Moms and Martinis

Taneisha Brianna, widely known as Queen Poison, shares the process of writing her latest two books, Naked and Layers. She shares how love has evolved from her 20’s to her 30’s. She bold and unapologetic in this transparent conversation about sex, love, heartbreak, relationships, and admiration for black men. The two share how embrace femininity has helped them become more comfortable in evolving into womanhood. Queen shares the intimate moment of her losing her virginity and how the guy responded to her. Queens reads some of the invigorating poems and tells the stories behind the poems. Kira shares why it took so long to recover from her last heartbreak. The two share the hardest parts about a breakup. Taneisha explains that determent of remaining in relationships that do not serve us. Ultimately leading us with a necessary healing process. She also shares the moment she received an unexpected apology from the ex who inspired her latest book, Layers. Kira also shares how she has been an emotional safety net for the men in her life and how it has impacted her emotional health. The two share why they block all communication from those men post relationship. Kira shares how detachment has caused her ex-lovers to feel she’s coldhearted, distant, and emotionless. Kira shares her superpower of making a black man blush by creating pockets of intimacy. The two share the challenges of getting to know someone intimately. Lastly, they share what makes a man attractive to them. This is a conversation that you do not want to miss.

Guest: Taneisha Brianna, Queen Poison, Author

Song: Sex You… by Backyard Band

Purchase Layers by Taneisha Brianna: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08QRZ7TL7/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glc_fabc_-z63FbRHWB4P3

Purchase Naked:Poems by Taneisha Brianna: https://www.amazon.com/Naked-Poems-Taneisha-Brianna/dp/1724964941

In this episode, Tiana Renee and Kira discuss how trauma impacts our approach to dating, love and relationships. They discuss how our frame of reference is packed away in our invisible suitcase and take that into all of our relationship (friends, family, and intimate partner). Additionally how the individuals in our lives challenge the work and healing that we have completed on ourselves. Tiana talks about how anxiety and certain sensations that resembles our trauma can lead to us targeting our partner which may not always be the case. She also breaks down how our brain is trained to respond to trauma. Kira shares why she believes your expectations show up in your behavior and how it reflects in our core beliefs. They both share how they detach from people and situations and how they prepare themselves for the worst case situation. They shared how healing looks in different people; especially when dating. Every person in your life will reveal something about you. The people who challenge you if they care, building a foundation that is built to last. Every time someone pulls something out of you, they are revealing another part of you. Tiana credits her therapist for references the Zillow commercial of Sue, who had to face all parts of herself when making a buying decision. The negative, spontaneous, paranoid, anti-social, lazy, stressed, helpful, and gullible sides of yourself. Therefore, you have to consider the people at your table and which side of yourself who is doing the work. Kira shares how she invests in her children mental health that will require additional professional resources. The two review a Psychology Today article about childhood trauma and Tiana shares tips for parents of children who have or are experiencing trauma. Kira shares how not address her childhood trauma cause her to consider conversations as confrontation. Kira asks the question that many may be asking, “Will everyone have trauma?” Tiana shares how a person’s environment and cultural norms contributes to how a person respond to experiences.

Guest: Tiana Renee, Cope for the Culture

Song Credit: Be Happy, Mary J. Blige

Book Reference:

The Power of Your Subconscious Mind by Joseph Murphy

Zillow Commercial (Sue):

https://youtu.be/amb7j9CY3bY

Psychology Today article:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-race-good-health/201309/early-childhood-trauma-how-parents-can-help

In this episode, Kira talks with Jarratt about their dating experiences. Kira shared how sliding into Jarratt's DM turned into them exploring if they were compatible. Kira shared how she quickly moves between relationships and has learned to slow down to assess if her potential mate is the right fit. Jarratt shared that he made sure his ex was in a good head and heart space before moving on. Jarratt shared the silver lining of dating during the pandemic and how it removed some of the pressures of dating in person. Finally, the two answered the tricky question of who should decide to end a dating situation when it's clear one is unable or unwilling to provide what the other needs. Kira questions her willingness to fight for a relationship and stick through tough times. 

Jarratt and Kira discuss their experience dating each other. Jarratt shared how it was refreshing to lay the cards on the table; yet, the straightforwardness and Kira's assertive approach can turn off the other person if they are not ready or moving at a similar pace. Kira admits that she quickly detaches from people and situations and moves on quickly, can perceive as cold and distant. Jarratt shares how his 'cheat codes' and Kira's 'blueprint' accompanied with their need to fix others, ultimately sabotages their desires for meaningful mutual relationships. Jarratt encourages Kira to exercise patience and provides wise and insightful feedback as she continues accepting applications for #OperationStepdad. 

Guest: Jarratt, It's About Damn Time Podcast

Song Credit: Love 'Em All by K. Michelle

This episode is sponsored by Raw Truth: Stories of Female Infidelity

For more information: https://linktr.ee/Rebecca.rawtruth

Website: www.rawtruthstoriesoffemaleinfidelity.com

Email [email protected]

In this episode, Kira's dad, Dr. H, joins in the conversation to talk about what makes a good stepdad. He has 13 children (that he knows about), which includes five biological children and eight bonus children. Dr. H shares why he has always insisted on not labeling his blended family as "half or step". He tells the story of his great aunt who told him never to speak to her again if he did not take care of his children. Kira gets emotional as she describes the love and care her stepmother has for her. She shares why she feels that she set an ideal example of who co-parenting in a blended family should look like. Kira's parents have been together for 35 years, and her father provide insights on how he has been able to sustain his long term relationship. 

Dr. H shares the two heart surgeries he had in Aug 1994 and May 2002. Kira ties his procedures into her quest for love outlining how hereditary issues and her personal self love journey have shaped her views on love. They discuss that similar to some heart surgeries a person may have to take from other parts of themselves to make themselves whole and receptive to love. During that time, one may have to rely on their support system, change who and where they receive information, and change the way they live to receive love. They also discuss that having a second surgery is likely; however, it could be life threatening. Which in terms of love, one may never recovery from a broken heart and commit themselves to a life of singleness and become unwilling to love again. 

Kira's dad describes her as a child. He says he knew she was different when she turned 2 weeks old and how she carved a special place in her heart. They share four phone calls that caused a pivot in their relationship. The first of him telling her that he was not returning back to Atlanta to live with her, her brother, and mom as a father. The second, when Kira called to share that her mom was sick and needed help closes out family affairs. The third when Kira left a voice message using her second language of profanity telling her dad how she felt. Then the fourth call back from Kira to apologize, forgive her father, and begin to heal their relationship. 

Kira is shocked to learn that her father thinks she should wait to get into a relationship. However, he does describe what he thinks would be the ideal partner for his daughter and why traditional gender roles would never work for Kira. Dr. H shares why he believes women are more durable than men and why they should not sacrifice their own dreams for those of her partner. 

Guest: Dr. Rev. Frederick Hancock I

Song Credit: Daddy by Beyonce

This episode is sponsored by Raw Truth: Stories of Female Infidelity

For more information: https://linktr.ee/Rebecca.rawtruth

Website: www.rawtruthstoriesoffemaleinfidelity.com

Email [email protected]

In the season four premiere, Kira is joined at the kitchen table with BJ to discuss her readiness for love, dissecting where her blockage lies, the risks of dating, properly preparing for a healthy relationship, and the long-term work needed sustain the relationship. The two explore the interesting dynamics of the heart and mind versus wants and desires. Using the analogy of heart surgery, BJ begins with a pre-op assessment to determine if Kira's perceived need and self-identified symptoms are truly the issues and if surgery is warranted. Next, BJ explains how social spaces often serve as a Heart Health WebMD, causing many to misdiagnose themselves, derailing preparing healing and growth in spaces. Therefore, one may develop identify red flags, which are actually a sign that one may need to develop a more sensibility to emotions perceived as a threat when it is an invitation for healthier communication. 

BJ explains how years of malpractice through self-medicating could pose an obstacle when assessing if your new potential primary care provider (partner) new methods and prescriptions towards healing are accurate or worth exploring. The two discuss tips for successful dating and the importance of deep conversations when courting. BJ also elaborates on his side of the analogy covered on his show, Who Gets Love, if it is fair to disqualify a potential partner because of their weaknesses. He also asks if we are giving the other person credit for their efforts. The two covered this and so much more. Tune in and find out if you are emotionally healthy enough to enter into a relationship?

Guest: BJ, Creative Director/CEO, Host, Who Gets Love Podcast

Song Credit: Girl Like Me by Jazmine Sullivan featuring H.E.R.

This episode is sponsored by Raw Truth: Stories of Female Infidelity

For more information: https://linktr.ee/Rebecca.rawtruth

Website: www.rawtruthstoriesoffemaleinfidelity.com

Email [email protected]