Patrick and Greg celebrate St. Patrick's Day with Irish storytelling of some of their own epic academic fails, interspersed with a selection of quantitative limericks submitted by Quantitude listeners (as well as a few of their own). The final selections are read by a special guest (who, be warned in advance, is a bit grumpy). Also mentioned: white elephants, nuns fighting, Garfield phones, apology tours, bear poop, the inverse of an eyeball, prune festivals, creative uses for up-lights, Piaget, chutney, Patrick and Gus’s special relationship, Patrick’s tombstone, stupid questions, and getting “Studented."

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Patrick and Greg have a blast hanging out with quant super-star Katherine Masyn, arguably one of the coolest people on earth. In addition to talking about professional development, the futility of making plans, and how to make meaningful contributions to science, the trio also discuss the power of three, mad cow disease, evaporated metal films, green laser pointers, mashed potatoes, and Patrick getting schooled on the non-binary nature of life, the universe, and everything else. Finally, for those listeners using Quantitude as a drinking game, you must drink every time Katherine says "et cetera." Cheers!

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Greg and Patrick start with what seems like a reasonable metaphor linking musical compositions to planned missing data designs, and then they proceed to beat it to death. Then, just when you think they've buried it, they dig it back up and beat the carcass some more before eventually just running out of time. In addition to planned missing designs, they also mention the Kenny G paternity test, every trumpet player's sworn duty, tied 16th notes, Benny und die Jets, the Durham Bullhorns, wastebasket toilets, free steak knives, 81 minutes, doors and flashlights, Alyssa, Jay and Sean, and respecting the dart. 

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In Episode 16 of Quantitude, Patrick and Greg have more fun than is probably socially acceptable when talking about missing data. In addition to embracing the Zen-like paradox of "the presence of missing data," they also discuss West Point, "is" versus "are," middle school English teachers, relentless tenacity, talking narwhals, being completely pregnant, taking in shows at Cat's Cradle, circus tents, and books by Richard Bachman.

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Greg and Patrick embark on a free-ranging discussion of many of the things no one bothers to tell you when entering academia, some that were particularly (and often pleasantly) surprising. They also talk about learning to fly, parenting, Richard Russo, Bayesian personality, Craisins, just noticeable differences, crayon giraffes, academic mulligans, final_final_final drafts, dead birds, Britney Spears, volitional reinvention, unconditional atta'boys, and the academic Pez dispenser. 

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Patrick and Greg take on the topic of model evaluation and fit, particularly as applied to structural equation models. They also discuss compulsive counting, mashed potatoes, letting the horses out of the barn, building model 747s, Jenga, Moses's third tablet, the Pirate Code, demon conferences, and Roo Mates. 

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Greg and Patrick pursue several topics raised on prior episodes on scale reliability and measurement invariance to their logical conclusion. Namely, they ponder the multitude of persnickety issues associated with putting a set of items into the psychometric sausage maker to grind out scale scores for use in subsequent analysis. In addition to bickering with one another over a host of trivial issues, they also discuss Neil Peart, needless aggression, time travel, rapping the MMPI, paying the reaper, pokes in the eye, circling the drain, and using the word "imbricate."

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In this episode, Patrick and Greg respond to a call-in question that raises a host of issues revolving around measurement invariance testing. In addition to complaining about horrible terminology commonly used in quantitative methodology, they also address pirate mothers, irreverance, time machines, quadruple negatives, buying firewood, digging up bodies, the Schotz clock, and dumpster fires. There are also return appearances of Whac-a-Mole and the poking stick. 

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In Part 2 of a two-part series, Greg and Patrick draw on their experiences with the National Institutes of Health and the Institute of Education Sciences (as grant PI/co-PI, reviewer, panelist, and panel chair) to offer recommendations for those planning to seek funding for their own research projects. They also talk about a thousand monkeys, stages of grief, Southwest vs. Spirit Airlines, proper use of the word "however," Red Bull, and banana peels.

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In Part 1 of a two-part series, Patrick and Greg draw on their experiences with the National Institutes of Health and the Institute of Education Sciences (as grant PI/co-PI, reviewer, panelist, and panel chair) to discuss aspects of the grant review process, including the scoring criteria, conflicts of interest, what it's like "in the room," and what happens after grants are reviewed. They also talk about turkey legs, sausage making, acronym-based drinking games, hairy eyeballs, roller coasters, and Pink Floyd: The Wall.

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