We all have something we want to change about ourselves. 

But whether it's quitting smoking, losing weight, or breaking some common bad habit, we feel a sense of failure when we don’t succeed. 

This can often set off a cascade of negative feelings and discouragement, 

making it even harder to change. 

The voice in our head telling us: Why bother?

In his profound book, How We Change: And Ten Reasons Why We Don’t 

Sociologist, pioneering psychotherapist, and author Dr. Ross Ellenhorn 

Takes a deep dive into this all too familiar experience as he unpacks 

the psychology and science of changing our lives for the better. 

Which he argues depends far more on understanding why we don’t change.

His research sheds an important light on how we are wired to double down on the familiar. 

A phenomenon he calls - 'The Fear of Hope' -

That very human and compassionate act of protecting ourselves from further disappointment. 

In today’s conversation we’ll dive deep into the topic of change as we,

Challenge the popular paradigm(s) of quick fixes, and 5 and 7 step lists. 

And examine what actually works. 

Some of which includes:

• The power of a caring relationship, 
• Contemplation,
• And learning to become a better friend to ourselves. 

Ross’s pioneering work offers us all an invitation to consider a fundamentally different approach.

One that may forever alter our perspective—

and finally help us achieve the transformation we truly seek

For more on Ross, his events, books, and research please visit ellenhorn.com

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Did you find this episode inspiring? Here are other conversations we think you'll love:

• On Listening and Attending to the Soul | James Hollis
• On Curiosity, Presence, and Love | Dr. Jacob Ham
• On Learning to Be a Better Friend to Ourselves | Megan Prager

Join Joshua on a NEW 6-month journey in uncovering how we can open our hearts and minds to live a more expansive life. 

A life that brings us alive. 

A life that is driven primarily by curiosity, wonder, and love (vs. certainty, control, and fear).

Learn more about and register for "From Fear to Love: A 6 Month Journey" here. 

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