you’ve ever wondered why outer confidence and inner confidence don’t always match and what practical steps you can take to finally align the two, this episode will give you encouragement, actionable ideas, and a supportive reminder that you absolutely have the power to change your relationship with yourself, your work, and your communication.

Connect with Joanna:

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Have you ever wondered why you can’t just “be more confident,” no matter how many pep talks you hear or inspirational quotes you read? In this episode of Speaking with Confidence, I tackle the frustrating reality that traditional confidence advice is often nothing more than a vibe check—temporary and fleeting, especially when the pressure is on. As a recovering college professor turned communication coach, I’ve seen firsthand how misunderstood confidence can be. Today, I take you through a forensic audit of your confidence, showing you how to treat it as a system—not a feeling.

We dive deep into the root causes that keep so many of us stuck in cycles of self-doubt, particularly for Gen Z, who face an identity crisis amplified by social media and external validation. I break down the three primary psychological triggers that hold you back: the imposter syndrome amplifier, the perfectionist trap, and the external validation void. These “gaslighters,” as I call them, create toxic narratives that sabotage your confidence and keep you chasing impossible standards.

But we go beyond identifying the problem. This episode is packed with actionable strategies to override those default settings. I walk you through a 48-hour trigger journal exercise to pinpoint your specific confidence dips, and introduce the Value Inventory—an evidence-based approach that forces your brain to face the reality of your skills and accomplishments. Drawing on concepts like Ryan Leak’s “chasing failure,” I show you how to use small, intentional failures as research tools to dismantle the perfectionism trap.

We build what I call your resilience firewall, connecting your audit findings to the three pillars that matter most: planning, research, and practice. By targeting your vulnerability points with specific plans, actively acquiring competence, and collecting low-stakes feedback, you create evidence-based assurance, moving from the feeling of being an imposter to speaking with unshakable authenticity.

Here’s what we covered in this episode:

Why “just be more confident” is useless advice and what actually works

The three psychological triggers that sabotage genuine confidence

How to do a confidence forensic audit using a 48-hour trigger journal

Building a Value Inventory to fight imposter syndrome with real evidence

Turning failure into research, not shame

Creating a resilience firewall through targeted planning, research, and practice

Why confidence isn’t a fixed trait, but a dynamic system you maintain

Actionable steps to start building evidence-based assurance today

Ready to upgrade your mental operating system and build real, lasting confidence? Start your 48-Hour Trigger Journal now and collect your first piece of evidence. For more tips and resources, check out speakingwithconfidencepodcast.com, grab your free ebook, and register for my Formulas for Public Speaking course. Remember, progress beats perfection every time—and your voice has the power to change the world.

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Have you ever wondered what it really means to speak with confidence, and how your words, presence, and mindset can transform every conversation? In this episode of Speaking with Confidence, I explore that question and much more with a truly remarkable guest.

I’m Tim Newman, your host—recovering college professor turned communication coach—and today I’m joined by Antoni Lacinai, an internationally acclaimed workplace communication expert, keynote speaker, and author. Not only has Antoni delivered masterclasses worldwide on compassionate leadership and empathy-driven engagement, but he’s also written and co-written 14 business books, hundreds of magazine columns, a novel, a radio theater play, and even released his first song on Spotify. Clearly, he’s not just a business mind; he's a creative soul with a unique perspective on what it means to be authentic in our work and communication.

We kick off the episode by diving into Antoni’s creative pursuits, including his Christmas song written for fellow speakers—because it’s important to show you’re more than just your job title. We talk about bringing humanity and authenticity back into business, how being creative makes us more relatable, and why it helps people see us beyond our professional roles.

From there, the conversation moves into pivotal moments in Antoni’s journey that led him to recognize communication as his superpower, such as being the only seven-year-old at a parent-teacher meeting brave enough to raise his hand—and discovering the impact that being listened to can have on a young mind. We discuss the importance of listening and encouragement for children, and how that applies to interactions throughout our lives. We also touch on research showing how positive recognition drives better team performance, and how small acts of kindness—like simply saying “good morning”—can profoundly elevate workplace culture.

Here’s what we covered:

Antoni’s creative journey and the value of authenticity

How pivotal childhood moments and being listened to shaped his confidence

The impact of positive recognition and kindness in the workplace

Practical ways to build confidence and get into the right mindset before communicating

The three communication superpowers: empathy, clarity, and energy

How to balance these superpowers for world-class communication

The importance of emotional intelligence and practicing new habits

The role of analog vs. digital communication and what AI means for human connection

Why SMART goals might not be enough, and the alternative model of HAPPY goals

Encouragement for listeners to use their voice to make a difference

By the end of this episode, you’ll know the secret ingredients to speaking with confidence—and why your words truly matter. Thanks for listening, and as always, remember: your voice has the power to change the world.

Connect with Antoni:

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Have you ever wondered why some networking conversations feel awkward and stale while others just flow with authenticity and connection? In today’s episode of Speaking with Confidence, I tackle exactly that question: why those standard "What do you do?" Icebreakers fail so spectacularly, especially with Gen Z, and how you can transform surface-level small talk into meaningful, memorable conversations.

I dive deep into the challenges of genuine communication in both personal and professional settings. As someone who's spent years studying and coaching communication, I've seen too many capable people get overlooked not because they're not ready, but because they haven't learned how to confidently show up and connect. This episode is all about stepping off the script and embracing authenticity in every conversation that counts.

In this episode, I walk you through my Connection Catalyst framework, designed to help you shift from fact-finding to insight discovery, and show you how strategic curiosity can make you stand out in any room, especially if you’re looking to connect with Gen Z or anyone craving genuine dialogue over tired transactional questions.

Here’s what we covered in this episode:

Why typical networking questions ("What do you do?", "Where are you from?") rarely create real connection

The psychology behind scriptive responses and why Gen Z sees right through transactional conversations

How boring questions signal a lack of curiosity, and why deep, value-driven questions build trust

The three principles of the Connection Catalyst: moving from information to insight, creating a value exchange, and building momentum for deeper conversations

Examples of transforming closed questions into open-ended ones that uncover beliefs, vulnerabilities, and real stories (like replacing "Do you like your job?" with "What's a belief you had about your industry that turned out to be completely wrong?")

The importance of the hidden value exchange in networking how strategic questions demonstrate genuine interest and build social capital

Practical tips for weaving strategic curiosity into your conversations without sounding robotic, including the use of conversational bridges and active listening

Why building rapport matters before diving into deeper questions, and how to keep the conversation comfortable and engaging

A challenge for listeners: replace one standard question in your next conversation with a strategic one and notice the change in dynamic

Reminders on progress over perfection, and resources for public speaking and communication improvement

If you want actionable ways to upgrade your networking skills and create conversations that matter, this episode will give you the tools and the confidence to do just that. Listen in, and let’s start having dialogues that actually build connection, not just check boxes.

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Have you ever wondered what separates an effective leader from a high-performing technician, and how personal branding can make or break your success? Today’s episode of Speaking with Confidence dives deep into these questions with practical wisdom, actionable steps, and a fresh perspective on leadership in the modern world.

I’m Tim Newman, your host—recovering college professor, communication coach, and curious asker of big questions. This week, I had the pleasure of speaking with Walter Dusseldorp, better known as the Dutch Mentor. Walter’s journey is a fascinating one: from aspiring physician and paramedic, to executive leader, pilot, mentor, and now founder of the Pure Leadership Power program and the Smart Performance app. His story is packed with lessons on adaptability, growth, and communication that anyone can apply.

We started with Walter’s unique background, touching on his formative experiences in Holland, responding to 9/11 as a paramedic, and catching the flying bug that led him to pursue piloting as both passion and profession. Walter shared insights about transitions, living with purpose, and the moment that changed his outlook: realizing that dreams need to be lived today, not put off for tomorrow.

From there, we explored Walter’s evolution from technical roles into mentoring and coaching—how he recognized a need for better leadership, saw the gap between technical expertise and people skills, and decided to help others make that pivotal transition. He shared how a growth mindset and continuous learning are essential for becoming an effective communicator and leader, emphasizing the importance of vulnerability, seeking mentorship, and taking ownership of your own development.

If you’re looking for concrete steps to amplify your leadership, hone your communication skills, and clarify your “why,” this conversation is for you. Here’s what we covered in this episode:

Walter’s journey from paramedic and pilot to leadership mentor

The power of transitions and living with purpose

Moving from technical expertise to effective leadership

Why communication is the number one reason teams fail—and how to fix it

The importance of continuous learning, growth mindset, and daily habits

Building and protecting your personal brand (and what mistakes to avoid)

The difference between mentoring and coaching

Outward-facing leadership and the need for confident humility

Why vulnerability and seeking mentorship accelerate your growth

Creating a “why” statement that differentiates you in interviews and organizations

The perils of groupthink, how it devastated the Challenger mission and companies like Blockbuster

The importance of dialogue, civil discourse, and learning to speak the language of younger generations

Practical frameworks for leadership, including Lean Six Sigma and the Pure Leadership Power program

Walter’s Smart Performance app: what it offers and how to get involved

Walter brings a rare mix of technical expertise, personal experience, and pragmatic Dutch wisdom, making this episode one of our most insight-packed to date. If you’re ready to take your leadership to the next level and create a brand that truly reflects who you are, tune in!

You can connect with Walter on LinkedIn, Instagram, YouTube, or email him directly at [email protected]. The Smart Performance app launches January 1st—reach out if you’re interested in joining as a founding member.

Thanks for listening to Speaking with Confidence. Remember: your voice has the power to change the world.

Connect with Walter:

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Are you an introvert who’s ever felt pressured to be “more outgoing” at work? Maybe you’ve been told to “speak up more” or “just be charismatic”—but trying on someone else’s style feels fake and leaves you burnt out. What if your natural quietness isn’t the obstacle everyone says it is, but actually your biggest professional edge? That’s the question we’re diving into in this episode of Speaking with Confidence.

I’m Tim Newman, your host—a recovering college professor turned communication coach, and today’s episode is all about turning the corporate world’s obsession with extroversion on its head. We’ll explore the evidence that introverts not only belong in high-visibility roles, but often outperform their extroverted colleagues, especially when it comes to leadership and influence.

In this episode, I get real about the exhaustion introverts feel under non-stop pressure to network and perform. I break down research from top journals that shows the loudest voice isn’t necessarily the most influential. Instead, introverted professionals possess some major superpowers: deep listening, keen observation, and a thoughtful approach that builds psychological safety and trust on teams.

Here’s what we cover in this jam-packed episode:

The myth of extroversion as the only model for leadership (and what the latest research says instead)

How introverts’ natural strength as listeners can build powerful trust and influence within teams

A practical explanation of the 80/20 listening rule for meetings, so you can contribute with confidence and precision

Turning your natural tendency to pause before speaking into a deliberate mark of thoughtfulness (not hesitation)

The “pause and pivot” technique: responding to tough questions without panic or filler, and commanding the room when you do speak

A real-life coaching case study to show these strategies in action

The Precision Protocol: a simple, three-step framework for making every contribution count by preparing smarter, bridging smoothly into discussion, and dropping concise, value-packed insights

How using these strengths consistently can build a reputation as the person everyone wants to hear from—no fake charisma required

The unique power of this approach for Gen Z professionals, remote workers, and anyone seeking greater authenticity in the workplace

A quick-start action step so you can begin leveraging your introvert edge for your next big meeting

I wrap up with a reminder: Progress beats perfection, and your voice—used thoughtfully—can transform your entire team, project, or organization.

If you want to go deeper, be sure to check out my conversation with Stacy Chasen from January for even more strategies for quiet communicators. And don’t forget to visit speakingwithconfidencepodcast.com for your free resources and to sign up for my new course.

Remember, your quiet nature is a strength you just haven’t been shown how to use—until now. Thanks for tuning in, and I’ll talk to you next time!

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Have you ever wondered how the world’s top interrogators communicate with calm, confidence, and true connection—even in high-stakes, emotionally charged scenarios? In today’s episode of Speaking with Confidence, I dive into this question and so much more with Brad Beeler, a retired United States Secret Service special agent and course manager for interview and interrogation techniques at the National Center for Credibility Assessment. Brad’s career is nothing short of extraordinary: he served 25 years in the Secret Service, spent 17 years as a polygraph examiner, and has conducted more criminal polygraph examinations than anyone else in Secret Service history.

Brad's experience spans thousands of interviews with some of the most difficult individuals—often in cases involving the sexual exploitation of children. What struck me in our conversation is how central communication is, not just for uncovering the truth, but for creating safety, trust, and effectiveness in the most challenging environments. Brad shares why calm leads to calm, and how emotional contagion, body language, and tone shape every interaction—whether you’re in a high-stakes interview or talking with your family.

Here’s what we cover in this episode:

Brad Beeler’s career journey and transition to teaching

The power of calm and emotional contagion in communication

The science of body language, tone, and presence

Listening as a full-contact sport and why neutrality matters

Practical strategies for building connections and safe spaces

How to research and prepare for impactful conversations

Safety and privacy in the digital age, especially for children

Insights from Brad’s book, "Tell Me Everything"

Understanding horns and halos and confirmation bias

The difference between ethical influence and manipulation

Treating everyone with respect and the importance of truth-finding

You’ll walk away from this episode inspired to rethink how you show up in every conversation—with strategies and mindsets used by one of the world’s top communicators. If you want to connect with Brad, visit BradleyBeeler.com or find him on LinkedIn or Instagram at BradBeeler1865. Thank you for joining us, and remember: your voice has the power to change the world.

Connect with Brad:

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Have you ever felt guilty saying no, even when your brain screams that you don’t have the time or energy to help? In this episode of Speaking with Confidence, I tackle one of the most challenging—and universal—skills for communication and leadership: how to set boundaries and say no effectively, without damaging relationships or your credibility.

As I celebrate the podcast’s two-year anniversary, I’m excited to announce a special giveaway for listeners—a free 3-hour one-on-one coaching package for anyone who leaves a review and tags me on social media. But before we dive into the details of the contest, let’s get real about the Gen Z struggle, which honestly affects almost all of us: we want to be helpful, but we desperately need to protect our time and energy. This episode is all about striking that balance, and learning to say a strategic no that actually builds trust and influence.

Today, I’m guiding you through real-world strategies grounded in science and research for better boundary-setting. I start by unpacking why it feels so hard to say no: our brains literally perceive it as a social threat, triggering fight-or-flight mode thanks to the amygdala. Most people fall into two traps when refusing a request—either ghosting (avoiding the person altogether) or becoming a jerk (being overly blunt or aggressive). Both hurt your professional reputation and relationships. Then there’s the spotlight effect, which tricks us into believing everyone will notice and judge our refusal way more harshly than reality suggests.

Here’s what we covered in this episode:

Why saying no feels dangerous, and the neuroscience behind our aversion to refusal

Common failure modes to avoid: ghosting and aggressive rejection

The Value Anchor Method explained and demonstrated with real-world scripts

How to say no to your boss, teammate, or friend without burning bridges

Tips for maintaining professionalism and protecting your reputation

The mindset shift from seeing boundaries as walls to viewing them as foundations for strong partnerships

A practical implementation challenge for listeners to practice the three-part refusal framework

Resources for deeper learning, including my video with the NOPE Coach Suzanne Kolberg and my Formula for Public Speaking course

Details about the two-year anniversary contest and how to enter

If you’re ready to upgrade your communication skills and build lasting influence—plus maybe win some free coaching—this episode gives you everything you need to start saying no with confidence, clarity, and kindness. Let’s turn boundaries into bridges for stronger, healthier connections in both your work and personal life.

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How do you find your true voice and lead with confidence when you’re the only one in the room who’s different? That’s the question at the heart of today’s episode of Speaking with Confidence.

Today, I had the pleasure of sitting down with empowerment executive coach Varuschka Nagesar, whose rich and diverse background weaves together corporate law, global commercial leadership, and transformative coaching for high-achieving women. If you’ve ever struggled to speak up, felt like the outsider, or navigated culture clashes at work, this conversation is for you.

We started by diving into Varuschka’s extraordinary journey, from her roots and legal training in post-apartheid South Africa—a world shaped by diversity, multiple languages, and complex cultural nuances—to major commercial leadership roles in the UK, US, the Middle East, and Europe. She shared powerful stories about learning to honor different communication styles, from deciphering idioms in new countries to gaining respect for those doing business in a second or third language. Her insight: real connection starts with meeting people where they are, not just linguistically but culturally and emotionally.

Here’s what we covered in today’s episode:

How global and generational diversity shapes communication and trust at work

Why language and nonverbal cues matter—and how to navigate misunderstandings across cultures

Dealing with being “the only one” in the room and turning that into your strength

The difference between confidence and self-belief—and how to build both

How self-limiting beliefs show up, and simple, real-world strategies to overcome them

The role of core values and intuition in major life and career decisions

Real-life stories and mindset shifts that helped Varuschka stop “swimming upstream” and find alignment

Advice for listeners on taking the first steps toward authenticity, fulfillment, and empowered leadership

If you’re ready to step into your full influence, communicate more powerfully, or simply need inspiration to trust yourself, this episode is a must-listen. Thank you to Varuschka Nagesar for sharing her journey, wisdom, and practical takeaways. And as always, remember: your voice has the power to change the world.

Connect with Varuschka:

Website: varuschkanagesar.com  

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/varuschka-nagesar/ 

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