SMARTER THAN TRAUMA Podcast

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That anything is to relive it in vivid replay memory & it did not happen. It wasn't the easiest thing to look at & I did not read word for word & the parts that were hardest I put in a moment of scrolling, zooming in on these words, "blunt (closed) injury: The head sustains a violent blow or is whipped back and forth, causing the brain to bounce or twist inside the skull. Common causes include brain to..." <---losing it so we ptSTOPd. Stopped, past tense. 

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...just write it.

That Super Bowl party where I made a strong boundary.

And what I did to remove it---go to The Lodge--happiest place in Gold Coast imho.

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At some point, The 2nd step will happen with the 1st step. 

What is the first step?

What is the second step?

(clue in Episode Title)

The success of this curriculum is dependent on the "classroom," & if everyone fails a test, there's a problem with the test. But in this case, perhaps there is an issue with desIRE so let's get FIRED UP to end trauma for everyone, not just those some who have abuse of power, use optics, have tactics like lying & avoiding & continual contradictions that cannot be explained. 

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When you can put [audio] files in folders (voice memos) & count to answer HOW MANY? to track frequency, duration & intensity, it makes it easier. I will be able to SAVE THESE FILES & then delete all of it, but every "first time" I record. The first time becomes the last time. 24 hours over two days worth of adrenaline was created by ___ + ___ (tag twats!) and just give it back to them. 

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Actually, I'm going to use THIS DAY--June 5th--so just one day behind. Not years. Vast improvement since the difference is... the trauma truly is GONE. How do I know? I do not feel it--that adrenaline & no memories on replay & why I'm so glad that I took these notes! Ta-da

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The WORST is when someone can't answer a question.

Make the question a Y/N question. Then really listen to their answer. Still can't answer? They're trying to get ahead (deflect, distract, emote by sharing their mental health or trauma or call you mentally ill or use your trauma against you).

I am reminded, but the DIFFERENCE is it's not in my body. Finally! It's because I made some decisions. 

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When you hear a word & an entire memory comes up!!!

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The NEXT GOAL once I could a) hear self, b) control ptsd, c) ID suicide/SI & "flick" it away (yay!) & realize that universe really does align. The very thing I've been doing---holding all this paperwork was/is a necessary thing, sure, but the evidence is in the LIFE ANEW created.  In special ed, as the teacher/writer, I wrote 4 goals (one per quarter) + a statement stating WHAT WILL THE STUDENT BE ABLE TO DO.

Once I tackle, a), b), c) & d) then go into decision-making (that principal that was allegedly data driven, but great campaign & I voted for that!) to KEEP or ABANDON since the project is finally coming into focus. A short story about... JUST LISTEN AGAIN. 

SAVED THIS IDEA in modern day "stone." Supposed to last forever. The internet? The ultimate container.

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real-life personal experience

all of this violence has a purpose 

make sure we don't do this to each other...

temporary insane. (I do sound "elevated")

Predator & Prey <---the cats & putting bird seed on the balcony so they would "stalk" the birds & could remove "stalking."

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