We take a brief reprieve this week from our slew of Patron requests to dive back into the deep, dark waters of Amazon Short Reads. Chris pulled Identity Switch: Becoming the Woman Who Gets What She Wants by April & Adrianna Mason from the depths because it appeared to be pulsing with Ho Tactics vibes. Beneath these initial vibes, though, Paris & Chris discover that this is actually a self-help book they can almost get behind.

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, today's episode includes discussion or mention of: sexual assault and stereotypical western patriarchal gender roles

Our patron Lynn requested that we read Arabiolosis by Nathen Mazri, the man who brought the world GarfieldEATS. We were soon launched into an endless downward internet spiral of Garficcinos and rancid lasagna to discover what toxic amounts of privilege can unleash upon the world.

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, today's episode includes discussion or mention of: gender and sexual politics in Saudi Arabia and HIV/AIDS.

We return to the wild land of bizarro fiction this week to discuss Drag Queen Dino Fighters by MP Johnson. This was requested by our patron Robin, who then provided us with the Amazon Kindle file when we let them know the book was out of print and unavailable through any used book sellers. Thank you, Robin!

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, today's episode includes discussion or mention of: animal violence, extraterrestrials, hunting, gore, sex, and general horror absurdity.

One of our anonymous patrons asked us to choose a light novel for their Patron's Choice episode this season, so we chose this because the title made us laugh. We, uh, got volume 7 instead of 1 because we thought the 7 was a 1. So what!? Strangely enough we read a different light novel a few episodes ago for a different patron and they happen to be from the same publisher. Can TBC survive another light novel so soon after the last one?

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, today's episode just has some descriptions of cartoon-level violence

Chris went on another deep dive into the "Short Reads" category on Amazon and found Dating & Crypto, a brand new self-help guide which promises to teach you how to use cryptocurrency to boost your dating game. Although we learned nothing useful about crypto or dating, we did learn that a side hustle making low-level e-books on Amazon for $9.99 might be worth pursuing.

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, today's episode includes discussion of heteronormative dating stereotypes and the usual gendered weirdness that comes along with that.

We read All Our Wrong Todays by Elan Mastai for our Patron Lucek as our tribute to his patronage for 2022! He said, "I'm kinda requesting this one for my sanity. I read the reviews, went in hopeful, and then well. . . I'm now wondering if I read the same book. If I'm not remembering it wrong or psychotic. . . I'm sorry."

There's a lot to like about this book, but we fell out of love with it as the novel wore on.

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, today's episode includes discussion of infidelity, sexual assault, and suicide.

We had so many friends and listeners contact us and ask us to read this that we squeezed it into the schedule for this year. You're welcome.

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, today's episode includes discussion of: American politics, racism, feminism, and all that could possibly entail. If you're not interested in hearing American political discourse or discussions about race and gender, please choose another episode.

For this week's Patron's Choice episode, we read Interspecies Reviewers (Vol. 1): Ecstasy Days by Tetsuo Habara for our Patron Austin. He said that he, "decided to choose this glorious novel for [his] recommendation...since [he] has little chance to talk about [it] in polite company or for that matter, most impolite company." Reluctantly, we did have some positive things to say about this book. Still, we wouldn't recommend it unless you had...very particular needs.

Content Warnings: We're reading porn today, people. In addition to our usual barnyard language, this episode includes discussion of: explicit sexual situations involving age play, basiliskgirls, birdgirls, catgirls, cuckoldry, elves, halflings who look like children (so here's your pedophilia warning), and spirits; a moment of racism.

We take a break from Patron's Choice episodes this week to discuss HYDRATE RIGHT!: The Effective Way To Drink Water by Dr. Lesley Ike. Chris found this on a recent fateful dive into the "Short Reads" category on Amazon and, well...how could we pass this up?

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, this episode includes mildly gross body/medical talk.

This time, we read Hangman's Curse (The Veritas Project Vol. 1) by Frank Peretti as requested by our Patron, BeastWithTheLeast! They said that, "It's probably the laughably worst YA novel I've ever read (or that I haven't blissfully forgotten about)." Join us on this Christian Scooby Doo escapade and learn about spider mating! Who needs evolution or accurate science anyway?

Content Warnings: In addition to our usual barnyard language, this episode includes discussion of: Christianity/religion, death, hanging, poison, spiders, and suicide.