In this week’s Pop Culture Thursday, Jared dives right into a mix of pop culture headlines, from Julia Fox’s confusing sexuality “clarification” to the oddly awkward obituary of TikTok star John Crawley, better known as “King Beard X.” He jokes about how embarrassing it would be if his own comedy nicknames showed up in his obituary. Things get wilder with a Hamptons story of a woman in her 50s allegedly biting a six-year-old during a t-shirt gun brawl—something Jared insists should mean jail time. He pokes fun at a headline calling Austin Butler “fearless” for shooing away a bee near Zoë Kravitz, and rolls his eyes at Jay Cutler airing divorce grievances online. To wrap it up, Jared defends the Coldplay kiss cam, insisting we can’t let cheaters ruin a fun tradition. It’s goofy, ranty, and oddly heartfelt all at once.

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