Our Fake History

Ahead of the Olympic Games there is always some discussion of the so-called "Olympic Spirit." This is a spirit of fair play and virtuous competition allegedly inherited from the ancient Greeks. But, a close look at the ancient Olympics and what you discover is that "sportsmanship" was in short supply. The Greeks had a "conquer or die" mentality at ancient Olympia. The most celebrated athletes were those who had sacrificed their lives for a taste of victory. Few batted an eye when athletes died during the competition. On top of that the rowdy festival that accompanied the games could be just as crass and commercial as any modern Olympics. How many Olympic ideals did we really inherit from the ancients? Tune- in and find out how some dudes named The Camel of Alexandria, Mr. Digits, and The Sprinkler all play a role in the story.

When the Olympic games were revived in the late 19th century there was a widespread belief in the "purity" of ancient Greek athletics. The original members of the International Olympic committee believed that the ancient Greek games at Olympia were noble and unblemished expressions of sporting virtue. They may have been viewing the past with rose-coloured glasses. The real ancient Olympics were rough, unhygienic, often corrupt and frequently violent. But, they were also super cool. The ancient games were rife with mythology and fake history. What should we believe about the ancient games? Tune-in and find out how ancient death races, Nazi propaganda, and the poop of 3000 oxen all play a role in the story.

In this throwback Sebastian does his best to get you geared up for an upcoming trilogy on the Olympics by returning to this much-loved episode on the mythical origins of popular sports. The question of who invented a particular sport can sometimes be a matter of national pride. As such sports history can become hotly contested. It should then come as no surprise that the origin stories of many popular sports are often riddled with historical myths. Tune in and find out how A Little Pretty Pocket Book, a civil war hero, and Sebastian losing his citizenship all play a role in the story.

There are few pieces of Hawaiian folklore as beloved as the tales of the Menehune. This group of pint-sized magical wonderworkers have been given credit for building a number of Hawaii's oldest structures. Legend has it that this group of dwarves were contracted by early Hawaiian chiefs to complete great feats of engineering in just one night. While these magical tales may seem fantastic, some have argued that they may contain kernels of historical truth. Were the Menehune actually the first Hawaiian settlers whose achievement have been literally dwarfed through storytelling? Or is there something else going on in this tradition? Tune-in and find out how shrimp payments, tiny Neanderthals, and mythical invasive species all play a role in the story.

On this throwback episode we revisit Episode #14 from Season One of the podcast. The Pacific Ocean is the most expansive body of water on planet earth. Despite this fact ancient people managed to venture forth into its immensity and create a civilization of incredible sophistication. The question of how the ancients managed to settle the Pacific perplexed academics for generations. This left the door open for some pretty wild theories about the origins of the Polynesians. Chief among these theorists was the Norwegian adventurer Thor Heyerdahl . Heyerdahl’s audacious stunts would make the world question the conventional wisdom on the Polynesians. But should his theories be trusted? Tune in and find out how stone giants, Gilligan’s Island, and the last cannibal on Fatu Hiva all play a role in the story.

Leonardo Da Vinci's Mona Lisa is undoubtedly the world's most famous painting. But, despite this, many visitors to the Louvre come away disappointed after they see the masterpiece. The real-life painting has a hard time living up to the myth of the "most perfect picture ever painted." How did the Mona Lisa go from being a well-regarded Da Vinci portrait to being an international celebrity? It seems like the 1911 theft of the painting from the Louvre completely changed the Mona Lisa's stature in the world of art. The question is, would she be this famous if she had never been stolen? Tune-in and find out how shaving in front of a Rembrandt, Paris Syndrome, and the worst guards ever all play a role in the story.

In the late 19th century many Victorian's were experiencing a crisis of faith. Changing technology and scientific breakthroughs had many questioning the traditional explanations of humanities place in the cosmos. Some reacted by seeking answers in the occult--- secret knowledge preserved in esoteric sources. In 1888 a group dedicated to exploring the occult known as the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn was founded in London. This group not only created a rigorous curriculum of occult study, they also developed a unique system of practical magic based on Jewish Kabbalah, ancient Egyptian rituals, and the writings of an ancient mage called Hermes Trismegistus. But, when a shocking revelation was made about the groups founding documents, the Order quickly splintered into competing factions. Was the Victorian era's most important magical society undone by fake history? Tune-in and find out how astral travel, magical tartans, and the wickedest man alive all play a role in the story.

In this throwback episode we revisit Episode #31 from Season 2. The Crimean War cavalry action known as “the charge of light brigade” was immortalized by the poet Alfred Lord Tennyson. The poet described a glorious charge into the mouth of hell carried out by men who would sooner die than disobey their orders. But is any of this actually true? What was the real charge of the light brigade? Why has one of history’s biggest military blunders been remembered so fondly? Tune in and find out how the sick man of Europe, being “sporting”, and a whole lot of donkeys play into the story.

In the Imjin year of 1592 the Japanese orchestrated a blitzkreig invasion of Korea. Within just two months they had captured both Seoul and Pyongyang. However, conquering Korea and holding Korea turned out to be two very different propositions. The victories of the Korean navy and the resistance orchestrated by guerilla groups known as "righteous armies" soon weakened the overextended Japanese. When Korea's the Ming Chinese allies finally arrived the war took a very different turn. But who should get the lions share of the credit when it comes to defeating the Japanese? The guerilla armies? The Chinese? Naval hero Admiral Yi Sunsin? Tune-in and find out how the Korean Zorro, the biggest helmet in the war, and a box full of hornets all play a role in the story.

When the Japanese army landed in Korea in 1592 the Korean defenders were woefully underprepared. Confused diplomacy and divisive court politics had hampered Korean preparations for the coming Japanese attack. The only Korean commander who came out looking good was the war hero Admiral Yi Sunsin. Admiral Yi is still remembered in South Korea as the most respected Korean to ever live. With a reputation that inflated is it possible to get an accurate understanding of Yi as a person? Tune-in and find out how heroic statues, baby pee, and some truly terrible battle plans all play a role in the story.