Today’s Soft-Hitting stories: Irish Goldfish Won At Fundraiser 20 Years Ago Possibly World’s Oldest, Colt Seman’s Airion Company Reinventing The Piss Trap For Female Fighter Pilots, Quicksand At Michigan Beach Makes Couple Official, Scottish Badminton Player Kirsty Gilmour Overturns Unfair Yellow Card Penalty Due To Her Menstrual Cycle, ‘Pot Heads’ Flock To This Year’s Le Creuchella To Score Discounted Le Crueset Ware, Spanish Woman Busted For Faking Muteness And Receiving Insurance Payouts

Plus Today’s Headlines: Pope Frances Tolerates Our Baby Boy JD Vance During Quick Easter Visit, When Easter Lands On 4/20 Stoners Don’t Miss The Opportunity To Praise and Bake,  Petey Hegseth Shared Highly Confidential Security Details In Second Signal Chat, Nasa’s Oldest Active Astronaut Don Pettit Turned 70 During Descent To Earth, Beijing Hosted First Half Marathon Including 21 Humanoid Robots, Elizabeth Hurley and Billy Ray Cyrus Go instagram Official In Bunny Ears

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Chapters:

00:00 Intro

02:15 Headlines

09:47 Oldest Goldfish?

13:42 A New Piss-Trap

16:30 Quicksand Meet Cute

21:15 Aunt Flow Badminton

24:00 Le Creuchella

28:09 Woman Fakes Muteness

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