Missing Real with Mike D'Arrigo

Missing Real Episode 2 is about Star Wars Episode 4,  confusing already!  This is the movie that started it all!  It's got its weaknesses, shall we exploit them?  But we still love it!  

Here's one the Academy Awards let slip through the cracks: Fortress!  Starring the Highlander himself, Christopher Lambert!  You must've at least heard of it, right?  It's a guilty pleasure, and watching it is much like serving a 90-minute sentence in the underground futuristic prison where our mindless mayhem takes place!  It's got guns, lasers, cyborgs and violent brawls, so it's a mystery why Arnold Schwarzenegger dropped out of the project, he'd have been right at home.  Guess he needed to shoot Last Action Hero instead, oh well...
Anyway, Fortress is still a blast!  You can hear me try to prove it to my co-star and frequent guest Dave Chan, who first watched it a day before we recorded this podcast.  Part of his community service, y'know?  

Many actors have portrayed the iconic British secret service agent James Bond over the years, but none have done it quite as "Britishly" as Sir Roger Moore.  Nobody does it better, if Carly Simon is to be believed.  But in this movie, somebody did it worse: Roger Moore!  It was just bad timing really, because he was getting pretty old at this point and was a little past his time to be playing Bond.  The only "Bond" he needed to be concerned with was the one holding in his dentures!  It's still a fun mid-80s action flick with two stunning blondes: Tanya Roberts and...Christopher Walken!  Yeah, that's right.  Walken is blonde.  This is way before Bond was blonde.  And while we're on the subject of hair,  Duran Duran does the theme song!  While remaining perfectly coiffed and stylish, however that word applies to what people wore in the 80s.  
So come on!  Dance into the fire and let's have a romp through this hilarious podcast honoring the last appearance of this particular 007, and you'll be begging for Moore!

It's my favorite film of all time...so far!  Not a big hit in '82.  We wanted Han Solo and we got Rick Deckard instead.  More like Dick Wreckard!  What a loser!  But this movie has endured and earned its place among the most revered sci-fi masterpieces.  Ridley Scott followed his classic Alien with this future noir detective story with androids, flying cars and endless torrents of rain!  Los Angeles, 2019...well, that was the future in 1982.  Thankfully, the weather's a little bit better than that in our present day L.A.  There are some fascinating inside stories and lots of laughs to be had in this podcast.  So, give it a listen!  I promise, it's not a Voight-Kampff test.  

In 2015, after we'd all had about a decade to forget about those Star Wars prequels, we were given a New Hope (yeah, sue me, Lucas): our classic heroes would return in a follow-up to Return of the Jedi!  But mixed in with some new characters we hope we won't hate.  The director would be JJ Abrams, so hopefully all is not Lost!  (Alright, I'll stop.)  Sadly, it seems the big baddie is Darth Vader's angsty teenage grandson/fan who can't find an intimidating mask or get the voice right.  There's another Death Star with a fancy name but unlike an iPhone, it doesn't really improve with each new update.  On the plus side, we get Han!  Chewie!  Leia!  (she's a General now, no more politics or princess nonsense) and if we're lucky, a dash of Luke Skywalker at the very end.  A very fun movie that nearly lives up to the hype and expectations, The Force Awakens is our subject this time around, and my co-pilot is Ed Marcus (slightly less hairy than a wookiee, but just as dependable.  Welcome back, Ed!). 

In my first-ever podcast, I share my personal insights and insults on one of the most visionary and ripped-off movies ever envisioned or ripped off.  ALIEN!  In space, no one can hear you scream...or laugh!

The poster for this 1993 futuristic action extravaganza may look like an ad for a boxing match, but this is so much more than Rocky meets the Jetsons!  Renegade cop Sly Stallone gets cryogenically frozen into spumoni and thawed out in 2032 where he's the only law enforcement officer who actually knows how to enforce.  Wesley Snipes is running amok, and the peaceful, violence and profanity-free society is about to get brutally profane.  Things will explode!  Stallone will run from those exploding things in slow motion!  Fists, feet and bullets will fly!  Add to the mix a sweet Sandra Bullock before she learned how to speed, and a smart-ass Denis Leary barely holding his temper, and we have us a winner!  I'm not sure everyone out there can even remember this movie, but my pal Quan Ngo knows!  Join us for a rip-roaring, slam-bang conversation.  Wow...did that sentence fizzle out.

The Big Apple was pretty rotten in this classic 1981 John Carpenter/Kurt Russell landmark.   It's set in the future (which by now is actually the distant past of 1997, but let's not ruin everything already!) and our anti-hero Snake Plissken is tasked with rescuing the President from an urban warzone with the clock ticking and the fate of the world in the balance!  There's a very important cassette tape (again, futuristic!) and a cast of strange characters and character actors he encounters along the way.  Kurt at his coolest, and even with just one good eye he still manages to patch things up!  After 40 years, this movie is still a favorite of mine.  Dave Chan likes it, too!  He's to blame for me picking this particular flick, so he's been recruited to blab about it with me on this exciting and hilarious episode.  You wanna meet the Duke?  Listen now!

You've heard of a "bad penny"?  Well there's no badder penny than Pennywise, the malevolent and not very amusing clown spawned from the imagination of Stephen King.  His 1986 novel, IT, was an instant classic and one of his crowning achievements.  (King pun!  Ha ha!  No?)  Both a 1990 TV miniseries and a pair of big-budget theatrical releases in 2017/2019 brought this epic story to the screen.  Now, I'm bringing it to the earphones and all your favorite audio outputs!  Follow me down the drain to a funhouse of horrors and jokes.  You'll be amazed at how I manage to squeeze 8 hours of movie into just over 1 hour of babble.  Come on and float!