Why do so many people seem to resist self-compassion? Dr. Chris Germer, co-creator of the Mindful Self-Compassion program, joins Forrest to explore how we can work with the deeply ingrained shame that gets in the way.

Dr. Germer shares common misunderstandings about self-compassion, and they discuss the complex interplay between shame, self-criticism, and our capacity for self-care. Forrest focuses on the paradox of self-compassion: how approaching it as a “solution to your problems” actually gets in the way of it helping you out. Dr. Germer then shares the model of safety, challenge, and overwhelm, including how we can use it to guide our practice, get to the bottom of shame, and avoid burnout along the way.

You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:30: What people get wrong about self-compassion 

5:10: Tender vs. fierce self-compassion, and the “paradox of practice”

11:35: Shame and self-compassion

17:35: Safety, challenge, and overwhelm

23:30: Holding ourselves before holding our experience

31:45: Burnout, and inner-kindness vs. external approval

37:35: Getting to the bottom of shame, and loving ourselves up

42:00: Applying mindfulness to self-compassion practice

48:40: Overzealousness, and clarity of intention

53:10: Motivating ourselves

57:00: Recap

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