Stephing Up

Do you know those people who move through life without ever seeming to be in a rush? They have full-time jobs, kids, a house, places to be... and somehow they never seem overwhelmed. As a hot mess myself, it got me thinking: what are they actually doing differently?

I run a planning business and I've spent most of my adult life feeling like I'm running behind. For years I thought the answer was to get more organised, more disciplined, up earlier. But you can have a beautifully organised calendar and still feel completely overwhelmed by everything that's in it. So I looked into the psychology of overwhelm and found 7 habits that calm people share.

This episode is for you if:

• Everyone else seems to have it together and you're constantly chasing your tail
• You tick off every single thing on your to-do list and still finish the day feeling like you achieved nothing
• You're exhausted on the days that, on paper, weren't even that busy
• You're constantly deciding you need a whole new routine, starting Monday
• The silly season is already coming at you like a freight train

In this episode, you'll learn:

• The 7 habits of people who rarely get overwhelmed
• Why we're so wildly optimistic about what fits in a day (it's called the planning fallacy) and how to plan for your actual capacity
• Why you don't need to fill every spare minute, and what "time affluence" has to do with feeling rushed
• Why we've started confusing responsiveness with reliability
• How you can be a good friend, partner, sister or mother without being constantly available
• How a study on checking email three times a day changed how I tackle my inbox (and lowered my stress)
• Why having the time to do something isn't the same as having the capacity for it
• How to build a bare minimum version of your routines
• What a study of 53,000 people found about what time management is really for
• Why just because you could, doesn't mean you should

And tell me: what's your "I'll just quickly..."? (Mine is Kmart. It has never once been quick.)

…

What should you listen to next?

Turning 36: 6 Life Lessons + 6 Hacks I Wish I Knew Sooner

Automate Your Life: 7 Things I Never Have To Think About Again

…

Follow Stephing Up

I'm Steph Pase, your (somewhat) organised bestie in your ears. This podcast is about growth that's messy, building a life that actually fits you, and what happens when life doesn't go to plan. We'll talk mental health, motherhood, business, ADHD and how to stop being such an asshole to yourself.

New episodes drop every Monday morning.

So set your reminder. Pop in your headphones. Because we're Stephing Up together.

If today's episode helped, leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify is honestly the best thing you can do to help us reach more women.

…

Let's Hang:

Stephing Up on Instagram: @stephing.up

Steph Pase on Instagram: @stephpase_

Steph Pase on YouTube: @stephpase

Shop Planners + Organisation: Steph Pase Planners

Shop Steph's book "Mastering My Messy Life": Penguin Books Australia

Steph's Amazon Storefront: Shop my favourites

As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Did you know Australians buy 56 new pieces of clothing every year; so why do we still have nothing to wear? Stylist Alarna Hope on the wardrobe edit, capsule wardrobes and 3 easy outfit formulas.

This is for you if:

• You've got a full wardrobe and still end up in leggings and the same top every single day
• You walk out of fitting rooms feeling worse than when you walked in
• You hate shopping and just want someone to tell you what actually works
• You feel as though you’ve lost yourself 

In this episode:

• Why you have nothing to wear: Australians buy 56 new pieces of clothing a year, and the real reason none of it goes together
• How to do a wardrobe edit: a stylist's section-by-section method (start with shoes) so it's not an overwhelming all-day cull
• How to declutter clothes without the guilt: the "tried it but didn't wear it" basket and the sentimental box
• Capsule wardrobe explained: why a capsule is for one part of your life, and doesn't have to be beige
• 3 outfit formulas + what's worth tailoring: two neutrals and a colour, the colour sandwich, hems, sleeves and waists

Related episodes:

• S2E31 Colour Analysis 101: The Cheat Code to My Glow Up (with Colour Lab): find your colour season first, then build your wardrobe around it
• S2E15 The Doable Glow Up: 10 Realistic Changes (No 5am Alarm): where "edit your wardrobe" became rule 1

Find Alarna: www.alarnahope.com.au · Instagram @alarnahope · The Capsule Plan (online course) on her site

Follow Stephing Up 🎧

Subscribe, leave a review, and tell me what you're keeping "just in case".

Let's hang:

• @stephing.up: https://instagram.com/stephing.up
• @stephpase_: https://instagram.com/stephpase_
• YouTube: https://youtube.com/@StephPase.
• My book Mastering My Messy Life: Paperback https://amzn.to/4uL4X26 · Audiobook https://amzn.to/3NTTQn5 · Penguin https://www.penguin.com.au/books/mastering-my-messy-life-9781761349256
• Steph Pase Planners: https://www.stephpaseplanners.com.au

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I turn 36 today (rude). These are the things I wish I could go back and tell 30-year-old me, 25-year-old me, and especially 16-year-old me. Six lessons that took me years (and some really hard seasons) to learn, and six practical hacks that make my actual day-to-day easier.

This episode is for you if:

• You're saving the nice perfume for a special occasion that never comes
• You said yes to three things this week you didn't want to do
• You feel "behind" because your life isn't sorted by 35 (I still don't know what's for dinner)

In this episode:

• Life lessons I wish I knew sooner: wear the nice thing now, because we're the occasion
• It's never too late: why you have more time than you think (and less time with the people you love)
• People pleasing vs kindness: why one is a choice and the other is a fear response
• Changing careers in your 30s: you're allowed to change your mind and pivot at any time
• ADHD hacks that actually work for me.

…

Follow Stephing Up

I’m Steph Pase, your (somewhat) organised bestie in your ears. This podcast is about growth that’s messy, building a life that actually fits you, and what happens when life doesn’t go to plan. We’ll talk mental health, motherhood, business, ADHD and how to stop being such an asshole to yourself.

New episodes drop every Monday morning.
So set your reminder. Pop in your headphones. Because we’re Stephing Up together.

If today's episode helped, leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify is honestly the best thing you can do to help us reach more women. 

…

Let’s Hang:

The 2027 Planner Collection is now live! My Skincare routine lives in mine. Shop now.

Shop Organisation: Steph Pase Planners  

Stephing Up on Instagram: @stephing.up        

Steph Pase on Instagram:  @stephpase_         

Steph Pase on Youtube:  @stephpase.                

Shop Steph’s book “Mastering my Messy Life”:    Penguin Books Australia 

Steph’s Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com.au/shop/justanothermummyblog/list/17TTU785IMM53 

 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

ChatGPT told me I was a soft autumn, so I culled my entire wardrobe. Then I got a proper colour analysis and found out I’m a light spring. Whoops. Turns out finding my (right) colour season was the thing that actually changed my glow up.

Rachel from Colour Lab explains colour analysis from scratch, what to wear instead of black, and how knowing your colour season changes your life outside the wardrobe too, from your hair colour to your makeup shades (and I can vouch for that).

This is for you if:

• You’ve ever bought an outfit, put it on, and blamed your face
• You’ve been checking your wrist veins to work out if you’re warm or cool (put your arm down)
• Your wardrobe is 80% black and you’re not sure why it makes you look tired

In this episode:

• What colour analysis is: the 12 seasons, and the 3 things (undertone, chroma, contrast) that decide yours
• Virtual vs in-person colour analysis: how drapes work and why Rachel does it all online
• How ChatGPT got my season wrong (and why I’d already culled my wardrobe)
• Colour analysis beyond your wardrobe: your best hair colour and makeup shades
• Colour analysis myths: the vein test, cool-toned fake tan, gold vs silver, and foundation labels
• What to wear instead of black when black isn’t in your colour season
• How knowing your colour season makes shopping easier
• Does your colour season change as you age? 

 

Find Rachel:

Rachel Bilu is one of Australia’s top virtual colour analysis experts and founder of Colour Lab. Based in Melbourne, available worldwide to help you find your Colour Season and personal style.

• Instagram + all socials: Colour Lab Stylist (@colourlabstylist )
• Website: www.colourlabstylist.com

Use the code STEPHINGUP to get 20% off Rach’s most popular colour analysis package!

• Most popular package (Complete Colour, Hair & Makeup): https://colourlabstylist.com/products/the-complete-colour-hair-makeup-bundle

Related episodes:

• S2E30: Skin Cycling for Beginners: the routine that halved my skincare (the face under the colours)
• S2E15: The Doable Glow Up: where my (very wrong) soft autumn era started

Follow Stephing Up 🎧

Subscribe, leave a review, and send this ep to the friend who's sure she's a soft autumn.

Let's hang:

• @stephing.up: https://instagram.com/stephing.up
• @stephpase_: https://instagram.com/stephpase_
• YouTube: https://youtube.com/@StephPase.
• My book Mastering My Messy Life: Paperback https://amzn.to/4uL4X26 · Audiobook https://amzn.to/3NTTQn5 · Penguin https://www.penguin.com.au/books/mastering-my-messy-life-9781761349256
• Steph Pase Planners: https://www.stephpaseplanners.com.au
• Amazon storefront: https://www.amazon.com.au/shop/justanothermummyblog

As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week's ep is my full skin cycling routine, what your skin barrier actually is, and why I now own half the products I used to. I'm not a dermatologist, I'm a 35-year-old with oily, acne-prone skin who has tried everything. And this is what worked for me.

Your skin doesn't know the routine. I learned this the annoying way. I'd been skin cycling for years, my skin was the best it had ever been, and then I got excited and skipped a recovery night. Tingling. Tight. Red. My skin barrier, very politely, telling me to sit down.

This is for you if:

• You bought a retinol, used it every night like the packet said, and decided you "can't use retinol"
• Everything you put on your face suddenly stings and you can't work out why
• You're in your 30s dealing with breakouts AND fine lines (rude)

In this episode:

• What is the skin barrier, and the signs yours is damaged
• Skin cycling explained, and why it works
• Exfoliation night: BHA vs AHA for oily or dull skin, and the 15-minute rule
• Retinoids for beginners plus the sandwich method
• Recovery nights: why the boring nights matter most

…

Everything I use (not sponsored) 🧴
Shop my Skin Essentials list: linked here 

Cleanser: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B08W2HG4WP?tag=stephpase-22
Micellar water: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0C44X5JML?tag=stephpase-22
BHA exfoliant: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0CJH3R48Z?tag=stephpase-22
Azelaic acid: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0DG1DQ2S7?tag=stephpase-22
TXA serum: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0CQ4ZM4VT?tag=stephpase-22
Barrier serum: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0CMR74JMG?tag=stephpase-22
Hydrating serum: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B07NNVZNQR?tag=stephpase-22
Face spray: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0DCBWM7GT?tag=stephpase-22
Moisturiser: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0FMDRCHXV?tag=stephpase-22
Face towels: https://www.amazon.com.au/dp/B0D5HZHW9B?tag=stephpase-22
Differin (adapalene): ask your pharmacist or doctor. I get mine from the iHerb website. 

As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases.

Episode Links:

1. Episode - Stop Asking What’s Causing your Acne (Ask this instead)

Listen on Spotify 

Listen on Apple

1. The 2027 Planner Collection is now live! My Skincare routine lives in mine. Shop now.

 

…

Follow Stephing Up

I’m Steph Pase, your (somewhat) organised bestie in your ears. This podcast is about growth that’s messy, building a life that actually fits you, and what happens when life doesn’t go to plan. We’ll talk mental health, motherhood, business, ADHD and how to stop being such an asshole to yourself.

New episodes drop every Monday morning.
So set your reminder. Pop in your headphones. Because we’re Stephing Up together.

If today's episode helped, leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify is honestly the best thing you can do to help us reach more women. 

…

Let’s Hang:

 

Stephing Up on Instagram: @stephing.up        

Steph Pase on Instagram:  @stephpase_         

Steph Pase on Youtube:  @stephpase.                

Shop Planners + Organisation: Steph Pase Planners  

Shop Steph’s book “Mastering my Messy Life”:    Penguin Books Australia 

Steph’s Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com.au/shop/justanothermummyblog/list/17TTU785IMM53

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Adulting hacks nobody told me: iPhone settings you're not using, unclaimed money in Australia, free IKEA parts + more. These are the 17 things I found, across tech, life admin and money. Some of them you'll know. A lot of people won't. There's all these things we just assume everyone knows about... and they don't.

This is for you if:

• You're paying for an app your phone already does 
• You hate life admin with a passion, but you'd quite like any money that's sitting there with your name on it
• You've ever stood in the IKEA car park missing one tiny wobbly metal thing

In this episode:

• iPhone hacks nobody tells you about:
• How to find unclaimed money in Australia
• NSW money hacks
• Life admin hacks
• Home + girl math

…

Follow Stephing Up

I’m Steph Pase, your (somewhat) organised bestie in your ears. This podcast is about growth that’s messy, building a life that actually fits you, and what happens when life doesn’t go to plan. We’ll talk mental health, motherhood, business, ADHD and how to stop being such an asshole to yourself.

New episodes drop every Monday morning.
So set your reminder. Pop in your headphones. Because we’re Stephing Up together.

If today's episode helped, leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify is honestly the best thing you can do to help us reach more women. 

…

Let’s Hang:

The 2027 Planner Collection is now live, and selling fast! Lock in your favourite planner before they’re gone: https://www.stephpaseplanners.com.au/collections/planners

Stephing Up on Instagram: @stephing.up        

Steph Pase on Instagram:  @stephpase_         

Steph Pase on Youtube:  @stephpase.                

Shop Planners + Organisation: Steph Pase Planners    

Shop Steph’s book “Mastering my Messy Life”:    Penguin Books Australia 

Steph’s Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com.au/shop/justanothermummyblog/list/17TTU785IMM53 

 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I'm about to ruin your perception of time and likely your day. Hang in there, we'll still be friends at the end. 

I went looking for the facts about time because I've become a broken record. How are my kids this old? How is it already September? Where did the year go? I say some version of that most days. And at the same time (this is the uncomfortable bit) I'm trying to make almost every part of my actual life go faster. YouTube while I cook. Emails in the grocery queue. Podcasts on double speed. I even brush my teeth in a rush. 

Today I’m sharing what I learned.

This is for you if:

• You say "how is it already September" and "where did the year go" more than once a week
• Your days blur together and you can't remember what you actually did on Tuesday
• You've been told to "just be present" and thought, okay, but HOW

In this episode:

• Why time speeds up as you get older
• The two kinds of time: why a doctor's waiting room disappears and a weekend away feels huge
• Why life feels like a blur and what the research says about memory markers
• Living at double speed and what it's doing to us
• How to be more present without meditating: the 5 things I actually do 
• Why it's okay for time to fly and the question that replaced "how do I slow it down"

…

Episode Links: 

Shop Journals: https://www.stephpaseplanners.com.au/collections/journals 

The 2027 Planner Collection is now live, and selling fast! Lock in your favourite planner before they’re gone: https://www.stephpaseplanners.com.au/collections/planners

…

Follow Stephing Up

I’m Steph Pase, your (somewhat) organised bestie in your ears. This podcast is about growth that’s messy, building a life that actually fits you, and what happens when life doesn’t go to plan. We’ll talk mental health, motherhood, business, ADHD and how to stop being such an asshole to yourself.

New episodes drop every Monday morning.
So set your reminder. Pop in your headphones. Because we’re Stephing Up together.

If today's episode helped, leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify is honestly the best thing you can do to help us reach more women. 

…

Let’s Hang:

Stephing Up on Instagram: @stephing.up        

Steph Pase on Instagram:  @stephpase_         

Steph Pase on Youtube:  @stephpase.                

Shop Planners + Organisation: Steph Pase Planners    

Shop Steph’s book “Mastering my Messy Life”:    Penguin Books Australia 

Steph’s Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com.au/shop/justanothermummyblog/list/17TTU785IMM53 

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

I know everyone loves the Let Them Theory… but I actually think there’s one pretty big problem with telling people to simply “let them” and stop caring what other people think.

It kind of asks us to fight against our own psychology.

Humans are wired to care about belonging, rejection and what other people think of us. For most of human history, being accepted by the group wasn’t just nice — it was tied to survival.

Which is probably why one weird comment can derail your entire day, someone seeming “off” sends you into a spiral, or criticism somehow becomes evidence that you’re a terrible person… hi. Same.

For years, I thought the goal was to learn how to stop caring what people think. But the more I’ve looked into the psychology behind it, the more I’ve realised that advice like “just don’t care” can miss something pretty important: humans are literally wired to care about belonging.

So maybe the goal isn’t becoming someone who doesn’t care.

Maybe it’s becoming much more selective about whose opinions are allowed to carry weight.

In this episode, we’re talking about:

• Why some of us take criticism, rejection and other people’s moods so personally
• The very old survival reason your brain cares so much about what other people think
• How negativity bias can make one negative comment louder than 100 positive ones
• Why telling yourself to “just stop caring” often doesn’t actually work
• The difference between receiving feedback and automatically turning it into a judgement about who you are
• Why disagreement doesn’t necessarily mean rejection
• The problem with giving people who barely know you the same voting rights as the people who actually do
• The simple filter I now use before deciding whether someone’s opinion deserves my energy
• The “mailbox” idea that completely changed how I think about criticism
• How to let something sting without letting it become your truth

And towards the end, I’ll give you the questions I now ask myself when a comment gets under my skin — because I’m probably never going to become someone who magically doesn’t care what anyone thinks.

But I can stop handing everyone a vote on who I am.

Follow Stephing Up

I’m Steph Pase, your (somewhat) organised bestie in your ears. This podcast is about growth that’s messy, building a life that actually fits you, and what happens when life doesn’t go to plan. We’ll talk mental health, motherhood, business, ADHD and how to stop being such an asshole to yourself.

New episodes drop every Monday morning.
So set your reminder. Pop in your headphones. Because we’re Stephing Up together.

If today's episode helped, leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify is honestly the best thing you can do to help us reach more women. 

Let’s Hang:

Stephing Up on Instagram: @stephing.up        

Steph Pase on Instagram:  @stephpase_         

Steph Pase on Youtube:  @stephpase.                

Shop Planners + Organisation: Steph Pase Planners    

Shop Steph’s book “Mastering my Messy Life”:    Penguin Books Australia 

Steph’s Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com.au/shop/justanothermummyblog/list/17TTU785IMM53

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Before planners and podcasting, I was a wedding makeup artist. I did hundreds of faces, and these are 10 things I’d want you to know to get more out of your everyday makeup, without replacing your entire makeup bag.

This is for you if:

• You want to elevate your everyday makeup look without spending money 
• You learnt makeup from a Maybelline mousse pot and a lot of guessing, and no one's ever actually shown you
• You've got a drawer full of products and your foundation still somehow ends up pink, grey, or in your hairline
• You're 30-plus and your face looks tired in a way it didn't used to, and you want an instant lift 

Stay til the end for the biggest hack that will save you time and tears 

Follow Stephing Up

I'm Steph Pase, your (somewhat) organised bestie in your ears. This podcast is about growth that's messy, building a life that actually fits you, and what happens when life doesn't go to plan. We'll talk mental health, motherhood, business, ADHD and how to stop being such an asshole to yourself.

New episodes drop every Monday morning. So set your reminder. Pop in your headphones. Because we're Stephing Up together.

If today's episode helped, leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify is honestly the best thing you can do to help us reach more people. .

Let's Hang:

• Stephing Up on Instagram: https://instagram.com/stephing.up
• Steph Pase on Instagram: https://instagram.com/stephpase_
• Steph Pase on YouTube: https://youtube.com/@StephPase.
• Shop Planners + Organisation: https://www.stephpaseplanners.com.au
• Shop Steph's book "Mastering My Messy Life": https://www.penguin.com.au/books/mastering-my-messy-life-9781761349256

Steph's Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com.au/shop/justanothermummyblog/list/17TTU785IMM53

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Last week I shared my whole health journey (the 25 kilo one, if you missed it... it's a doozy). This week’s episode is the part everyone actually asked for: the current routine. What I train, what I eat, and how it sticks... with the reminder that this is what works for ME. It's not a cookie cutter program. Take what fits your life and your brain, then leave the rest.

This is for you if:

• You've restarted the same routine so many times you've stopped telling people it's a restart
• You joined a gym in a burst of confidence and now you can't make yourself walk in
• You're doing everything "right" (the HIIT, the 10K steps, the tiny meals) and feeling worse instead of better

In this episode:

• What changed in the last six months and why the scales went in the bin
• My exact training split and the rest-period mistake that stalls your strength
• What I eat in a day
• How to stay consistent with ADHD and why the gym became my source of peace
• Alcohol, honestly and the book that finally unhooked it
• Gym anxiety and permission to be a beginner
• Where to start after years off the ridiculously-small-first-goal method 

…

Episode Links: 

Slow-cooked Mexican Beef: watch me make it at https://www.instagram.com/reels/DQBs-k8kgH2/

Shop Health Journals: https://www.stephpaseplanners.com.au/collections/health-diaries 

The 2027 Planner Collection is now live, and selling fast! Lock in your favourite planner before they’re gone: https://www.stephpaseplanners.com.au/collections/planners

…

Follow Stephing Up

I’m Steph Pase, your (somewhat) organised bestie in your ears. This podcast is about growth that’s messy, building a life that actually fits you, and what happens when life doesn’t go to plan. We’ll talk mental health, motherhood, business, ADHD and how to stop being such an asshole to yourself.

New episodes drop every Monday morning.
So set your reminder. Pop in your headphones. Because we’re Stephing Up together.

If today's episode helped, leaving a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify is honestly the best thing you can do to help us reach more women. 

…

Let’s Hang:

Stephing Up on Instagram: @stephing.up        

Steph Pase on Instagram:  @stephpase_         

Steph Pase on Youtube:  @stephpase.                

Shop Planners + Organisation: Steph Pase Planners    

Shop Steph’s book “Mastering my Messy Life”:    Penguin Books Australia 

Steph’s Amazon Storefront: https://www.amazon.com.au/shop/justanothermummyblog/list/17TTU785IMM53

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.