Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You

By Cathy ChenParenting Kids & Family

Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You episodes

February 12, 2025Helping Teens Build Healthy Self-Esteem: Signs, Strategies, and Growth Mindset Tips
As coaches, we often come across self-confidence issues among teens; whether it be deep insecurity or grandiosity. So, today we wanted to discuss self-esteem, when it’s healthy and unhealthy, and signs that your teenager may be struggling with their self-esteem. Tuning in, you’ll learn about the signs of low self-esteem to look out for, when arrogance is masking itself as self-confidence, how kids with high self-esteem present, and so much more! We delve into how parents can help their kids build a good sense of self before discussing the danger of comparison. We even talk about how you can help your teenagers build a growth mindset! Finally, hear about the importance of showing your children unconditional love, even when they mess up. Thanks for listening!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:08] The topic of today’s episode: self-esteem.
[0:02:05] What healthy self-esteem looks like and signs of low self-esteem.
[0:10:03] How parents can contribute to helping their child build strong self-esteem.
[0:16:32] The dangers of comparing your experience to your child’s.
[0:20:54] Helping your kids develop a growth mindset.
[0:25:56] The importance of showing your kids love, even when disappointed in them.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
29 min
February 06, 2025College Visits 101: Essential Tips & Do's/Don'ts for Parents and Teens
Cathy and Meredith are back with another episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, and this time, they’re tackling the wild world of college visits! From planning the trip to squeezing the most out of every campus tour and, most importantly, figuring out what actually matters once you’re there, they’ve got you covered. Tune in to find out why signing up for the official college tour is a must, which parent-approved tours should really be optional add-ons, and what students should do before stepping foot on campus. They’re sharing the ultimate do’s and don’ts of college visits, why it’s crucial to "pop the hood" on every school, and how to take notes that actually help when decision time rolls around. If you’re a parent gearing up for college tour season, this is one episode you don’t want to miss. Start listening now!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:00] We introduce today’s topic of conversation: how to visit colleges.
[0:02:10] Step one: make an appointment!
[0:02:45] Our street cred when it comes to college visits.
[0:04:00] Options for visiting colleges and how to sign up.
[0:05:20] The type of tour parents think is a good idea, but really should be an add-on.
[0:06:55] What to do once you arrive at the college for your tour.
[0:08:40] We share helpful tips for kids to do before they go on college tours.
[0:12:10] Looking past a bad tour guide: what to look for on your tour.
[0:14:20] Why we don’t recommend multiple college tours a day.
[0:16:00] Getting off script and peeking under the hood (of the school!)
[0:16:30] The importance of making notes and documenting your time on tour.
[0:18:40] A tip for parents: helping your kid to ask the right questions.
[0:21:00] Writing “life” observations when on tour (and what is meant by that!)
[0:22:50] Now that the tour is finished: what not to do, parents!
[0:25:30] The importance of the exploratory phase of college tours.
[0:27:45] Getting what you want without strongarming your kid.
[0:29:00] What you don’t want as a result of a college tour.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
32 min
January 29, 2025Secrets to Success Every Straight A Student Knows
Does it seem like your teens are just coasting through school, disengaged, bored, and overwhelmed? In this episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, Cathy and Meredith explore the challenges teens face in academics and how parents can help them thrive. From fostering engagement in boring classes to building effective study habits, you’ll learn actionable strategies for overcoming obstacles like disorganized time management, over-scheduling, and distractions. You’ll also find out why sleep, nutrition, and routine are vital for your teen’s academic success and discover the power of small goals, rewards, study groups, and time-management methods like the Pomodoro Technique. Want to empower the teen in your life to take control of their education? Don’t miss these tips and tricks to help them navigate school with confidence!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:02:02] Top academic challenges and engagement issues.
[0:04:02] Study groups, connecting with teachers, and other tips to tackle boring classes.
[0:07:18] The need to adapt study habits to curriculum changes and seek teacher feedback.
[0:09:50] Common studying pitfalls: cramming, ineffective homework practices, and more!
[0:13:15] How distractions and poor study spaces impact focus and learning.
[0:16:47] Role of timing, sleep, nutrition, and boundaries in academic performance.
[0:22:55] Teaching teens to chunk time and balance academics with other priorities.
[0:25:39] Keys to leveraging the Pomodoro Technique and positive reinforcement.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Learning How to Learn: How to Succeed in School Without Spending All Your Time Studying
'Learning How to Learn: Powerful mental tools to help you master tough subjects'
Pomodoro Technique
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
28 min
January 22, 2025College Admissions Deferrals & the LOCI: What Your Teen Needs to Know
Deferrals—what do they mean, and what should your teenager do next? In this episode of Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, we dive into the world of college admissions deferrals, breaking down the process, and provide actionable advice for crafting a standout Letter of Continued Interest (LOCI). In our conversation, we explore what colleges are really looking for and why the LOCI might not matter as much as you think. Discover misconceptions about the admissions process, find out why institutional priorities often outweigh student talent, and hear about the common LOCI pitfalls to avoid. Join us to learn about the ins and outs of college admissions and the secret behind crafting a compelling LOCI. Tune in now!

Key Points From This Episode:
[0:00:45] Introduction and outline of today's topic.
[0:02:06] What deferral means and how a LOCI can (and can’t) impact an application.
[0:04:37] Learn the dos and don'ts of writing a compelling and concise LOCI.
[0:06:15] How a typical LOCI is structured, what to include, and the accepted writing style.
[0:11:42] Why overloading admissions officers with new materials can hurt your chances.
[0:12:54] Find out why colleges require a LOCI for deferred applications.
[0:14:42] Uncover why Cathy thinks deferrals and LOCIs are tied to business strategies.
[0:17:23] Explore the reasons why a student may be removed from a waitlist.
[0:19:35] Final takeaways and why the LOCI is nothing worth stressing about.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
23 min
January 15, 2025Can You Really F-Up Your Kids? Parenting Myths, Mistakes, and the Truth About Raising Teens
All parents worry about traumatizing their children. The truth is, if you’re a present parent who makes your child feel loved, screwing them up isn’t very likely! Today on Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, we discuss whether or not you can f-up your kids. In this conversation, you’ll find out why we believe it’s quite difficult to f-up your children, the complex combination of factors that typically cause dysfunction, how to ensure your child feels loved, accepted, important, and prioritized, and much more! We delve into finding a balance between over-parenting and under-parenting and why you can’t expect your teens to think and act like adults. We also explore why making mistakes won’t damage your children, important reasons to stay curious as a parent, and why constantly criticizing your children is probably the only thing that will actually screw them up. Thanks for tuning in!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:03:24] Today’s topic of discussion: how not to f-up your kids!
[0:04:24] Why traumatizing your children is quite unlikely.
[0:06:39] How a combination of factors causes dysfunction in youth, not a single thing.
[0:07:54] Why it’s imperative that your child feels love and acceptance to develop healthily.
[0:10:28] Finding the happy medium between over-parenting and under-parenting.
[0:14:59] The dangers of expecting your teenager to think and act like an adult.
[0:19:09] Why you don’t need to get everything right all the time as a parent.
[0:20:47] The importance of staying curious in parenting and including teens in decisions.
[0:24:50] Defining what high expectations and high support mean to us.
[0:27:15] One surefire way to make your child feel unloved: criticize them.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
32 min
January 09, 2025Teen Stress and Anxiety: Expert Tips from Jenn Gaskin, Educator, Mom, and Yoga Teacher
Today's generation of children has a remarkable knack for deconstructing the world around them. They reject judgment, advocate for inclusivity, and go to great lengths to ensure every disenfranchised voice has a seat at the table. And let’s be honest—no one calls out hypocrisy quite like a teenager! Joining Cathy and Meredith to dive into an insightful discussion, is their friend, Jenn Gaskin. Tune in to learn more about Jenn, the challenges she’s observed with today’s generation, and the positives and negatives of their approach to life. The discussion touches on adolescent distress tolerance, managing teenagers, and supporting their nervous system and anxiety. Jenn also shares practical tools to help kids navigate stress and anxiety, along with advice for parents to help their children thrive through adolescence. Don’t miss this insightful conversation—start listening now!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:00] How Cathy met their guest, Jenn Gaskin.
[0:04:30] More incredible details about our guest, Jenn Gaskin.
[0:06:30] The changes Jenn’s noticed, for better or worse, with our kids today.
[0:07:55 The primary no-no with today’s generation.
[0:09:47] The things that worry her about this generation.
[0:12:20] They delve into a discussion about the level of adolescent distress tolerance.
[0:16:15] The [not] “cliff notes version” Jenn wants parents to know about managing teenagers, their nervous systems, and anxiety.
[0:24:50] Coping with anxiety: Jenn unpacks practical tools to help kids navigate anxiety.
[0:30:15] How Jenn helped her own five children manage their anxiety.
[0:34:00] Advice to parents navigating their children through adolescence.
[0:36:15] A story of how the home atmosphere influences the thinking capability of students.
[0:41:20] Sign up for the Village Mailing list to hear about upcoming workshops.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Jenn Gaskin on LinkedIn
Jenn Gaskin
Jenn Gaskin Email
Gaskin Tutoring
The Price of Privilege
The Irreducible Needs Of Children
Village Coaches
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
42 min
December 18, 2024Debunking the Myths: The Power of a Liberal Arts Education
Most kids have no idea what a liberal arts education really is, or why it might be a great choice! Today on Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, we discuss a liberal arts education, why it’s beneficial, and so much more! We delve into what makes a liberal arts college unique, how it differs from a traditional university, the benefits of this kind of education, and what a liberal arts degree can be used for. We go on to discuss Meredith’s experience of being a liberal arts major and how it gave her an exploratory mindset before sharing our take on how kids can create relatively ordinary careers after studying abstract liberal arts degrees. We even tell you about 3+2/4+1 programs and how they work. Lastly, we remind you of the benefits of choosing a liberal arts program for your studies and encourage you not to ignore that as an option. Thanks for tuning in!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:01:50] Today’s topic of discussion: defending liberal arts majors.
[0:02:54] We explain what a liberal arts education actually is.
[0:07:52] Some examples of liberal arts colleges in the USA.
[0:09:57] What a liberal arts degree can be used for career-wise.
[0:13:19] The benefits of having a liberal arts education (according to Meredith).
[0:22:56] How to make a ‘normal’ career from an abstract liberal arts degree.
[0:31:01] A breakdown of what the 3+2/4+1 programs are and how they work.
[0:33:14] We encourage you not to discount liberal arts programs as options for studies.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
36 min
December 11, 2024 The Real Talk on Teen Substance Use: Bella’s Story and What Parents Need to Know
Have you equipped your teen to make informed choices about substance use? During this episode, Bella, a Senior at a Boarding School back East, joins us to share the inside scoop of what’s really going on at teen parties. Since the start of her high school career, she has been involved in advocating for teens with substance abuse issues. Join us for a look behind the scenes at what motivates kids to use substances at a young age including social pressure and the problem of mental health. We discuss the age-old belief that it’s safer to allow your kids to drink at home, and Bella offers her perspective on how easy it is for adults to tell if a young person is abusing substances. You’ll also hear about the level of access that suburban teens have to illegal substances, and Bella’s opinion on what it might look like to nurture an open and honest relationship with your child from a young age. This conversation also emphasizes the importance of educating your kids rather than punishing them. Thanks for tuning in.
37 min
December 11, 2024Mastering Letters of Recommendation: How to Stand Out in College Applications
Letters of recommendation are so important in college applications, especially in the more selective colleges, and today, we are delving into why they need to be prioritized, the mistakes we see kids make, who to ask for letters, and more. Tuning in, you’ll hear all about the role of letters of recommendation in college applications, the dangers of focusing on the number of letters you have over the quality of them, how it can become the determining factor for whether or not you get into a college, and so much more! We delve into the intricacies of the questionnaire the recommender will have to ask you before discussing the kinds of people teenagers should ask for letters of recommendation from. We even talk about why building relationships with teachers is imperative in building communication skills and how that will help future letters of recommendation and even make learning more fun. Finally, we pinpoint which kids get the best letters of recommendation and explain why they’re always the hardest workers. Thanks for listening!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:02:30] Today’s topic of discussion: letters of recommendation.
[0:03:23] The role of letters of recommendation in college applications.
[0:03:58] Why letters of recommendation are so important in applications.
[0:09:48] Where things go off the rails when it comes to these letters.
[0:13:53] All about the questionnaires that you have to fill out with the letter.
[0:15:32] The logistics surrounding asking for letters of recommendation.
[0:17:25] The importance of developing relationships with your teachers.
[0:22:15] Why the kids who work hard get the best letters.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
25 min
November 27, 2024Purpose-Driven Parenting: Helping Your Teen Find Their Path & Boost Their Well-Being
Having a sense of purpose has been scientifically proven to increase your overall quality of life! So many college application essays are based on identity and most kids who find writing those essays easier have a sense of purpose already! Today on Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You, we are discussing the importance of developing a sense of purpose in teenagers. In this discussion, you’ll hear what purpose actually is, why having purpose is imperative, how you can help kids find their own, and how your own identity as a parent can affect your child’s sense of self. We talk about how your purpose will contribute to your overall wellness before delving into how you can find your purpose by identifying your values and getting out of your comfort zone. We even tell you why creating boundaries can inspire your kids into action! Finally, we encourage you to try a values exercise with your children. Thanks for listening!
Key Points From This Episode:
[0:00:59] Today’s topic: helping seniors prepare essays about their identities.
[0:03:11] We define what purpose actually is and why it’s so important to have.
[0:06:30] How to help kids figure out what their purpose could be.
[0:10:07] Understanding how having a sense of purpose increases your overall quality of life.
[0:14:30] How your sense of purpose as a parent will affect your child’s own identity.
[0:20:06] Why purpose contributes to overall wellness and happiness.
[0:24:30] Getting out of your comfort zone and identifying your values to find your purpose.
[0:27:41] How to help your kids past procrastination, anxiety, and fear of essay writing.
[0:31:01] Purpose changing through life and something we’ve done that ties to our purpose.
Links Mentioned in Today’s Episode:
Every Move You Make, I’ll Be Watching You: Why Modeling is Your Parenting Secret Weapon
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You
Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You on Instagram
40 min

About Sh*t Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You

From the publisher's feed

Shit Your Teenagers Won’t Tell You brings you candid conversations with experts in psychology, education, and college admissions — so you can better understand your teen and help them…