It’s been a messy start to today, SayWhovia. Literally. But we’re going to get through it together. 

Because this week, we have a delicious meal to serve up, straight from the best kitchens of the Trump golf courses. Or, from a kitchen of a Trump golf course. Come learn about the new grift!

And if you feel like you’re in too deep, Dan and Maureen will send one of the new Eric Adams lifeguard drones. It won’t save you—but it will soothe you.

Come sit down, SaysWhovia. It’s time to eat.

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SaysWhovia! Maureen is off to become a lobbiest (no really) and Dan is back in Chicago—home of The Pope, did you hear—and Bruce Springsteen is on tour out of the country where apparently he might want to stay because Donald Trump is Super Big Mad about things he said, which is a normal thing that happens. In fact, lots of normal things are happening, like RFK Junior swimming in sewage, Donald Trump being followed around the Middle East by a roving McDonalds, and JD Vance trying to kill the new Pople, who is from Chicago if you haven't heard.

Anyway, nobody's at The Friends Expereince anymore

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Dan was in New York over the weekend and Maureen wanted to give him a window into authentic NYC living by taking him to The Friends Experience. Yes, the TV show that Dan has never seen.

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Maureen is in Philadelphia, enjoying the greenery and the ticks. Dan is in Chicago, enjoying his basement. And tariffs. Yes, it’s Tariff Talking Time! How do you put a tariff on a movie? We’re about to find out maybe!

Also, If you’ve been planning on getting into hacking, now is a great time. The US is operating on tutorial level. Now you too can read state secrets!

Everything is generally smart and good and running well.

Stock up on fireworks and get over here, SaysWhovia. We’re going to read some texts!

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Dan and Maureen think you need a break. They want to talk to you about some good television and games. Give your mind a rest. Renew yourself. Also, Trump and Elon are taking a break, so there’s the tie in! Also, Maureen wants to take Dan to the Friends Experience and explain to him what “we were on a break!” is about! He has no idea!

Also, tariffs! Canada! And beans!

So much about beans.

Sit down, SaysWhovia. Grab a fork. Maureen’s cooking up a pot of something oblong and high in protein!

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You guys. 

You guys. 

You guys. 

You guys. 

He killed the Pope.
 

Preorder The Creeping Hand Murder here: https://www.mysteriousbookshop.com/products/maureen-johnson-jay-cooper-you-are-the-detective-the-creeping-hand-murder-preorder-signed?_pos=2&_sid=266ae0085&_ss=r

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This week, Dan and Maureen are joined by Akilah Hughes to talk about…something. 

Akilah and Dan definitely want to talk about something, but they’re being so cagey about it.

VOTE REBEL SPIRIT here: https://vote.webbyawards.com/PublicVoting#/2025/podcasts/limited-series-specials/diversity-equity-inclusion-belonging

And preorder The Creeping Hand Murder here: https://www.mysteriousbookshop.com/products/maureen-johnson-jay-cooper-you-are-the-detective-the-creeping-hand-murder-preorder-signed?_pos=2&_sid=266ae0085&_ss=r

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It's Tariff Time over in SaysWhovia! Let's all celebrate the return of American manufacturing, which is absolutely going to happen.

Also, please help Dan. He is not okay.

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We don’t know what the Day of Liberation holds for the economy, but obviously it’s going to be great. 

Right now, Cory Booker is still talking, health services are shutting down, and it’s maybe too much to take in in one bite. Small bites, SaysWhovia. Share the load. Work in shifts. Take a walk. Come to Maureen’s for dinner. She can stretch a lentil.

Grab a spoon, SaysWhovia. It’s time to eat!

Says Who is made possible by you, through your support of our Patreon at patreon.com/sayswho

Check your phone, SaysWhovia. You're in the groupchat.
 

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