Kegs of Lube, Penis Straws, and Espresso Shots, oh my! 

This book claims “hilarious and erotic surprises”...we claim…BANKRUPTCY! Call the police 'cause someone broke the TV and the unicorn is upset. What could possibly go better with a pump of lube than a wet blanket. Fasten your double-sided dildos 'cause this book is gonna fuck you up. Oh yeah…the book is called Night Shift: A Choose-Your-Own Erotic Fantasy. By Joanna Angel.

**Our generous Distinguished Patrons have deemed you all worthy and selected this EXCLUSIVE EPISODE to release for your pleasure. Enjoy!**

Space, Planets, and Jail, oh my!

THE PRISONER IS ESCAPING….into my…vagina. Welcome to another exclusive episode, distinguished patrons. This week DP Jamie lost again which means we will be reading, In Fugitive Arms by Christine Michels. Was DP Jamie right or will we all have out of this world orgasms? Listen to find out. 

Your two favourite smutty ladies are taking a break for the next two months due to exciting things in our personal lives! Be sure to check back in in September when we will continue Season 2!

If you miss us, check out our Patreon here, or follow us on TikTok (@notyourmothersbookclub). Love ya!

Beavers, Mounties, and Denim, oh my!

Hope you’re all wearing your Canadian Tuxedo this week as we read Full Mountie by Ainsley Booth and Sadie Haller. It’s Canada Day and we’re here to make sure your beavers are extra frisky. Hope your True North is strong, free, and sexy cause we are ready to Mountie your ass, eh.  

Demons, Magicians, and a Girl, oh my! 

This is the most vanilla sex scene we have ever read. There are no demons, forked tongues, or clawed hands of any sort so brace yourselves as we read Her Soul to Take by Harley Laroux. They may be f*cking on sacred ground but there is nothing holy about this. Are you ready to sell your soul?

CONTENT WARNING: minor blood play and primal play.

Wizards, Dinos, and Mammoth Shafts, oh my! 

It’s Pride Month Smutz and you know we’ve got something TINGLY in store for yall. Magic clits at the ready as we read Trans Wizard Harriet Porber and the Bad Boy Parasaurolophus by, you guessed it, Chuck Tingle. Hope you like bad boy wizards with tattoos, a bowl cut, talons, and scales.  

Biting, Bleeding, and Boning, oh my! 

Haunting Adeline by H.D. Carlton has officially left us both speechless.  

CONTENT WARNING: consensual non-consent, gun-play, violence, murder, sex-trafficking, stalking.

Magic, Flying, and Typos, oh my!

She’s a little bit boring and his name is Justin. Welcome to another episode Smutz! It’s Mother’s Day and we are here to give you the orgasm you’ve been waiting for. Scrap that…you’ll need a spa day after reading One Little Secret by Maureen Child. Another white brunette with money problems!? Prepare to be thoroughly underwhelmed. 

Uncles, Cousins, and Estranged Nieces, oh no! 

Join the confusion smutz! They say love is a battlefield but they never mentioned uncle porn. Well, it’s definitely an internal war zone this week as we read Credence by Penelope Douglas. Will this book have you developing a new taboo kink or calling child services…we don’t know either. 

CONTENT WARNING: taboo, incest, and suicide 

Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit, OH MY! 

The heavens have opened on this most glorious of days. Welcome to our special orgasmic Easter Sunday Episode! Today’s sermon is brought to you by Sierra Simone’s Priest. Gather up your flock and prepare the eggs ‘cause the holy fertilization is upon us. Amen.   

CONTENT WARNING: suicide and child SA.