January 3

Buy the book!

Having a bad week? What about a bad day? How was yesterday? They are not all going to be great. The best you can hope is that you make it to your pillow sober and hopefully have a pillow when you get there. Bad things happen in sobriety, too. It’s going to happen. No, really. Say that out loud right now, “Bad things happen in sobriety, too. It’s going to happen.” The sooner you move your brain into that position, the sooner you will appreciate the challenges this life offers you.

Reflections

What am I afraid of? Sometimes it helps to name our enemies, write them down, and make plans to banish them. But do I even own a damn pen?

Daily Challenge

Write down your fears. Make a list of what you fear the most in the next 24 hours. At the end of the day, revisit this list and ask yourself if these things happened today.

January 2

Support us by buying the book!

No matter how long you have been sober, you will find the thought of a drink/drug can climb up in your brain and stay there like a wedgy from sixth grade! But you must remember, as they say, “this too shall pass.” And it does. When this happens, take a deep breath, call someone on your team (counselor, friend, sponsor, etc.), and don’t hesitate to talk about it. It’s natural for you to think this way; we don’t change overnight without a real diligent effort to face these thoughts when they arise. They should not be ignored, and you should not be ashamed of having them. They are what they are.

Reflections

When was the last time you thought of getting fucked up? No. Not that time; the last time you really thought of getting shit-faced? Remember that time? What did you do then? Did you do the right thing or the wrong thing? Was your choice a vice or a virtue?

Daily Challenge

Take a walk around the block today. Get the body moving. If you can’t walk, do some chair exercises for 15 minutes. But get moving. Maybe get your spouse, boyfriend/girlfriend, or dog to do it with you.

January 1

So, this is the first day of the year. It’s just another day, don’t make such a big-ass deal about it. If your New Year’s resolution was to get sober and you started today, you might want to get shit-faced right now. It never works when we “put X’s on calendars.” It’s been repeatedly proven that if you have not reached your “bottom” (or close to it), you probably aren’t motivated to follow through. How many times have you made these bold gestures in the past? When was the last time you promised (yourself or someone else) that you wouldn’t do this anymore?

Reflections

Are you getting sober for yourself, or was it someone else’s idea? Are you staying sober today out of fear, habit, joy, or happiness?

Daily Challenge

Say “Hi” to a stranger today. The crossing guard, the mail carrier, or your neighbor. But do it with a huge smile on your face! See how it changes your day to add light to someone else’s.

December 31

Buy the book. Start the New Year right!

When I left Southern California in 1989, on New Year’s Eve, I had been up for 3 days after buying an eightball of meth with my buddies. I had about a half-gram left when I got into my car to drive to Central Minnesota. I suspected I was being followed by the police/feds somewhere in New Mexico, and the paranoia set in. I saw strange things for the next 24 hours. I have come to find out it was a Blue Moon on that New Year’s Eve, and everything was visible that night. I saw hot-air-balloon-like floating houses across farm fields, trees on fire that walked into the road, whales harpooned by telephone poles on the side of the road, and all the while, a shadowy figure crawled in and out of my vehicle as I drove. As I made my way up Highway 29 in Iowa, I pulled into a gas station in a tiny town where a teenage boy was working the gas station and cash register. As I paid for my gas, I debated whether I should rob the young man. I didn’t have a gun, but I thought I might be able to intimidate him into giving me the money. As I stood there debating whether I should do it, I realized I was having this conversation out loud. The kid appeared confused, as I am sure he had never experienced someone talking to himself out loud, debating whether he should rob the store.

Reflections

Stop living life in the light of a Blue Moon.

Daily Challenge

Don’t run. Face the change. Stay.

December 30

Buy the book before it's too late!

“Before you begin the journey, you own the journey. Once you have begun, the journey owns you.” – Old Proverb

Start where you are. There is no better time to start than right now. Take stock. Take ownership of the road that you are on. We do not get to pick the cards we are dealt. But, we do get to play the hand to the best of our ability. The best way I could play this hand was in the recovery process of the Twelve Steps. Once I was on this path, it was up to me to see it through. To “stay on the beam” and apply the knowledge and faith needed to continue. After that, the rest is about letting go and trusting the process. When I am fearful or full of anxiety and think my way will work better, I am often proved wrong, but those are the mistakes I get to and need to learn today. “So, what are you waiting for? An engraved invitation?” Jump on the fun bus!

Reflections

Am I trying to manage my own recovery? Am I working my own program?

Daily Challenge

Have you trusted someone other than yourself lately?

December 29

Buy the book! Start your New Year right!

Slow the fuck down. This is not a race. You’re not going to get any more sober than you are today. There is a saying in the rooms of recovery: “Don’t get too well, too soon.” They say it for a reason. The life you want to live will take time to accumulate and work through. Like your favorite gifts, some assembly is required, and the batteries are never included. You didn’t get sick overnight, so it stands to reason that you can’t get well overnight, either. So, take your time, buy the ticket, and enjoy the ride. And F.Y.I., a new car or new job does not a healthy person make. The lessons we need to learn are often not found at the bottom of well-funded bank accounts. So, again, slow the fuck down and take it easy.

Reflections

Are you getting too well, too soon? How do you know?

Daily Challenge

Ask a friend how you are doing? No friends? You’re probably not doing that well. Get off the couch and go get a friend.

December 28

Buy the book!

What are you better at than anyone else you know? What unique qualities or ways of doing something do you have? What energizes you? Do that. Do fucking more of that! Far too often, we are stuck in our minds and complaining about what we don’t have. Addicts and alcoholics frequently come from a sense of lack and absence. Some famous person once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” If you are sitting around focused on what others have, you will miss your opportunity to share what you have. And that’s where the real joy comes from - not from getting something you don’t have, but from sharing what you have.

Reflections

What can you put into the stream of life rather than pull from?

Daily Challenge

Define your unique qualities. Please write them down so that when the time comes, you know exactly what you’re capable of doing.

December 27

Buy the book.

I desire peace, love, and contentment. That’s what I want. It’s not too much to ask, is it? Of course, it is. The entire course of humanity is filled with people wanting the same things. Books have been written, wars have been waged, and fortunes made and squandered for the same desires. What makes me think I will be any different? I guess I still have hope. In the last eight years, I have made so many changes - and most have resulted in very positive outcomes - that I don’t see why those loftier and higher things are not achievable, too. If I stay the course and continue to do what I have been doing, this is the mindset that has sustained my energy and attitude. During my worst days of sobriety (living life sober), I have seen the lessons and tried to enjoy the ride as much as possible. Even when the ride seemed to be down the shit-filled sewer. I have remained teachable and looked forward to the next adventure.

Reflections

“You better decide early on if you're a Tigger or an Eeyore.” – Randy Pausch (The Last Lecture) – Which one are you?

Daily Challenge

Have some fucking fun.

December 26

BUY THE BOOK WITH YOUR AMAZON GIFT CARD!

“A man is happy so long as he chooses to be happy.” – Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

You have agency. It’s not a term we throw around a lot these days. The word “agency” usually refers to a place of business, but in this case, it refers to the ability to act or intervene. In sobriety, one of the things we quickly learn is that our negative actions have negative consequences, and they aren’t exactly what we would like. We commonly think of this concept in negative terms, but flipping the script illustrates its positive nature. You have the power of agency today and can make positive choices to impact positive consequences. Not everything is out of your control. Sometimes, we don’t have to accept certain things, especially when we do have the power to change them. So, choose to be different. Choose to use your agency. Choose, but choose wisely.

Reflections

Do I choose what I think, or do I choose how to think?

Daily Challenge

Look for the positive in every situation today. Just try it.

December 25

Buy the book! (makes a great gift to yourself?)

Think back to your most fucked up moments. Yes. That one. Aren’t you glad you don’t have to do that anymore? One of my own was on Christmas Eve, and I had no idea, at the moment, what day it actually was. A Christmas song came on the radio as I was in my car in front of my family’s home. I had opened my door and had one leg out of the car door when I could not remember if I was coming or going. Most of you who read this will understand what the above means; so out of touch with reality and lost to the world. I hope you never have to know that feeling again. And just like me, most of you will be celebrating some form of Christmas. You probably didn’t buy yourself a gift, so consider this day of being sober a present to yourself.

Reflections

Why is Christmas so hard for the active alcoholic/addict? What makes it seem so much more hopeless?

Daily Challenge

Watch your favorite Christmas movie, or buy yourself a gift.