Conflict is a part of life, no way around it. But conflict is like fire. Fire can heat your house and cook your food. It can also burn your house down. Conflict has two faces: it can be your friend, yet it can also decidedly work against you. Consider this:
1) All relationships involve conflict because there are no two people who agree on everything.
2) The problem is not the conflict itself, but how people relate to one another when they are in conflict.
3) Conflict is good and necessary because it elicits different points of view, clears the air, and makes it possible to resolve extraordinary complex issues.
Conflict becomes counter-productive & destructive when it turns personal. That is, when it begins to tap into the stories each one of us carries deep within our brains. Because of this, we must be vigilant to keep it centered externally on the mission we are trying to accomplish (paint the bathroom a certain color, move the corporation toward its desired future, and so on).