Welcome to episode three of Big Time Adulting. This episode features my first official guest on the podcast, who is uniquely qualified to provide insights on mom guilt and parenting during a pandemic. Dr. Tanya Cotler is a clinical psychologist who specializes in reproductive and maternal mental health and parent-child attachment. Being both a child and adult psychologist, she is the perfect candidate to answer my questions today.  It has been both validating and reaffirming to hear from Dr. Cotler that parenting doesn’t have to be perfect. There is no reason to feel guilty for not breastfeeding, deciding to go with an unpopular parenting style, or even having an emotional outburst in front of your child. If you’ve ever struggled with mom guilt, felt the intense pressure to become a perfect mom, or have wondered on how to support your child during this pandemic, this episode is for you. Learn more from Dr. Tanya Cotler through her website, or connect with her on Instagram (@drcotlrer) Connect with Caitlin Connect with me on Instagram @bigtimeadulting

Mom guilt and parenting during the pandemic with Dr. Tanya Cotler

I’m Caitlin Murray, host of Big Time Adulting. This show was made for moms like me who crave funny, provocative, no-nonsense entertainment to distract themselves from the hamster wheel that is life. Join me for conversations about parenting, relationships, lifestyle, and what it means to be human. Consider this your mid-week women’s group. Circle up because shit’s about to get real.

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Caitlin Murray wants to know why we are frothing at the mouth to enroll our kids in every single extracurricular activity? When did over-scheduling our kids become the norm? Parents of the 80s and 90s were also busy shuttling kids from thing to thing but the activities they were engaged in were close to home, not very serious, and didn't interfere with downtime and play. With a cameo from economist Emily Oster, Caitlin explores the benefits of extracurriculars but also how overcommitment can lead to burnout and strain on the family. Caitlin shares her personal experience of getting sucked into over-scheduling and how she approaches it now with more sanity and balance.   Follow Caitlin Murray @bigtimeadulting Subscribe to Caitlin's newsletter Soul Snacks (where she shares her playlists and more)  Some of Caitlin's favorite brands & affiliate partners:   Knockaround Sunglasses (use code BIGTIMEADULTING for 15% OFF)  The best store in the world  The second best store    

Permission To Stop Over-Scheduling Your Kids

Emily Tisch Sussman, former political strategist, mother of 3, and host of the podcast She Pivots, joins Caitlin to discuss how motherhood forced her to leave her high-powered career and carve out a new path. Emily reflects on her initial fear and doubt about motherhood, the pressure of family expectations, and the realization that her pre-kid version of success was quickly becoming unsustainable. Emily talks about the profound loss she felt in her article, My Children Killed My Career But Took Me in an Unexpected New Direction, and the visceral reaction she received from colleagues and woman from around the world.  Check out Emily's dynamite podcast, She Pivots, where she interviews prominent leaders and women about how they successfully redirected their personal and professional lives, turning challenges into growth and opportunity.  Follow Emily Tisch Sussman @shepivotsthepodcast Follow Caitlin Murray @bigtimeadulting Subscribe to Caitlin's newsletter Soul Snacks (where she shares her dance playlists and more)  Today's episode is sponsored by Primal Kitchen. Use Code BIGTIMEADULTING to receive 20% off your entire order at www.primalkitchen.com Some of Caitlin's favorite brands & affiliate partners:   Knockaround Sunglasses (use code BIGTIMEADULTING for 15% OFF)  The best store in the world  The second best store  

Having Kids Challenged My Meaning of Success with Emily Tisch Sussman

In this refreshing monologue, inspired by one of her most viral reels, Caitlin Murray shares her dirty little secret about what she really craves as a mom of three: alone time. Not just any alone time. It's alone time given to her by her husband. It doesn’t require childcare or coordination or the pressure to be productive. Her mind can be at ease knowing her children are cared for by a parent. And she doesn’t want him to have it easy. She wants him to immerse fully into the chaos and experience the full weight of juggling the shit show that's solo parenting.  Caitlin goes on to examine how society tells women that motherhood should feel natural and easy and therefore mothers have it easier than fathers who work outside of the home. Caitlin believes by giving fathers the opportunity to solo parent in the early childhood years is one step closer to respecting the role of mothers in society.   Follow Caitlin Murray @bigtimeadulting Subscribe to Caitlin's newsletter Soul Snacks (where she shares her playlists and more)  Some of Caitlin's favorite brands & affiliate partners:   Knockaround Sunglasses (use code BIGTIMEADULTING for 15% OFF)  The best store in the world  The second best store    

My Dirty Little Secret About Alone Time

How often do you inquire about your child's feelings and emotions during the day? In this episode, Caitlin delves deeper into one of her most recent viral reels: why we worry so much about our children's feelings and why we're always preoccupied with the idea that what we say or do might negatively impact them. This attentiveness is well intentioned. We want to shape our kids into confident, well-adjusted, and resilient adults. But it's frankly exhausting sometimes. Caitlin suggests that maybe we're overthinking things and reminds listeners that our kids could benefit from figuring out and sitting with their own emotions from time to time. She reminds us that we're already doing a fantastic job and perhaps we could let go of our need to do more and instead recognize the efforts we're already making as parents.   Watch  the reel that inspired this episode Follow Caitlin Murray @bigtimeadulting Caitlin's magazine Soul Snacks  Some of Caitlin's favorite brands & affiliate partners:   Knockaround Sunglasses (use code BIGTIMEADULTING for 15% OFF)  The best store in the world  The second best store    

Why Are We So Obsessed With Our Kid's Feelings?

Our guest today is the iconic Cris Cavallari, owner of ICCON, a Philadelphia-based fashion studio and online boutique. Cris shares her story navigating motherhood for the second time, 16 years after giving birth to her first child when she was only 16-years-old. Cris expected the second time around to be much smoother because she was an adult and had a partner. But soon into her pregnancy she realized she was going to be alone in her journey. In this conversation, Cris discusses her co-parenting challenges, finding strength in hard times, and how cutting her son's long hair surprisiningly helped her let go of control, anger, and self-pity. Cris is a beacon of inspiration and we’re so excited for you to get to know her.   Follow Cris @cris_cavallari and get your shop on at her online boutique ICCON Follow Caitlin Murray @bigtimeadulting Caitlin's magazine Soul Snacks  Today's episode is sponsored by Lesser Evil Snacks! Follow them here: @lesserevilsnacks Some of Caitlin's favorite brands & affiliate partners:   Knockaround Sunglasses (use code BIGTIMEADULTING for 15% OFF)  The best store in the world  The second best store   Submit your "big time adulting" story to us and potentially be a guest on the podcast! Write to us at bigtimeadultingpodcast@gmail.com. 

Mom guilt and parenting during the pandemic with Dr. Tanya Cotler

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