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Tao Te Ching Verse 54

translated by Hua-Ching Ni

What is well planted cannot be pulled up.
What is closely embraced cannot slip away.
The wise establish virtue firmly within themselves, and are honored for generations
ever after.

Apply natural, integral virtue to your own character,
and it will be genuine.
Apply natural, integral virtue to the family,
and it will abound.
Apply natural, integral virtue to the state,
and it will flourish abundantly.
Apply natural, integral virtue to the world,
and it will be pervasive.

Understand other people's lives by means of your own life.
Understand other people's families by means of your own family.
Understand other societies by means of your own society.
Understand other countries by means of your own country.
How can you know what is right for the world?
By knowing what is right for your own life.

Photo by NASA on Unsplash

Handed down from Generation to Generation

Growing up in Southwestern Pennsylvania, I experienced an environment that was much like my immediate ancestors.  There were old streets with names like Wageman drive.   We ate hotdogs and sauerkraut, sometimes haluski, and did friday fish fries during the springtime.

All of that seemed normal to me - you know, the way things were.  It wasn’t until I was stationed in Germany with the Army and came home for a visit that I realized my Southwestern PA experience was an echo of three or four generations past that had largely come from there.  

My family on my mother’s side was largely German.  But we never talked about it - it wasn’t a thing that came up in conversations.  

Some of the German culture as it revealed itself in interpersonal relations I experienced in Europe was present in my hometown, as well.  When scolding a child in PA, an adult would make a fist with his left hand, extending the index finger.  With his right index finger, he would hold it perpendicular to the left finger and move it from his left knuckle to his fingernail in the same way one might peel a carrot.  That would be accompanied by a verbal “shame on you.”  I saw the same thing in Germany. "Scham," is what they would say.

If this is the case for external influences, I wonder how many internal influences were also passed on.  I remember growing up learning that I didn’t matter as much as my work ethic mattered.  I needed to do well for my employer.  Despite whether or not I wanted to work, I needed to work.  I didn’t need to go around trying to find my passion - that was for people who didn't have to worry about putting bread on the table.  I needed to save my money.  The adults in my life were the absolute authorities, and if I didn’t behave, it was expected of me to feel guilty about it. 

It wouldn’t be until I began my journey with the Tao that I realized that everything I thought was reality while growing up was just a collection of experiences heavily influenced by past emotional and economic environments, environments that didn’t even exist anymore!  I have spent a short time so far unlearning some of those destructive thinking and emotional habits.  No longer do I have the belief that I don’t matter.  That I am alone.  That I should be ashamed of myself for things I think or do, especially if I’ve made mistakes in earnest.